


Like Father, Like Son

by thelilacfield



Series: Father Figure [1]
Category: Glee
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Family Drama, First Love, Infidelity, M/M, Multiple Partners, Slow Burn
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-04-07
Updated: 2015-08-31
Packaged: 2018-03-21 19:14:57
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 12
Words: 57,835
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3702777
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thelilacfield/pseuds/thelilacfield
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After his parents' divorce a year ago, it would be silly to think Blaine isn't nervous to meet his father's new boyfriend. Kurt turns out to be sweet and understanding and very much in love with Walter - and incredibly gorgeous. With no one to turn to and confide in, Blaine finds himself soon plunged into an emotional minefield, where a single step wrong will hurt someone he cares about.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Prologue: Some Other Beginning's End

**A/N:** This is a prologue to the true story, and there is no Kurt/Blaine interaction in this chapter. I just wanted to set up the real story. The meat of it will probably be posted all at once, as soon as I can finish it. Written as a fill for [this prompt](http://glee-kink-meme.livejournal.com/50716.html?thread=64989212#t64989212) on the GKM. Please enjoy, and let me know what you think :)

* * *

The ink is still drying on the divorce papers as Walter stands in the doorway of the lawyer's office building to avoid the downpour lashing against the sidewalk. Pulling his coat closer around him, he turns when he hears the door swing open, and watches Mr. Dartmoore embrace Lorraine gently, his face a mask of sympathy. The hot twinge of guilt in the pit of his stomach is brief - they tried, but Dr. Monroe couldn't do anything for them, even with her understanding eyes and soothing voice and years of experience. When the love just isn't there, it's time to let go. They've had a good run - together for fifteen years, married for twelve. Most people who marry their high school sweetheart - especially those who got married while still in high school, and had two children before they even had stable careers - don't spend the rest of their life with them, they've always known that. But, well, they've signed the papers now. It's official, and frightening.

"Lorraine..." The soft word trails into silence as she walks past him, putting up her umbrella as the wind tugs gently at her silky scarf and rustles the hem of her dark dress. She turns to him, face pale in the grey day but eyes hard and set, like steel. "Good luck."

"You too," she says softly, and kisses his cheek gently. Once again, he marvels at how close in height she is to him - he's sure that one day Cooper and Natalie, currently with their Grandpa Blymouth and throwing tantrums over their parents officially divorcing, will be tall teenagers. He watches Lorraine go with a feeling like sadness in the depths of his stomach, a sense of disappointment that they couldn't prove all their critics wrong and make it.

Back in their house, that he'll soon have to leave for a smaller apartment, he fills a tumbler with amber whisky and takes down their photo albums. Their wedding day, both of them so young and naive and full of delusions about love and commitment. Just two teenagers in love, smiling at the camera, Lorraine's plain white dress blowing in the breeze ruffling the petals of the pink roses clutched in one trembling fist. He looks so young, nerves in his eyes, holding her hand as if afraid she might blow away if he lets go. She was so wild and free back then, like a sunbeam flitting from place to place, a balloon lifting him away from the earth, letting him live in a daydream.

He remembers when they first found out she was pregnant, their overwhelming joy, her smiling dreams of filling their tiny apartment - all two college students striving to get away from their parents and start a life together could afford - with feminine touches and the scents of baking and enough toys for a dozen children. But when the baby came, everything stopped making sense, the tapestry slowly unravelling, month by month. By the time Natalie was born, a scarlet, squalling little girl, they were both exhausted. So much sun was gone from Lorraine, she was quiet and simply did what needed to be done for their son, jealous of his baby sister. Their love was already fading - this was inevitable.

Christmas comes and gos, spent alone for the first time in his life. Lorraine took Cooper and Natalie to her sister in Pennsylvania, to get them all away for a Christmas in the snow, with Alice's dogs to distract them. Sitting in front of his tiny Christmas tree, Walter hopes desperately that they won't be teased when they go back to school for their new status as the children of a broken home - this isn't their fault. It shouldn't affect them, turn his sunny children into sullen teenagers. He clings to the hope that it won't, even as Cooper's moods blacken and Natalie becomes withdrawn, refusing to hug him when they visit him.

"They'll come around," Lorraine assures him, but Walter hears Natalie asking, "When are you and Dad gonna get married again?" as they're leaving, and lets his head thud into his hands with a heavy sigh.

It's barely been a month since they signed the final papers - although their marriage has been over for years, they're both completely aware of that - when he meets Pamela. Returning smugly from being offered a promotion that will allow him to buy a much nicer house and travel all over the country - perhaps the world - like he's always wanted, he stops the car outside the Lima Bean and heads in. "What can I get you?" the barista asks, as cheerfully as always, but this time he notices the red rims around her eyes and pauses to look at her.  _Really_  look at her.

Her nametag reads  _Pamela Rourke_ , and he notices the slight bulge of her belly beneath her uniform. She's pregnant, no more than ten or twelve weeks. But with her wildly curly hair, barely held back by a hairband, and her bright eyes and tiny figure, she's extremely pretty, and too young to look so sad. "What's wrong?" he asks, and she shakes her head. "Please, let me buy you a cup of coffee and we can talk about it. Or we could do this over dinner?"

"Are you asking me out?" she asks, and he shrugs and gives her the smallest smile. "I'm afraid I couldn't, sir. There are strict rules about fraternising with customers," even as she says it, the corner of her mouth twitches with barely suppressed mirth, "and I'm still getting over my last boyfriend. Anyway, aren't you married?"

"Newly divorced, before Christmas, although it was over years ago, we were just determined to prove everyone wrong by gritting our teeth and sticking it through," Walter replies easily, showing her the tan line on his bare ring finger and seeing the flicker in her eyes. "It doesn't have to be a date. We can just go out as friends. But I would like to hear your story, and you've been so kind to me, I'd like to show you a little of that in return."

"Oh fine," Pamela says, but her eyes are shining and she's smiling. "I finish at seven, you can pick me up and sweep me off my feet with a burger." As he takes his coffee, she smiles and says, "And you can call me Pam, Walter."

He goes one step further, taking her out to his favourite Italian restaurant, looking at her tiny, neat figure in her belted wool dress and shiny brown boots, her curls looking a little less wild now she's not forcing them back, falling around her pretty face. "So what's your story?" she asks, sipping at her milkshake. "Oh my God, that's like heaven."

"Not much to tell," Walter says, and smiles when she raises an eyebrow at him. "Lorraine and I started dating sophomore year. We fancied ourselves starcrossed lovers, and we got married right after graduation. Cooper came along when we were only nineteen, and we fell out of love trying to keep a family together. Cooper is eleven now, and Natalie is nine. They're both upset about the divorce, and want us to get married again." Noticing the way Pam pointedly looks away when the waitress comes over to offer them coffee, he asks, "And you?"

"I'm only twenty, in case you hadn't realised," she says softly. "I never went to college, devastating my parents. I had all these dreams about running off to New York or LA and finding fame by being pretty and being able to sing and dance a little, but within a few months I slunk back home and took the job at the Lima Bean. I was meaning to apply to college and have a late start, but I met a guy in the summer, and he ruined me. I found out I'm pregnant, and then he took off back to the Philippines to be with his family. Now my parents want me to give the baby up, when all I want do is keep it and be a mom. Ironic, huh?" Her face twists despite the joke, and his heart goes out to her. She's just a kid, blundering around in the dark looking for a light switch, the way he was when Lorraine was pregnant with Cooper, just a little younger than this tiny, adorable girl sitting across from him.

"Listen, Pam, I might have an idea," he says softly. "I know I'm eleven years older than you, and your parents will be wildly disapproving, but I'm willing to support you. If you want to do it alone, I'll understand completely. But, with the promotion I've just secured, I'm making enough money to support a young woman who's run into trouble and her child. If you want me to."

"My parents will approve very much," Pam says without stopping, and he laughs. "All they've ever wanted is for me to settle for someone stable, always bemoaning my wild boyfriends. And my dad is eight years older than my mom, they wouldn't judge us." She smiles at him across the table, and lays a wistful hand on her belly. "But we won't be too public with it. We don't want people thinking you were cheating on your wife with me, or that the baby is yours."

Standing at her side three months later, the minister happily announcing them man and wife, the baby boy in Pam's swollen belly kicking the hand he lays there as they kiss, Walter can't help but laugh at the thought that what he proposed that day could've led to anything but marriage. As Pamela Rourke becomes Pamela Anderson, her parents look unbearably proud in the front pew, and she waves at the congregation with pure joy bright in her eyes, laughing when her grandmother catches the bouquet and chattering nineteen to the dozen with every guest, showing them the ultrasound pictures and gasping with delight over the presents.

Cooper and Natalie were both reluctant guests, and are united against Pam's cheerful family, sulking in the corner. "Come and watch the cake cutting, you two," Walter says, trying to keep the pleading note out of his voice. "Pam has two lovely nephews around your age, and the gardens are beautiful. You could go and have some fun, it won't get dark for hours."

"April first," Cooper intones dully, staring up at him with all the truculence of a twelve year old hopelessly affected by the divorce, in ways Walter dared to hope he wouldn't be. "We all know the real joke is you marrying some slut that got herself knocked up. It won't last. She just wants money and support, and she'll take off as soon as the baby comes."

"Cooper Lee Anderson!" Walter thunders, attracting the attention of one of Pamela's aunts - her family really is huge, her side of the church wild and colourful and riotous compared to his more sober relatives and friends. "We are all a family now, and we  _will_  respect each other! You will not speak about your stepmother like that!"

"She'll never be my mother!" Cooper shouts. "She stole you from my real mom!" He takes off into the church grounds, disappearing among the greenery, and Natalie follows him, the pretty circlet of dark red roses resting on her auburn hair clattering to the ground.

Pam's hand slides into his, and she leans into him with a sigh. "It's an adjustment for all of us," she says gently. "They'll probably never like me, but that's okay. I'm sure that they'll hate any new partner Lorraine finds just as much. Hell hath no fury like two kids who want their parents to get back together and are suddenly faced with the reality that they won't."

"I love you," he says, and she beams up at him, looking so sweet with the circlet of white roses balanced on her blonde-streaked hair, her shiny eyes and soft lips and flushed cheeks. She looks so elegant in her white lace, the hem fluttering around her knees and her belly rounded beneath the material, beckoning his hand sliding across the stretched skin.

"I love you too," she says lightly, and brushes a kiss against his lips. "Now, I want to show my handsome, older, successful husband off to all my high school friends who made snarky comments when I got pregnant." Grinning, he lets himself be dragged off by her, ready to ride the rollercoaster all over again.

Blaine is born that August, in the middle of the night, a tiny red yowling creature that Pam looks at with the most incredible love in her eyes. Walter can't help but smile, watching her with her son, with  _their_  baby, and when he sweeps his wife and child home to their new home he almost feels that it's the first day of the rest of his life.

His relationship with Lorraine, which they've been trying hard to keep civil for the sake of Cooper and Natalie, turns extremely sour after his marriage to Pam. She calls him screaming, asking what she really ever meant to him, frostily ignoring his truths that their marriage ended years ago, probably before Natalie was even born. He's not sure if she eggs Cooper and Natalie on to keep being the wicked stepchildren fairytales never warned anyone about, torturing Pam and taking every opportunity to sneak into the nursery and poke Blaine, making him cry.

But, a year after Blaine is born, when he's grown into a toddler so handsome people stop to coo at him in the street, chubby-cheeked and bright-eyed with his mother's curly hair, darker than hers, Walter is trying to keep the smugness out of his smile when Lorraine turns up flushed and starry-eyed on their doorstep, with a tall, lanky red-haired man in tow, who she introduces as Trevor, 'the new light of my life'. "I'm sorry I was such a shit to you after you married Pam," she says over coffee, and Walter knows that Pam is hiding laughter when she turns to gaze out of the window. "I was just jealous. After clinging to us for so long, I didn't know how to be okay with you finding love again. But now I have Trev," she looks at him with slavish adoration, a way she never really looked at him, "I can understand perfectly."

By the time Blaine is two years old, sweet and placid despite all the warnings from their families, talking and toddling around enchanting everyone, Lorraine and Trevor are living together, fully committed and have their own baby, a little girl named Virginia who will be inevitably redheaded. Cooper and Natalie, now fourteen and twelve, are both insane with jealousy. Alternating their time between Lorraine and Trevor and Walter and Pam, they take to torturing Blaine. He desperately wants to keep up with his older stepsiblings - Cooper lanky and brooding, Natalie sulky and short - and chases after them on chubby legs, crying when they won't let him keep up.

In hindsight, Walter knows he should've done more to stop them bullying Blaine. They make his life miserable until the day Natalie turns eighteen, when Blaine is eight, and leaves home - though they both still visit frequently to torture their stepbrother. He knows that Pam hates him for it, and he should be trying harder. It gets a little easier to breathe when his older children move away and into their own lives, and he's just left with Blaine, still a breathtaking child with his big golden eyes and mess of dark curls, enchanted by music and performing. When he takes him to New York for a long weekend after his tenth birthday, they see  _Wicked_  on the Broadway stage, and Blaine drifts around in a daydream for days, enchanted by the magic of the theatre.

He's still just a child, barely beginning to grow taller or wider, when he looks at them with guarded eyes over dinner one night and quietly says, "Mom, Dad, I'm gay." Pam looks stricken, and Walter can see the way Blaine's face falls, thinking they're angry. "I'm sorry."

"Oh sweetheart, don't be sorry," Pam says, and her chair scrapes against the stone floor as she scrambles up to hug her son, pressing her face into his hair. Even though Blaine is fourteen, the age when so many teenagers push their parents away, he clings to her, and the tension slowly drains out of him. "Do you like that very sweet boy you brought to dinner last week?"

Shyly, Blaine smiles and says, "I've asked him to the Sadie Hawkins dance next weekend."

Pam claps her hands, eyes shining. "My little boy's first date! I'm so proud of you, baby." She looks so young, her face free of lines and her hair still as perfect as it was the day they met - she's learned how to smooth her curls out over the year, elegant waves curling gently over her shoulders - and once again Walter is reminded of their eleven year age difference. She's only thirty-four, while he's fast approaching fifty, feeling all the nostalgia of those who want to cling to youth, thinking of everything he might have missed out on.

They wave Blaine off to the school dance, looking young and scared but handsome in his tuxedo, curls smoothed down with gel. His date, Charlie, is auburn haired and bespectacled, clearly very nervous to meet them, and they hold hands shyly. Walter almost dabs at his eyes, thinking about young love in those dizzying days of adolescence, and Pam is laughing at him, her engagement ring and wedding ring and the gold band he bought her for their tenth anniversary digging into his palm when she digs her fingers into his. "You are so nostalgic for your glory days," she giggles, unpinning her hair with a sigh of relief and leaning into him, so small and compact in his arms. "Just remember, you're the one who decided to get married right out of high school."

She's not laughing when the phone rings at midnight, tears streaming down her cheeks as they drive to the hospital and sit in the waiting room for terrible minutes, her nails biting grooves into his palm as they wait and wait for news, horrible thoughts chasing each other around his head, awful ideations of what could happen to their precious son. The nurse who emerges looks exhausted, but smiles reassuringly at them and lets them see Blaine. Pam sobs brokenly when she sees him, bandaged and sedated, sleeping in his hospital gown with his skin grey against the white sheets. "I'm so sorry, my little dove," she whispers, and Walter cries just to see her so broken, cries for his son who can't find acceptance here. "Oh Blainey, I'm so sorry." She turns her tear-streaked face up to him, eyes rimmed with red, and says, "We can't send him back to that awful school."

He understands perfectly, and emails his father-in-law the very next day. Johnathan and Samantha Rourke dote on their daughter and their handsome grandson, and a week later a cheque arrives, enough money for Blaine to try repeating his freshman year of high school - cut short by his injuries at the dance - at Dalton Academy in Westerville. He loves it there, blossoms in the blazer, and they watch him lead the glee club to victory at Nationals in his junior year, both beaming with pride.

Blaine told them after he joined the Warblers that all he wanted to do was make art and help people. Walter can hear that voice in his mind when he wakes up on what he could consider the first day of the rest of his life - how ironic, to be thinking that the year he turns forty-nine - and approaches Pam with that serious look on his face. "Oh honey, I've known for years," she says, waving him away with a smile. "Let's stay friends and stay living together, you're the best man in my life. And we should call Blaine as soon as possible, this might freak him out."

But Blaine just smiles over the Skype call, and says, "Well, as long as you're both happy and you're going to stay friends, I don't mind. You're still my dad, no matter what. And now maybe Cooper and Natalie won't have so much of a grudge." Waving frantically, he says, "Virginia is calling, we're going out on the town tonight. I'll visit you in a few weeks."

Walter and Pam both turn to each other as Blaine vanishes, and she's the first to laugh. "He always zigs when I think he's about to zag," she says. "Parenthood is such an adventure. I wonder if lightning will strike twice and I'll find another successful, handsome, older husband." She wink, and Walter laughs fondly. She's the true love of his life, but now he has a chance to find a man to share his life with, to be himself after suppressing it for so long.

There are flirtations over the next year, but nothing serious. There's the necessity of letting their families know about their divorce, the fear of horror swept away when Pam's parents just laugh and talk about new additions to their family. Lorraine is thrilled for him, and Trevor shakes his hand and talks vaguely about someone he might know. Virginia, now a ravishing seventeen year old and one of Blaine's best friends, is similarly excited. Cooper and Natalie are all stony silences, and Walter can't help but worry about all the ways he might have screwed up his two eldest, now both with steady careers and relocating across the country, far away from him.

It's February 2015, almost twenty years after his divorce from Lorraine, when he's driving very slowly down the road outside Scandals, the tinny sound of distant music in his ears. Although he hasn't yet been into the club, it's apparently changed ownership and been improved in recent years. Pam is always teasing him about going there, and as he turns into the parking lot he hears her voice in his head like a bell, her giggles.

When he opens his door, the first thing he notices is the man sitting on the kerb, staring down at the road with the most absorbed expression, swaying slightly. Hearing the car door slam, he looks up, and his dazzling smile takes Walter's breath away. He looks around Blaine's age - but he must be older to get into the club - and he's surely the most stunning man he's ever seen, coiffed hair dark with sweat, the top three buttons of his stark black shirt loosened, silvery scarf hanging around his shoulders and legs long in tight jeans and shiny brown boots. "Hello," he says brightly, and waves slightly. "Who are you?"

"I'm Walter," he says, and takes a seat next to the beautiful boy who beams at him, swaying up against him and away again like a slender sapling in the wind. "What are you doing sitting out here?"

"Well, it's my birthday," he hiccups, and then looks at his watch. "No, no it's not, but it was. Valentine's Day is such a shitty day to be born, I don't know what my parents were thinking." Looking over at Walter, slightly cross-eyed but no less beautiful for it with his flushed cheeks and seductive smile, he says, "I seem to have lost my designated driver. Oh please, oh please, take me home." Pitching sideways, hair bouncing with the movement, he beams up and says, "I'm Kurt, by the way. I'm, like,  _super_  single."

Swallowing a laugh, Walter sets Kurt upright and says, "We better find your designated driver. Who did you come with?"

"My friends came over from New York for the weekend," Kurt says, a little wistfully. "Rachel and Santana. They're somewhere in there. That's San's car." He waves at a bright red one, standing out even in the gloom. "Devil in a red car."

"Come on, you'll need to show me which ones they are so you can get home safely," Walter says, and puts an arm around Kurt's waist to haul him upright. Giggling, Kurt snuggles into him, breathing warm against his neck, and when they get into the club there's a shriek and two very beautiful women come running, one in a red dress and the other in backless black, both clearly extremely drunk. So much for a designated driver.

He ends up driving all three of them home and giving Santana the money for a taxi back to get her car at a later time. When he pulls up outside Kurt's house, where all three of them are staying, Kurt looks suddenly stricken with misery. "Come on, Kurt, time for sleep," Rachel says, tugging at him.

"No!" Kurt squeals loudly, slapping at her grasping hands. "If we go to sleep it's not my birthday anymore and we'll break the spell." He smiles then, flirtatious and charming, slipping a little further down in his seat. "Do you want to go out some time?"

"I'll give you my number, and you can call me at a later date, when you haven't had quite so much to drink," Walter says gently, and Kurt giggles as he hands his phone over.

"I get a boyfriend for my twenty-first," he says, and sways over to plant a kiss on Walter's cheek before Rachel finally gets him out of the car and they stumble up to the house, tunelessly singing  _Happy Birthday_. Laughing to himself, Walter drives home and falls asleep thinking about shining eyes and laughter.

They're dating less than a week later, a couple to be admired in pictures. Pam unexpectedly adores Kurt, treating him like one of her own children - it helps considerably that Kurt says, "But you can't possibly have been married for nineteen years, you look far too young!' the first time he meets her - and Walter has never been happier, so secure in who he is with this stunning man on his arm. Kurt's father is less enthusiastic, but he can understand that perfectly. A twenty-nine year age difference is a lot more than the eleven years between him and Pam, but Kurt just laughs at the naysayers and curls closer. "Forget them," he says, lying in bed as the dawn stripes the room, so stunningly beautiful that Walter has to pinch himself to be sure he's not dreaming. "I like you and you like me. Nothing else matters."

Kurt is everything he could ever have wanted in a man. He's beautiful, intelligent, talented, charming. He's excited to meet Cooper and Natalie and Blaine, and, despite wrinkling her nose when she sees how young he is, Lorraine thinks he's adorable. When they're alone together, the little gasps and whimpers Kurt lets out are the most erotic thing Walter has ever heard. He could lose hours dreaming of his pleasure-glazed eyes and hot, flushed skin. They're happy, ridiculously so, and...well, he's always been hopelessly, recklessly impulsive. It doesn't take long to begin thinking of Kurt in the context of marriage.


	2. Feels Like The Very First Time

**A/N:** Changed my mind about posting the rest of the fic as a whole, but I will try to update as quickly as possible each time. I'm very excited to tell this story, so please let me know if you're enjoying the journey :)

* * *

Tempted by the glossy promise of magazine covers in one of the airport stores, Tina squeals when Blaine tugs on their linked arms to get her away. "You're such a buzzkill," she says, and Blaine beams sweetly at her, their suitcases crashing together. Pushing her sunglasses higher up her nose, Tina breathes in deeply and proclaims, "Ah, that sweet scent of prejudice and casual homophobia!" a little too loudly for the crowded airport.

Rolling his eyes, but unable to help the fond smile twitching the corners of his mouth, Blaine pulls his phone out of his back pocket and texts his mother.

**To: Mom**

**Where are you? And are you really sure it's okay for Tina to stay over tonight?**

**From: Mom**

**I'm outside, my little dove. I brought my own car, it's a little more conspicuous than your father's. And of course it's okay - why wouldn't it be?**

**To: Mom**

**Well, if Dad's new boyfriend is coming over, I don't want him to be overwhelmed by too many people. He's already got to meet me and the evil stepsiblings.**

**From: Mom**

**Don't be silly, Tina's a sweet girl. Anyway, he's met both the ex-wives - for most new partners that's the hardest part over with. We've told him a lot about you - less about Cooper and Natalie ;)**

**To: Mom**

**You always tell me I have to respect them.**

**From: Mom**

**I'm your mother, you have to listen to my advice even if I don't follow it. Anyway, they're going to dislike him on principle because he's not Lorraine. See you in a minute, my little dove.**

" _Tina_ , come  _on_!" Blaine says loudly when Tina stops outside the restaurant, staring longingly at the menu. "Mom's spent days cleaning the house and making amazing food, and you've spent the whole flight talking my ear off about how you can't wait to meet my dad's boyfriend."

"I wonder if he's in a situation like your dad, marriages under his belt," Tina says cheerfully, linking her arm securely through his and smiling flirtatiously at the man who gives her an appraising glance. "Or maybe he's been lonely for a long time and your dad could be his key to happiness. It's so exciting! I love seeing new couples, they're always so affectionate and all over each other."

"I'm not sure I want to see my dad all over someone," Blaine says faintly, and Tina laughs, releasing him as they step out into the blazing sunshine to run to Pam's arms, embracing her like a long-lost sister. In her heels, Tina is an inch or two taller than Pam, and Blaine smiles at the two most important women in his life.

"My little dove!" Pam calls, and throws her arms around him, leaving an imprint of her lipstick on his cheek when she kisses him. "Look at you, you've lost weight. You could've let me know you were struggling, we don't want you fading away to nothing."

"He has a crush on the manager of the gym near campus, Pam, so he's been going a lot," Tina says, and Blaine makes an outraged noise at her wicked smirk. Pam laughs, and helps them heft their luggage into the trunk. As they pull smoothly away from the airport - Pam has always been a great driver, patiently teaching Blaine when he was sixteen - Tina sunnily asks, "How's Walter?"

"Like a teenager bringing their significant other to meet their parents for the first time," Pam says with that long-suffering fondness in her voice, and Tina laughs. "He's so anxious, I've never seen him like this. Even before our wedding, the minister said he was the calmest groom he'd ever seen. I sent him out around midday, he was getting under my feet trying to make sure everything would be perfect. Hopefully Kurt can calm him down, he's always seemed the calming type when he's come over." She smiles at Blaine, and says, "I've made so much food, you'll be eating the leftovers for the next week. I hope you like fettuccine, Tina."

"When have I ever disliked something you made, Pam?" Tina replies sweetly, and Pam beams at her. Blaine has to smile at the relationship between them - they've been best friends since Blaine brought Tina home from one of the boring Dalton-Crawford mixers, after she'd gotten mildly drunk on the spiked punch and confided that her parents were away. He hadn't wanted to leave her alone, and the friendship between Pam and Tina has been building since she'd made her a breakfast for the hungover the next morning.

The drive back to Westerville is pleasant, the sun streaming through the windows and Broadway playing through the car speakers, Tina singing along, the summer breeze whipping through the car. "Mo-om, do you have to have the windows open?" Blaine asks, digging into his carry-on for the half-full tube of hairgel. "I don't want to meet Dad's boyfriend looking like a mess."

"You look lovely, dear," Tina says from the back seat, and Blaine rolls his eyes when Pam laughs. Sometimes, his mother and his best friend being so close can have its disadvantages.

The moment the car crunches into their driveway, Tina vanishes upstairs, shouting, "I'm going to freshen up quickly!" over the distinctive roar of the shower. Rolling his eyes once more, Blaine pulls their luggage in from the car and hefts it up the stairs into his room. The blow-up mattress for Tina is already in place, and he throws her suitcase onto it, quickly checking his hair in the mirror and changing into an outfit slightly more appropriate for meeting his father's boyfriend than his sweatpants and a NYADA T-shirt.

Tina has just emerged from the bathroom, damp hair kinking into waves as she rubs it dry, when another car pulls up outside and Pam is calling, "Blaine, Tina, come down, that's the guest of honour!"

"One of your awful stepsiblings turned on a tap while I was in the shower, I got frozen and then scalded," Tina whines as they walk down the stairs, the tips of her heels sinking into the thick carpet. Kissing her temple, Blaine holds out an arm for her and she laughs as she gently takes his elbow. "Why, Mr. Anderson, what will people think of us showing up for dinner together?"

Cooper and Natalie are both already sitting at the dinner table, looking sour-faced as if they've been sucking on lemons for hours, and Blaine gives them both a polite bob of his head, while Tina looks openly hostile. No sooner have the two of them sat down than Pam scuttles in with an absolutely gorgeous man behind her, looking stunning in tight jeans and a grey jumper falling off one shoulder, cheeks flushed pink and eyes guarded. "I thought we were meeting your dad's boyfriend," Tina hisses. "Is this another kid from his first marriage none of you knew about before?

"Maybe right before the divorce he had an affair with some absolutely gorgeous woman and made  _that_ ," Blaine hisses back to her, only half-joking.

The man's eyes alight on him, and he smiles, making Blaine's heart skip a beat as a glow lifts his eyes. "You must be Blaine," he says sweetly. "Your mother's been telling me that you're one of the most handsome men in the world."

Blaine smiles back, and catches Tina's jaw dropping out of the corner of his eye. "Oh my God...but he can't be-"

"Sorry, I was sitting in the car trying to find the courage to come in here," Walter says as he rushes in, leaning over to kiss Pam's cheek and sliding an arm around the disturbingly gorgeous man. "I'm sure Pam's told you I've been a nervous wreck all day. I don't know what I would've done without you kicking me out, darling." He smiles, and Pam grins back, blowing him a teasing kiss.

"You'd never cope without me, darling, it's a good thing we got married when we did," she replies, and Blaine rearranges his expression to hide his smirk at Cooper and Natalie's increasingly stormy expressions. "Aren't you going to introduce the kids?"

"Cooper, Natalie, Blaine, Tina, I want you all to meet Kurt Hummel," Walter says, and there's light in his eyes when he looks at Kurt, a comfort and companionship in the way Kurt leans gently into him. "Kurt, these are my two kids from my first marriage, Cooper and Natalie, my stepson, Blaine, and his friend, Tina."

Weak smiles and faint greetings are exchanged, and only after Kurt has sat down does Cooper give his father a sour glare and say, "Honestly, Dad, I never had you pegged for some cradle-snatching pervert. How old is he?"

"'He' is right here and can hear everything you're saying," Kurt says, and Blaine stares at him, lost in admiration. "First of all, what two consenting adults choose to do together is none of your business - it doesn't make a damn bit of difference if you're related to either. Second, I was the one who asked your father out in the first place. Third, I'm twenty-one. How old are you?"

Cooper's mouth is set in a straight line of disapproval, and Blaine can see both of his parents struggling to hide their laughter. Tina is openly snorting next to him, ignoring Natalie's glaring. "I'm thirty," Cooper answers, trying to sound haughty.

"Oh, how nice for you," Kurt says, the cheerfulness in his voice colder than ice. "I hope I don't have as many wrinkles as you when I get to your age. I don't think the make-up artists on that commercial you're still starring in do a very good job making you look twenty-five."

Grinning, Tina stage-whispers, "I like this guy," and Kurt winks at her. Blaine has to stare very hard at the table to stop himself from grinning, and there's a full minute of silence before Tina loudly says, "So, how have you all been? Since Blaine and I took off to LA for spring break, I haven't seen anyone since January! How are things?"

The conversation is stilted, slow and awkward, and Blaine spends most of the stretched out silences gazing at Kurt across the table. He looks uncomfortable, not like the calming, sweet man that Pam told him many times was utterly adorable. Privately, Blaine blames Cooper and Natalie, sitting like twin thunderclouds and gazing at Kurt with nothing short of complete hatred. Right on cue,  _Don't Rain On My Parade_  starts to ring out of Kurt's phone, and he flushes, scrambling to turn it off. "Sorry about that, one of my friends is getting married in Indiana next month and my other friend is trying to organise it and getting into a lot of screaming matches with the mothers of the brides," he says softly. "This food is fantastic, Ms. Anderson."

"How many times, Kurt, my name is Pam," she says, smiling at him and managing to glare at Cooper and Natalie. "Let's all go outside, it's a beautiful evening and we'll feel better without sitting around the table."

"I think we're going to head back to the hotel," Natalie says sharply, clattering her cutlery down, food barely touched. "C'mon, Coop." They walk out together, and the tension scattered like a veil over the evening lifts.

"How can people raised by you and Lorraine possibly turn out like  _that_?" Kurt asks as soon as the sound of an engine is a distant rumble on the warm evening, and Walter laughs, moving closer to him. Blaine gazes at him with wide eyes - it's odd, seeing his father being so openly, freely affectionate with someone who isn't his mother.

"They were both screwed up by the divorce, they've never forgiven either of us for ending up with other people and not getting married again," Walter answers, and sweeps them all outside. The evening is warm, a gentle breeze tugging on the trees, and the conversation is easier without the glaring.

Tugging on Blaine's arm, Tina pulls him over to the tall, wide oak tree and they climb up into the treehouse, sitting on the edge with legs swinging. "We'll leave the grown-ups to their boring conversation, and now we can gossip," she says, winking from behind her sunglasses. "Did you hear that Sugar's dad sent her over to Paris for the holidays? Apparently she's already charmed some author into showing her the sights."

"Kurt's only two years older than us, Tay," Blaine reminds her, watching the trio from above. Kurt looks content now, the sun bringing a flush to his cheeks, curled happily into Walter. The grey jumper has been abandoned, leaving him in just his jeans and a black tank top - his arms are  _gorgeous_ , almost better than those of the gym manager Blaine has been coveting from afar since Christmas.

"He's dating your dad, that automatically makes him a grown-up," Tina says with a dismissive wave of her hand, sipping on her precariously balanced glass of lemonade. "Although he's absolutely stunning, I'm very jealous. Where can I pick up a man like that?"

"You've got Artie," Blaine reminds him with a sly dig into her ribs, and she smirks.

"Not until July, he's gone out to LA for this festival he's entered a short film into," she says, tucking her skirt under her thighs and kicking off her heels, watching them fall onto the grass below. "Besides, he's never minded me looking. He knows I love him and I'll be faithful." Turning to him with an unnerving gleam in her eyes, she says, "Okay, I have a man like that. Where can we find  _you_  a man like that?"

Rolling his eyes, Blaine jumps down from the tree, ignoring Tina laughing above him, and wanders across the garden to refill his glass. Perched nervously on the edge of his chair, Kurt gives him a small smile, the setting sun warming his pale skin and illuminating his eyes. "Are you okay?" Blaine asks, settling into the empty chair and waving Tina down from the treehouse.

"Pam says Walter was nervous, but I barely slept last night," Kurt says, and Blaine looks at him with a small smile pulling at the corners of his mouth. "Honestly - ask Santana, the friend who's getting married. Her fiancée called me at two am having a crisis and I talked to both of them and accidentally told Britt I hadn't been to bed."

"I know Cooper and Natalie are awful, but from what I've been told my dad's been trying really hard to get them to come around," Blaine says bracingly.

"I know, but I never thought I'd ever be in the position to be meeting my boyfriend's kids, two of whom are older than me," Kurt says quietly, glancing at Walter and Pam to make sure neither of them are listening. "I'm not saying I don't have feelings for Walter, or think that we shouldn't be together - it's everyone else that feels like that. My friends have all been raising eyebrows at me since we met, and I've only taken him to meet my dad and my stepmom once - they were both just so horrified to think that I'm dating someone older than both of them."

"I'll admit, Tina and I weren't expecting you," Blaine says, and then hastens to add, "But you seem like a lovely person, my dad clearly likes you and you stood up to Cooper," when Kurt's face falls.

Finally, Kurt smiles, and Blaine almost wishes he hadn't said anything to make it happen. Kurt looks far too irresistible when his eyes light up and his cheeks go pink with pleasure. "I don't think I earned myself any brownie points insulting your stepbrother."

"Are you kidding me, it's the best thing you could've done to make me like you," Blaine says, and Kurt laughs. "Cooper and Natalie have always been awful to my mom, and to me, and to Virginia - she's my dad's first wife's daughter with her new partner. They'll never forgive us for being confirmation that Dad and Lorraine aren't going to get back together." Tapping his fingers against his thigh, searching for another topic of conversation, he finally asks, "Do you go to college?"

"NYADA," Kurt says, and smiles at Blaine's impressed look. "But I've taken a year out - personal reasons. Hopefully I'll be going back in the fall. What about you?"

"NYU, I didn't get into NYADA," Blaine says, and sees the sympathy flicker across Kurt's face. "Tina and I have an apartment together. It's tiny, but that's New York for you." Filling a glass from the iced tea jug, he says, "And continuing our game of twenty questions, how did you meet my dad?"

"Rachel and Santana flew over from New York for a weekend to take me out for my twenty-first, and we ended up at Scandals," Kurt says, and Blaine watches him, his long fingers tracing the rim of his glass as he speaks, the small smile pulling at the corners of his mouth, his eyes softening and gaze darting towards Walter. "Santana was supposed to be driving, but we all got pretty drunk, and I ended up getting separated from them and going outside because I was too hot inside. Walter pulled into the parking lot and found me sitting on the sidewalk by myself, staring at my feet. He ended up driving us all home, and he gave me his number and I called him once the hangover cleared. We've been together ever since." Shaking off the nostalgic shine in his eyes, he asks, "And you? Is there someone in your life?"

"Broke up with my boyfriend last summer, we were only fooling around anyway," Blaine answers easily - the sting has long since faded. Him and Dave are friends now. "Tina will tell you I've had a crush on the manager of our local gym for ages, but don't believe her. I've seen his girlfriend anyway."

Kurt smiles at him, relaxing a little back into his chair. "I really like your parents," he confides softly. "Pam's been so sweet to me - I expected her to be bitter about me being the first person Walter's gotten serious with since their divorce."

"Oh, Pam's never been one to hold a grudge," Tina says, wandering over to join them, and Blaine pushes down the spike of anger that she's interrupting his time alone with Kurt.  _He's dating your dad, you idiot_. "Blaine's bio-dad fucked off after she found out she was pregnant, but she still friended him on Facebook and keeps him updated on Blaine's life, even after he's married someone else and had other kids. I'm sure she'd forgive Cooper and Natalie for being the stepchildren from hell if they didn't give her constant ammunition."

"I'm glad you and my dad are together," Blaine says over Tina, who glares at him even as she perches on the arm of his chair. If he says it enough times, maybe he'll stop his heart skipping a beat every time Kurt smiles or their eyes meet. "After him and my mom called to tell me why they were getting divorced, the thought of him denying who he is for all these years made me so sad for him. He needs someone like you."

Kurt flushes again, the pink stealing up his neck, and Blaine finds himself staring at the way it stains his collarbones, dragging his eyes up the pale neck to notice the freckles like faint stars scattered across his cheeks and the bridge of his nose.  _Shut up, Blaine_. "Well, if I have the approval of the ex-wife and the stepson, maybe I really am good enough," he says quietly. "Does this mean you won't mind me staying over tonight?"

"Of course not, it's a huge house," Blaine says, waving up at his room from the garden, the tiny balcony looking out towards the treehouse. "Cooper and Natalie always turn down the offers for rooms when they visit and stay in hotels instead. Tina's staying over tonight, she's practically a member of the family and she's been dying to meet the guy who's made my dad blush like a schoolboy."

"I heard that!" Walter shouts from where him and Pam are sitting, and Tina laughs, then starts tugging at Blaine's arm.

"C'mon, Blainey Days, I want to watch  _Moulin Rouge_  and still have time to call Artie before bed without him noticing I've been crying over the ending again," she says, and then smiles charmingly at Kurt and says, "My boyfriend, he's in LA for a short film festival. He goes to the Brooklyn Film Academy and lives with Blaine and I."

"It was nice to meet you," Kurt says quietly, and then Tina is dragging Blaine up the stairs to his room, taking off her make-up in his mirror while he slots the DVD into the player and slumps into a beanbag chair, the familiar haunting opening melody sounding by the time Tina sits down, changed into her pyjamas with her hair tied back.

"Isn't Kurt gorgeous?" she gushes suddenly, and Blaine nods non-committally, unwilling to admit how jolted he is by seeing his fifty year old father with someone so close to his own age, and so beautiful. "I need to send a picture to Artie, he's always saying young handsome leading men are like gold dust these days. He's been outlining his dream short film about a young gay couple's journey through life - maybe you and Kurt could play the couple."

"I refuse to be the Johnny Depp to Artie's Tim Burton," Blaine says firmly, and she giggles, dragging her beanbag closer and curling into him. "Dad looks really happy, and Mom clearly likes Kurt. Kurt's sweet, he seemed so nervous to meet us."

"He must like your dad then," Tina observes, talking over the lines written on their hearts from endlessly watching  _Moulin Rouge_  while Artie complained in the background. "If he was just playing around, he wouldn't be so nervous to meet his boyfriend's kids. Nice for your dad to have someone serious."

Tina falls asleep before the end of the film, tears still glittering on her cheeks from singing loudly along to  _Come What May_. Easing her down onto the mattress and pulling the blankets over her, smiling affectionately, Blaine snaps a picture and sends it to Artie before he strips down to his tank top and boxers - sharing an apartment with Tina for a year has stopped them having any semblance of modesty around each other.

Eyes itching with tiredness, he goes to lock the doors onto the balcony and close the curtains, but looks out onto the garden first, the moon and stars in a clear sky making everything seem ethereal in the silvery glow. Pam must've gone inside, but Kurt and Walter are still there, standing and talking. As he watches, Walter takes Kurt's glass from his hand and kisses him, and Kurt's arms slide around his neck. In the night, they could be any couple, whispering and in love, and Blaine's heart twists with loneliness as he yanks the curtains shut with more violence than necessary.


	3. The Visions Of You And I

Wandering barefoot and yawning into the kitchen, idly pushing a hand through his messy bedhead, Blaine briefly thinks he's still dreaming - or has died in his sleep and gone to heaven - when he's confronted by a gorgeous man wearing only striped pyjama pants and a robe hanging open across his chest. Then reality quickly hits when Kurt lets out a squeak of horror and rushes to tie the cord tightly around his waist, while Blaine stares open-mouthed and wide-eyed. "Sorry, I'm so sorry, I thought I'd be the only one awake," he says hastily, a blush creeping up his neck and into his cheeks, eyes cast down in embarrassment.

"Don't worry," Blaine manages to force out with an encouraging smile, entire body still whispering  _Oh my God he's_ _ **devastating**_. "You've got nothing to be ashamed of." Kurt blushes even deeper, but he smiles and lifts his gaze to meet Blaine's.

"I'm just used to not wearing much to bed, Rachel and Santana got used to it," he says apologetically.

"It's easy to forget Tina and I are even here," Blaine soothes him, taking a glass down from the shelf and filling it with ice with a noisy rattling.

"I have been staying quite a lot," Kurt admits softly. "You know what it's like at the start of a new relationship, you want to spend all your time together and my parents aren't exactly sold on Walter, so we've been spending a lot of time here. Pam's such an angel, she doesn't mind."

"Well get used to company when you come down, I'm an early riser," Blaine says, and Kurt smiles softly at him. "And a voluntary one. Tina loves it, her and Artie can sleep an extra twenty minutes in the morning and wake up to breakfast already made for them. Every morning."

"Wow, want to live with me next year?" Kurt asks, and Blaine laughs as he opens the fridge, smiling at the two orange juice bottles side-by-side - Walter likes pulp, Pam can't stand it. It's familiar. "My roommates spend at least thirty minutes every morning fighting over who gets the first shower, the one that doesn't win goes sulking back to bed and then they fight about who hid whose muesli mixture." Shaking his head, he says, "I love them, but they're hellish to live with. Maybe without me they'll have found a way to cope with each other." Hearing the wistful affection in his voice, Blaine nudges closer to him under the guise of getting a pan from the cupboard.

They cook breakfast side by side, handing each other knives and spatulas, and it feels shockingly domestic. Caught up in the maybe fantasy of being able to press Kurt back against the counter and lean up to kiss him, eyes misting over when he thinks about undoing the tight knot bobbing with every movement, Blaine is stunned back to reality when Kurt starts as a pair of arms slide around from behind, laughing as Walter tugs him closer and kisses his shoulder. "Good morning," he murmurs, and Blaine can't help the spike of jealousy, followed almost immediately by the joy at seeing his father so happy. Love seems to have made him younger somehow, eyes bright and face softened with a smile.

" _Good morning, good morning!"_  Tina sings loudly as she walks in, already fully-dressed in bright colours and tying a bright yellow ribbon around the end of her ponytail, beaming at Kurt. "It's already a lovely day, let's take breakfast outside, Blaine!"

But Blaine is watching Kurt turn around in Walter's arms and kiss him softly, conscious of the other people in the room. "So what are your plans today?" he asks sweetly, hands running gently up Walter's arms to his shoulders. "I've been looking forward to a lazy morning, then there's a lunch with Santana and Brittany's parents for the lucky wedding party, and I managed to get San to agree that I could bring to you."

"Kurt, sweetheart, I'd love to, but I have to work," Walter says, and Kurt's face falls, a shadow casting over his eyes. "You know I want to get to know your friends, but I need to wrap up some loose ends so I can take July off and spend time with everyone. There'll be other lunches for me to come to."

"I guess," Kurt says, but all the shine has gone from him, and he disappears back upstairs with his black coffee, the sound of the door closing dramatic in the tense silence. Shovelling his and Tina's food onto plates, Blaine ducks outside before the moment grows any more awkward, the dry grass tickling his bare feet and the sun already warming the ground.

"Wow, trouble in paradise," Tina says, taking a seat and putting her feet up in Blaine's lap, curling a lock of hair around her fingers. "I wouldn't think anyone would get so upset about something like that. Kurt seems like he's really sure of your dad, probably loves him."

"Everyone has hang-ups when they're in relationships, Tay," Blaine says, tipping her feet off and ignoring her affronted squawk. "For instance, I worry about actually being in one because Dave and I weren't exactly serious and I don't know how things would be if I was serious about someone. I might find out I can't commit. You've got one too, I'm sure."

"Always worried that Artie would forget about me with his career, but given that I had seven texts from him when I woke up, I doubt it," she says, and stretches luxuriously, wiggling her toes. "What are we going to do today?"

"You have to go home at some point," Blaine reminds her, and can't help but laugh at the disappointment that crosses her face. "I'm going to unpack everything properly and then email Six Flags to see if they have any free performance spots for the summer."

"God, you are so grown-up and boring," Tina says, rolling her eyes. "Can't you even take a week off? Your need to be constantly busy worries me. It'll make you go grey early, you know." Smacking at her legs and making her squeal, Blaine turns when he hears the door open and close again to see Kurt heading towards them, now dressed in a pale grey T-shirt with  _NEW YORK ACADEMY FOR THE DRAMATIC ARTS_ splashed across the chest in bright red and the tightest jeans Blaine has ever seen on anyone. His heart starts to beat a little faster, and he hastily looks down at his food.

"Do either of you want to come to this wedding party lunch with me?" he asks, leaning on the table and smiling down, looking for all the world like some untouchable model straight off the runway with his long legs stretched out in front of him and hair falling in his eyes in the sunlight. "I know I could go alone, but San's dragging her feet about invitations and I think if I take one of Walter's family along she'll invite you all."

"Count me out, Artie promised to Skype when he has a free moment and I actually need to go home today, if only to catch up with my parents before coming back here," Tina says, brushing crumbs off her skirt. "Blaine will go, then he can't be boring and grown-up on our first day back at home."

Flushing and giving her a glare, Blaine gulps to wet his dry throat when he looks up into Kurt's hopeful smile. "Will you really come?" he asks sweetly, a note of desperation creeping into his voice. "It's only Breadstix, you don't have to dress up at all, but I'm sure if Santana meets you and sees how wonderful you are she'll invite you to the wedding. She might even grant you a plus one - though I'd be desperately jealous of anyone who managed to hook someone as lovely as you." He winks then, and Blaine wonders for a second if he'll ever breathe again, with this extraordinarily gorgeous man actually flirting with him.

"What time is the table booked for, and how many people are going?" he asks softly, and he sees the way Kurt's eyes light up, ignoring the voice deep inside him that begins to whisper about how bad an idea this is, about everything that could go wrong, about how many people stand to get hurt if he chases the feelings that are making his heart pound and the blush creep gently up his neck.

Smiling now, looser than before, pale limbs and bright eyes and slender waist, Kurt says, "Booked for two, and there won't be too many people there. Santana and her mom, Brittany and her parents, Rachel and her boyfriend, Jesse, Quinn and her boyfriend, Noah, and me. Nothing overwhelming, they're all very friendly, and the screaming matches are reserved for times outside of the public eye."

Glancing at Tina out of the corner of his eye, Blaine sees her give him a barely perceptible nod, and a  _Go and get him_  gesture of her head. Refraining from rolling his eyes at her, he looks up at Kurt - momentarily dazzled - and says, "I'd love to. Give me time to shower and change and fix my hair, though, I don't want your friends thinking you want them to invite some scruffy guy to their wedding."

"As if you could look like anything but a man straight out of classic Hollywood, Blaine," Kurt says, and ruffles his hair gently before he darts away, back into the house. Eyes glued to his gently swaying hips, Blaine doesn't notice Tina tugging on his arm until she pulls a little too hard and iced tea sloshes out of his glass onto his arm, prompting him to turn around and finally notice her wide eyes.

"Is he  _hitting_  on you?!" she asks in a loud, scandalised whisper. "You can't encourage him! He's your dad's boyfriend, it's wrong on so many levels! I want to go to a wedding with my handsome boyfriend on my arm as much as the next girl, but not if it comes at a price of you flirting with someone who is extremely taken!"

Brushing crumbs off his shirt, Blaine simply replies, "You know a lot of naturally flirtatious people, Tina. I think that Kurt is just flirty by nature, he's not doing it because it's me specifically. I saw him and my dad kissing last night - I know they're in love." Waving a hand vaguely around, as if trying to snatch the words from the air, he finally says, "It was like watching two characters in a film kiss for the first time when you hadn't thought of them together before, and then when their lips meet you just get it. Besides, I saw the expression on Kurt's face when my dad said he couldn't go to this lunch - you don't look like that if you're only in it casually."

"Okay, but don't dress up too nicely, or I'll start a gossip chain that will quickly wind its way around our friends," Tina says sternly, and Blaine is certain that she isn't joking. Luckily, she can't see the way his heart jumps and his breath catches in his throat when Kurt breezes out onto the lawn again, face softened by love with Walter's guiding arm around his waist. It seems like the world was made only for them, the lovers, as they smile into each other's eyes in that secretive way that only comes of love.

Blaine finds himself watching them, wondering what he's missed out on in years past without the dizzying experience of a first love, without dating someone who made his eyes light up with wheeling fireworks, without the sort of love where a look could move mountains. Dave was nice, they had fun together, they lost their virginities to each other and shared blushing, nervous experiences in dark back seats, but that wasn't love and they both knew it. Blaine knows he wasn't the only one to breathe a sigh of relief when their relationship melted back into friendship as easily as it had boiled into romance.

But to have never experienced what his father now has, with someone as beautiful and sweet and striking as Kurt - it clenches at his heart like an icy fist, reminding him that he hasn't kissed someone since breaking up with Dave, that it's been too long since he felt the swoop of desire in his stomach, that his mind is wound so tightly around the idea of being in love that perhaps he'll never truly feel it.

Finishing breakfast, Blaine dodges inside and drags Tina with him despite her protests, leaving the happy couple on the lawn alone, to be freely affectionate and love each other. Thoughts twisting like snakes around each other, Blaine turns the shower on until it roars and drives out all other sound, letting the pounding water scald away the pleasing hum of want beneath his skin and the whispering malevolent thoughts haunting him, stepping out of the shower and humming to himself as he briskly towels himself dry and pads along to his room.

In the hour it takes to style his hair and choose an outfit, he glances out of the window exactly twelve times, and each time sees Kurt and Walter closer than they were before, culminating in catching a split-second glimpse of them kissing once again. As he angles his mirror so he can knot his bowtie - black, patterned with silver music notes, a gift from Lorraine when he was accepted to NYU - he can't help but wonder what kissing Kurt would be like, a wandering of his mind. Though he tells himself it's the same as thinking what it would feel like to kiss Adam Levine or a cute waiter in a restaurant, it's really,  _really_  not.

Thinking innocently about kissing a celebrity or a stranger is fun. If thinking about Kurt's soft lips against his and the way he would gasp so sweetly and the splintered whimper that would drop from his swollen lips as Blaine parted them with his tongue and his long fingers clutching and threading into Blaine's hair was innocent...if it was nothing more than a cool consideration of the possibilities of a physical relationship with someone he finds attractive, that would be okay. But it's not, because his heart shifts and his fingers tremble, and he knows that this could be so much deeper than the physical if he lets himself fall any further.

Kurt stares at him with wide eyes and an incredulous smile when he finally joins them in the kitchen, where Tina is swinging her legs perched on the counter and chattering nineteen to the dozen, waving her hands wildly to illustrate a point. As those eyes slowly drag up his body, Blaine fights down the blush and wonders what it is about tight grey jeans and the simple white polo that makes Kurt's eyes go dark like that. "I'm honoured to be showing up to the lunch with someone as lovely as you," he says softly, and Blaine blushes, feeling his cheeks go hot as Kurt laughs softly, a huffed breath of merriment. "I just have to change my shirt, okay? Can't go to lunch with the parents of those I'm going to be managing the big day of dressed like a slob."

The moment Kurt vanishes upstairs with a swing of his hips in those jeans - so tight they're like a second skin,  _Jesus_  - Walter takes Blaine by the shoulder, eyes earnest and face set. "Thank you for going with him," he says, and Blaine just nods, helpless to say anything. "I don't know all the details, but Kurt's been burned badly before, and I'm the first man he's gotten serious with since. You have no idea how big this is for me, Blaine. I'm so glad you're accepting of this."

"Sure, Dad," Blaine says with a smile, and Walter looks down at him with a kind of wistfulness in his gaze before he breaks away. Checking his phone constantly, Blaine finally smiles when Kurt sweeps back into the kitchen, his deep green shirt unbuttoned just enough to draw attention to his long neck and a silvery-grey neckerchief tied neatly. Glancing at his neck, Blaine wonders if he's just imagining the shadow of a lovebite, and covers the silence by loudly saying, "We better go if we have to be there by two. I really am excited to meet your friends."

"Oh honey, they'll love you," Kurt says, and links an arm through Blaine's, the corner of his mouth twisted up in a smirk. "You're a charmer." Car keys jingling where they're hooked into his waistband, Kurt leans over to kiss Walter, perhaps a little deeper than he should in polite company. "I'll call you later, babe. Love you."

It's so easy, as Walter replies, "Love you too," and Kurt tugs Blaine out of the house. Settling into Kurt's car, Blaine gazes at the scenery drifting lazily past, trying to avoid eye contact. Kurt has disturbed him, stirred him up, and he feels like he could boil over, just with proximity. He can smell Kurt's sharp cologne, the hairspray, see the sharply-ironed creases in his shirt.

He thanks whatever deity is listening for small mercies when Kurt plugs in his iPod to fill the empty silence, listening to the clicking of him perusing the selection until he finally pauses and smiles. "I hope you like showtunes," he says sweetly, and the familiar opening notes of  _No Good Deed_  fill the car. Smiling, Blaine rolls the window down and lets the breeze carry him away, listening to Kurt's crystal clear voice finding every note, in awe of such a blazing talent burning like the sun right in front of him. NYADA is truly lucky to have him.

When they pull into the Breadstix parking lot, Blaine is shortly overwhelmed by Kurt's friends. Four women all crowd around him as soon as he gets out of the car, throwing their arms around him as if they haven't seen each other for months. Introductions leave him reeling - Rachel is the tiny brunette in a short skirt, who kisses his cheek and leaves lipstick behind. Quinn is the blonde holding the hand of the man with a mohawk, who waves and smiles. Brittany is the frazzled-looking blonde curling a lock of hair around her fingers, who hugs him and thanks him for coming in a slightly strained voice. Santana is the most glamorous, dangerous-looking, and her eyes sweep over him and she smirks as he says, "I need your boyfriend's plastic surgeon's number, Hummel. A miracle has been performed."

"Don't be a bitch," Kurt snaps, and Santana actually withdraws. "This is Blaine, Walter's stepson. Walter is working today, so Blaine agreed to come with me. I thought if you actually met some of Walter's family, you'd stop digging your heels in about inviting them. They can round out the numbers."

The table waiting for them is spread along the back of the restaurant, and Blaine shakes hands with the parents of the two brides - they all smile at him and comment on his good looks, casting unreadable glances at Kurt. Once they've ordered, the conversation quickly turns to the wedding, and Blaine absorbs it all like a sponge. He watches Santana and Brittany, the way they sit so close and tangled their fingers gently. The ring Brittany is wearing is simple and elegant, and Blaine thinks about how it might look if he was wearing a ring like that, given by someone he could truly love. His thoughts flit towards Kurt, and then away again. He can't have feelings for Kurt, or he'll just torture himself.

Kurt drops him home after the lunch, and Blaine is reeling as Kurt hugs him, lips brushing gently against his cheek and arms tight around him, comforting. "Thank you," he says softly. "I didn't want to go alone. You saw Santana and Brittany, and Rachel and Jesse, and Quinn and Puck. They're all so happy, I can't bear to be the one who isn't. They'll all be whispering now, talking about trouble in paradise and how I should never have gone out with someone so much older in the first place. Of all the  _fucking_  things to talk about-"

"Kurt," Blaine murmurs, and gently strokes Kurt's back, feeling his spine shifting, bending into the touch. "Calm down. People are going to judge you everywhere you go, but you can ignore them. You don't have to listen to what they say."

"I know." Kurt's voice sounds choked, as if he's about to cry or laugh, and Blaine's heart drops like a stone to hear it. "But you don't understand what it's like. All my friends are whispering behind my back, talking about the bad decisions I'm making. I can't take my boyfriend to stay at my house, because my parents stare and look at each other and they worry that I'm being taken advantage of. No one understands, they all think I'm making a huge mistake."

"You're not," Blaine assures him firmly, and Kurt moves back, looking at him with huge, wet eyes. "My dad has never been anything but loving and sweet towards my mom, and I know just from looking at the two of you how he feels about you. He's an amazing man, and I know you love him. You have to ignore what they say and just live in the moment, have this experience for yourself. If you love my dad, you can make it work."

"Oh, Blaine, honey," Kurt says, and his voice is choked now, a barely noticeable quiver at the corner of his mouth. "You're so naive."


	4. And Everything Has Changed

**Warning:** some slutshaming in this chapter

* * *

When he was younger, Blaine was never used to seeing affectionate couples in the house. His parents, though clearly in love, were never much for constant public displays of affection. To anyone Cooper or Natalie brought home, he was just the bratty little stepbrother, and their dates looked right through him as if he wasn't even there. It wasn't until his friends at Dalton started dating that he spent time around couples, and became familiar with the party staple of being perched on the end of a couch while his friends made out with their significant others next to him. When he started dating Dave, they went through a phase of being very affectionate with each other, and there was a certain satisfaction in getting his own back on Tina after she'd laughed at his complaining about her and Artie.

Still, even all the experience of affectionate couples hasn't prepared him for the mornings he'll wander into the kitchen for breakfast and find it already occupied. With his holiday job performing at Six Flags - Tina is joining him to fill the days until Artie comes home from LA, despite her complaints about performing in the heat - he spends less and less time at home, and apparently Kurt and Walter are taking full advantage of having the house to themselves as Pam heads out to visit her parents in Washington.

It pulls at Blaine's heart, every time he sees the happy couple together. They're not shy about being physical with each other - it's rare to see them in the same room and not holding hands or curled up together. Kurt always looks so blissful, and Blaine smiles seeing him like that, eyes soft with love and hair falling in his face, half asleep. It starts to creep into his dreams, imagining holding Kurt, feeling his soft skin and his warmth, running fingers through his thick hair and hearing him whispering tender words. But, of course, he's not jealous of his own father. It's just a silly schoolboy crush, and when he's more occupied with his friends he'll get over it, and then they'll be separated come September and the start of a new school year. He's gotten over plenty of crushes in his time.

Besides, he's become friends with Kurt. While Walter is at work, frantically trying to wrap everything up so he can justify taking the entire month of July off to spend more time at home with his family, he spends his days off with Kurt, enjoying his company. It's mostly wedding planning as the day creeps closer and closer, sometimes with Kurt's other friends, people he went to school with. It amazes Blaine that they've all managed to stay in touch with such a large group - he hardly talks to any of the Warblers anymore other than the occasional Facebook exchange when something big happens in one of their lives, and it's only been a year since he left high school.

"It might come back," Quinn says one afternoon when they're in her back garden. It's just the three of them in the quiet afternoon, and while Kurt is out for dinner Blaine found himself telling Quinn all of his worries about old friendships. "But sometimes you find you were only friends with people because you saw them five days a week - and you were at boarding school, so that's even more time spent together. If you don't want to be lonely and miserable, you make friends. We've stuck together because we went through so much, and it was really difficult at times. I've been supported through so much by all of them. Obviously, there are groups of closer friends within the group, but we're all friends. I could pick up the phone any time, day or night, and someone would be there to help me. Glee club is family."

"It never felt like that with the Warblers," Blaine admits, refilling his glass with the last of the lemonade. "We weren't really a family, we all just liked to perform and spent time together because of that. There was never any major drama that we all had to work through together."

"New Directions had to fight every step of the way just to keep our slice of the school budget," Quinn says with a laugh. "We've had more than our fair share of drama - break-ups, sexuality crises, cheating, pregnancy, weddings." Blaine knows his eyes go wide, and Quinn laughs again. "The pregnancy was me in sophomore year. The sexuality crises have been a couple of people, and sometimes it made being in the choir room all together really awkward. But we've sorted ourselves out now. The couples who are together now have been for a while."

"When you guys all talk about each other I wonder if I'll be uncomfortable at the wedding, with you all having gone to high school together and being such good friends," Blaine says. "I mean, Tina and Artie and Dave and I have no connection to any of you aside from the fact that Kurt's dating my dad."

"Please, they're serious about each other, it's not exactly a superficial connection," Quinn says with an airy wave of her hand. "You won't feel uncomfortable, we didn't all go to high school together. People have slipped in along the way through other means - Jesse only came in last year as Rachel's boyfriend. Elliott and Dani - you'll meet them at the wedding - are friends of Kurt's from New York, and they crept in and now she's dating Madison. I'm sure things can be the same for you and your friends."

"We all sing," Blaine says with a shrug, and Quinn grins. "I guess we can perform with you guys if nothing else." He remembers a heated argument about whether there would be a karaoke machine and permission to perform at the wedding - in the end, Santana had to admit that it was far more cost-effective to have their friends performing than to hire professionals. A few of the friends - those in college training in performing arts, or Mercedes, who has a recording contract out in LA - took serious offence to that. "There are just so many of you, it gets confusing."

"As long as you can keep the bridal party straight, you'll get through fine," Quinn reassures him, reaching for another biscuit. "I'll be the first to admit it's difficult for new people who come into our group to get to know everyone. Especially since people like to mess with newbies by pretending to be each other. Dani used to get really frustrated about Sam and Mike messing with her, but they thought it was so funny. The couples will help you keep names straight too - we won't even bother telling you how many different pairings there have been in our pasts."

"Why do none of you support Kurt's relationship with my dad?" The words are out before Blaine can swallow them back, and he blushes immediately, worrying that he's made Quinn uncomfortable. "Quinn, I'm sorry, I didn't mean it like that. It's just some things Kurt said to me after the first time I met you about your feelings. It's none of my business."

"Does Kurt really feel that bad about the things we say?" Quinn asks, and Blaine nods slightly. "God, I feel like a bitch. I don't mean to make Kurt feel like we don't support him, or we hate Walter. It's just...weird." Blaine stares at her, gaze hard, and she sighs. "Kurt was the last one of us to date anyone - there wasn't exactly a huge pool of queer guys at our school. He used to get so excited about being in love, the sort of person who'd sigh at couples and imagine years with anyone he found attractive. Maybe he's still a bit of a hopeless romantic, but he went through a horrible relationship that put his feet firmly on the ground. I'm not going to tell you the details, that's Kurt's business. Walter's the first guy he's gotten serious with since that break-up, and that was before he started college. We're being overprotective, but we worry about Kurt getting his heart broken again."

"You don't have to," Blaine says sharply. "My dad's crazy about him. He thinks he's the most amazing person in the world."

"Who is?" The voice makes them both jump, and Blaine sees the guilt flood into Quinn's eyes as he wanders back to his seat and sets down the takeaway bags from Breadstix, diving in for his pasta.

"You are!" she says, a little loudly, and Kurt laughs, blowing her a kiss. They both wait for the explosion, but Kurt gives no outward sign that he overheard anything else, and they can relax.

"So, Blaine, are you going to be taking advantage of the plus one your wedding invite came with?" he asks, licking sauce off his fingers. Distracted by the glimpses of his pink tongue, it takes Quinn loudly clearly her throat for Blaine to come back to earth.

"I wasn't sure what I wanted to do, but my ex is back in town visiting his dad around the same time as the wedding, so I asked if he wanted to come and meet some new people," Blaine says, shrugging. "We have a bit of a limited social circle."

"Your ex?" Quinn asks, arching an eyebrow. "You really want to bring an ex-boyfriend to a wedding? I mean, I know our group of friends has dated each other so much that we're regularly hanging out with our exes, but do you really want to do that?"

"It was a case of us just being better as friends than boyfriends," Blaine explains gently. "Dave and I dated for most of senior year, but that came out of friendship and bounced straight back. It was never true love or high school sweethearts or anything. It'll be nice for him to see me, Tina and Artie after we've all been away at college."

"I can't imagine only hanging out with three other people," Kurt says, helping himself to the new bottle of lemonade. "It wouldn't be the same." Glancing sideways at Blaine, he smiles and lightly says, "Although it's such a shame someone as amazing as you doesn't have a boyfriend to bring. Sure you won't get back together at the wedding?"

"No, it was properly over," Blaine says easily. "As far as I know he's been dating a lot since we broke up, and I've been working hard. We just never fell for each other in any real way."

"Well maybe you'll find someone from our friends," Quinn says, relaxing into her chair. "Everyone hooks up at weddings. I really used to think that was just a cliché, but two of our teachers got married when Santana and Brittany were on a break and I ended up sleeping with Santana at the reception." She smirks when Blaine chokes on his food, and Kurt laughs loudly. "I know. Kurt likes to bring it up if we ever annoy him to make us all embarrassed and quiet."

"I know that neither of you are ashamed you slept together, Quinn," Kurt says sternly. "You were so proud of yourself the next morning." While Quinn is smirking to herself, Blaine hears his phone vibrate against the table and reaches for it.

**From: Dad**

**I have to go pick your mom up from the airport, so I had to send Cooper and Natalie to pick you up. I'm sorry - Dad**

"Crap," Blaine sighs loudly, and leans out of his seat to hug Quinn. "I have to go, my dad's sent my stupid stepsiblings to pick me up. I'll see you guys soon."

"Kurt's parents are hosting a big get together for everyone next week, and that's when Mason and Jane are coming back from their post-freshman year month in Hawaii," Quinn says. "Didn't you say Tina's boyfriend is back then too?" Blaine nods as he shoves his feet into his shoes, and Quinn smiles. "Cool, bring them! They might as well start getting to know us."

Hugging Kurt goodbye, Blaine clings on just long enough to memorise the scent of his cologne, and smiles at him when he pulls away. "Tell your dad I'll come by to see him tomorrow," he says, and Blaine nods, ignoring the sinking feeling in his stomach. It's not fair to feel jealous.

"Blaine!" His heart sinks to see Cooper waiting outside with his car, clutching a cup of coffee and wearing a pair of wraparound sunglasses, clearly trying to look like a big movie star hailing from LA. Too bad he's only ever landed parts in commercials. "I've been lumbered with you because Dad's busy and your mom is still away visiting  _family_." His lip curls over the word, and Blaine smiles apologetically at Quinn and Kurt before he runs out of the peaceful garden.

"You know, my mom was married to Dad for eighteen years, you could at least call her by her name," Blaine snaps at his stepbrother as he climbs into the car to Natalie frostily ignoring him.

"They're not married anymore, squirt," Cooper snaps - just when he thought it couldn't get worse, there's the nickname from the days when he was a toddler running after his stepsiblings, wanting to play with them, crying when they'd kick up dust in his face and he'd trip trying to chase them.

The blissful silence only reigns for a few minutes before Natalie pipes up, "So, squirt, what did you think of the full story behind Dad leaving your mom? It's hilarious - at least when Dad left Mom it was because he loved her too much to trap her."

"That's not what happened," Blaine says through gritted teeth, trying to remember what the Dalton guidance counsellor told him all those years when school was the safe haven, away from the bullying and the prodding, pinching teasing from Cooper and Natalie. "Dad left Lorraine because they got married when they were seventeen and weren't in love anymore. He married Mom so she could keep her baby, and they fell in love."

"More's the pity," Natalie snorts, and Cooper laughs as Blaine raises his eyes to heaven and prays to whatever deity is listening that the journey home will be as short as possible. "Anyway, we heard the whole story because we came home to comfort Dad, instead of staying at boarding school and then taking off for college."

"Dalton was a demanding school, I couldn't just abandon my schoolwork and come home for weeks, and Mom and Dad told me not to defer my entry to NYU," Blaine says, finger ticking against the seat and irritation building hot in his chest, a brand against his ribs. "In case you haven't noticed, it was an amicable separation. They still live together and Mom loves Kurt."

"Dad talked all about how he woke up one morning and realised how trapped he was," Natalie says gleefully, clearly enjoying the story. Even though Blaine already knows it, probably better than either of them despite what they might say about returning home to support their father, the vindictive spin they put on it makes anger pulse in his blood. "He was trapped in a loveless marriage, and he got the divorce papers as soon as he could. I mean, thank God he finally walked out on the woman he only married because she got herself knocked up and he felt sorry for her. Your mom only ever wanted Dad's money - look at how they moved into a big house right after they got together. Look at how they had that big wedding. Mom and Dad got married in a courthouse."

"Because they were only eighteen and couldn't afford a big wedding," Blaine says, barely managing to keep his anger out of his voice. "Dad bought the bigger house because he wanted you two to be a part of his life with my mom. She never once tried to take him away from you."

"Can you imagine how humiliating that was for your poor mother, Blaine?" Cooper asks in that wheedling tone of voice he used to use for the nastiest teasing he could think of. "Her husband, the older man she paraded around like some sort of trophy, the respectable one, left her because he's gay. And you know the wonderful irony of the entire situation? He told us one night that it had been you coming out and bringing boys home that had made him think deeper about his sexuality. How does it feel to have been the one to ruin your parents' marriage, Blaine? To make Dad realise he married a twenty year old slut who just wanted a sugar daddy and fre babysitter?"

"You know what, Cooper? Fuck you!" Blaine shouts, and he can see the way Cooper just smirks in the rearview mirror. They always loved it when he fought back - it gave them reason enough to complain to Walter that he was being naughty. "Your parents had already matured out of their high school love by the time you were born! Mine loved each other for eighteen years, they still do! Mom was the true love of Dad's life, they were perfect together. His sexuality is irrelevant of how they felt about each other!"

"I bet Dad actually knew years ago," Natalie says, as if Blaine never even spoke. "I bet your mom was just a beard this whole time. Clinging on to him because she knew she couldn't get anyone else. Everyone knew about that guy who knocked her up and left straight away. Didn't he get married a month later? He just knew your mom was a slut. And she made a kid so inconsiderate he didn't even try to support his stepfather while he was going through a huge life change."

"Shut up about my mom!" Blaine snaps, fingers curling into fists. "All this stuff about you supporting Dad is bullshit. You were just happy that him and my mom split up, but you haven't even tried with Kurt. You just glare at him and you insult him and you question why Dad chose him. You just can't handle the idea that Dad and Lorraine are  _never_  going to get back together. You're just as horrible to Virginia and Trevor as you are to me and my mom!"

"And I don't even know why Dad's dating a college dropout," Cooper says, and Natalie laughs cruelly. "He says he's taking a year out, but I bet he got cut. I mean, as far as performing goes, I can't imagine him ever taking on anything better than a quirky sidekick."

"That's better than you've ever had," Blaine says through gritted teeth, but of course they act like he said nothing.

"I bet Kurt's just after Dad's money," Natalie says, and Blaine wonders if there's actually steam coming out of his ears, he's so angry. "I mean, his dad's a mechanic, I bet they struggle. Dad seems to have a thing for gold diggers."

The second they get back to the house, Blaine climbs out of the car, slamming the door hard and storming up to the house. Thank God, Pam is already there and offering him a cup of coffee. "Don't let them get to you," she says softly, putting an arm around him and enveloping him in her familiar scent. "They just want to make you rise. They're horrible people who find happiness in bullying you and saying horrible things about the new families their parents have found. It's just jealousy."

When Cooper and Natalie come inside, arms linked and smirks in place, Walter smiles around at them all and ushers them into the living room. Curling into his usual spot on the sofa, Blaine spots the secret in the smile his parents exchange, and sits up straight. This must be something serious. "Now, while I know we haven't all seen eye to eye over the years, I need all my children together for what I'm going to share with you all," he says, and Blaine smiles reassuringly, noticing how nervous he is in his hunched shoulders and cast-down gaze. "I've spent twenty years of my life married to women, and it's only recently that I've found out how much love I have to give a man. Kurt is one of the best things that has ever happened to me - he makes me feel young and he's changed my life for the better. You all know that I'm happy - even happier than I was when any of you were born, or when I married your mothers."

Pam puts a hand on Walter's arm, smiles at him, and Walter lifts his gaze to look at the trio of Andersons on the couch, Cooper and Natalie sitting stonily next to each other, and Blaine gazing curiously at his father. "I've spoken to Lorraine, and Pam, and to Kurt's father and stepmother, and each of them support my decision," he says slowly, and the seed of an idea plants itself in Blaine's mind, making his heart skip a beat and cold drip down his spine like water. "It's only been a few months, but when you get to my age you know when it's love, and between Kurt and I it is absolutely love." His face softens as he says, "I'm crazy about him. It's like being a teenager and falling in love for the first time all over again."

"What are you talking about, Dad?" Natalie asks. "Seriously, get to the point."

"Of course, pumpkin," Walter says, a slight edge to his voice, and Blaine and Pam both duck to hide their smiles at the way Natalie's mouth twists in disgust at the use of her childhood nickname. "What I'm saying is that I've made a huge decision that will affect each of you, and I only hope you'll support me. This isn't going to change anything. I'll always be your dad and I'll always love each of you."

He takes a deep breath, and something in Blaine breaks as he hears the words he knew were inevitable but somehow hoped were just his overactive imagination.

"I'm going to ask Kurt to marry me."

 


	5. Today And Every Day

The only benefit of the situation is that Walter doesn't want them to take part in some huge, elaborate proposal. While Blaine might privately have always dreamed of proposing to the love of his life in some incredible manner - possibly involving show choirs and falling rose petals - he's glad that his father wants the proposal to be something sweet, simple and sincere.

After Cooper and Natalie have gone storming back to their hotel, Blaine stays sitting with his parents, sipping silently at his coffee and listening to the conversation, giving weak smile whenever he's addressed. "I've never really been big on romance," Walter says, and Pam rolls her eyes fondly. "It's true! When I proposed to Lorraine I really did try to make it special, but eating take-away pizza in the park and proposing inside my car because it started raining isn't exactly a story you'd be proud to tell the grandkids. And Pam, when we got engaged it was less of a proposal and more of 'We're practically married already, let's just make it official'."

"I thought it was very romantic," Pam say soothingly, leaning over to kiss his cheek. "You've always made me feel loved. The girls at work always used to get all wistful when I talked about how you'd brought me home flowers or that time you surprised me with a weekend in Paris." Her eyes light up, and she asks, "Are you taking Kurt to Paris to propose?"

"I'd love to, but he's so worried about the wedding I can't imagine he'd even want to leave the state." Walter says. "No, I'll just ask him in our garden. I'd love to take him to the place we met, but Scandals isn't exactly romantic." Pam laughs, and Blaine joins in a beat later, but his laughter sounds hollow to his own ears. He feels like he's empty, a vase that could be broken with a simple tap, crumbling clay. "But I want to make it a romantic evening for him. He loves romance." There's that light in his eyes, love softening his features, and Blaine stares down at the floor.

"Aren't you worried it might take focus away from the wedding?" he asks, very quietly, and the way both his parents look at him immediately with smiles on their faces makes him ache. "I've only met Brittany and Santana a few times, but after all the stress they've gone through organising the wedding it doesn't seem fair to steal their thunder just a few weeks before it."

"Of course, if Kurt says yes, we won't announce it to everyone until after the wedding, and he won't wear the ring," Walter explains, and pulls the small black box out of his pocket. "A perfect moment might come up any time, so I'm carrying this around with me."

"Wow, it's gorgeous!" Pam exclaims in high-pitched excitement when he shows them the simple silver ring. "Kurt is a lucky, lucky man."

"I really think I'm the luckiest guy in the world," Walter says, a slight flush creeping over his cheeks.

That's when Blaine leaves to go upstairs, claiming exhaustion. He can't sit and listen to his father outlining his proposal plans, talking about how happy he is and looking so in love, not when his chest is clenching painfully and he wishes he could talk to someone. But there's no one he wants to talk to, no one who won't just tell him to get over it. This isn't just a silly schoolboy crush, it's so much more than that, and now he knows nothing will ever or can ever happen. Why would Kurt say no? He's clearly happy, in love, content. Those are all things that, as far as Blaine knows, are reasons to accept a marriage proposal.

Even though he tries, he can't sleep, and ends up wandering back downstairs around three o'clock in the morning, curling up on the couch and trying to watch late-night TV. But his thoughts keep creeping up on him, and when he finally falls asleep it's slumped over on the couch, waking up to sunlight streaming through the windows and a familiar voice calling, "We come bearing pancakes!"

Tugging himself off the couch and running a hand through his hair to try and tame the bedhead, Blaine pins a smile on his face for Kurt and Brittany, standing on the doorstep looking bright-eyed and spectacular despite the early hour. Though stress is still evident in her eyes, Brittany is managing to look relaxed in her blue dress, arm linked casually through Kurt's and hair getting caught in her earrings. "We didn't think it would be a problem if Britt came over to pick your mom's brains about weddings," Kurt says, setting the brown paper bag down on an empty counter, and Blaine just shakes his head mutely, "You okay, sweetie? You look like you haven't slept a wink."

"I was talking to Artie until late, he wants to plan some kind of surprise for when he comes back. Airport serenade, maybe," Blaine lies easily, and Kurt laughs, hopping up onto one of the counters and swinging his long legs while Brittany helps herself to the half-empty carton of orange juice. "I'll go wake my parents up."

No sooner has he turned than there are footsteps on the stairs, and Walter emerges into the kitchen. For a moment, in the sunlight, he looks lined and tired, and the age difference between him and Kurt's early morning good looks is plainly evident and shocking. But then he sees Kurt, and his face softens, and he looks younger all over again, crossing the kitchen in long strides to kiss the welcoming smile right off Kurt's face. The kiss goes on for minutes, Blaine looking away and busying himself rustling around for pancakes, and Brittany clears her throat loudly.

Breaking out of the kiss, flushed and breathing heavily and starry-eyed, Kurt scoffs and says, "Please, like you and Santana aren't just as bad. I don't know how many times I sat and talked to an oblivious couple making out right in front of me after you two got back together."

"It's young love, honey, it's sweet," Walter says, and Kurt beams at him, eyes shining in the morning light. With his freckles standing out and his sweet, dizzily-in-love smile, he looks heartbreakingly handsome, and Blaine quickly excuses himself to change before someone notices the dazed look in his eyes.

Things continue on the same way for a week. Kurt will show up on the doorstep, looking like the dictionary definition of handsome, and go straight to Walter's arms. If he's at work, Blaine ends up sitting in the garden with Kurt, looking at the sun on his skin and his eyelashes dark against his cheeks, or wondering if his eyes behind his sunglasses are showing any of the longing that curls in Blaine's belly. He's pathetically grateful when Tina calls him and squeals loudly down the phone about Artie singing  _Can't Help Falling In Love With You_  to her bedroom window immediately after getting off a night flight from LA, and Dave texts him saying he's back in town with his father, thankful to be able to hang out with his friends again and take his mind off Kurt and the ring box he knows is always in his father's pocket.

But, of course, with Tina's tendencies to enjoy knowing everything about Blaine's family, he doesn't keep the secret for long. "Your  _dad_  is going to  _propose_  to  _Kurt_?!" she screeches when he tells them, Artie wincing away from her and Dave covering his ears pointedly. "Oh my God, so does that mean Kurt is going to end up being your stepdad?"

"A man would have to be very much in love to take on three stepchildren, especially two who are older than him and complete brats," Dave says, reaching for the jug of lemonade set on the grass between the four of them.

"Perhaps that could be a plot for a film," Artie muses, staring into the distance like he always does when inspiration strikes. "Or a documentary, of course! To educate those young people with divorced partners on the true perils of taking on stepchildren."

"You  _guys_ , I don't even know if Kurt will say yes, or maybe my dad will change his mind and won't propose at all," Blaine says, and catches Tina rolling her eyes. "People change their minds all the time!"

"Your stubbornness came from somewhere, Blaine," she says, and Dave laughs and high fives her while Blaine sighs heavily at his friends. "I think it's sweet. I mean when we heard your dad had a new boyfriend we so hoped he'd find happiness with him, and obviously he has. Late in life marriages are all the rage these days."

"But he's also right saying Kurt might say no," Artie says. "This has been explored in so many films - people in their twenties consider it to be a decade of exploration and fun, not a time to be settling down with their one true love. Kurt might want to put it off for a few years."

"Those two friends of Kurt's are only twenty-one, and they're getting married now even though they could wait," Dave points out. "I guess when you're in love it doesn't really matter what's popular in society. If you want to get married, you just do it. Even if you haven't been together that long, or people don't approve. You just get down on one knee and ask."

"Are you proposing to Blaine there, David?" Tina asks, and Artie laughs, ruffling her hair affectionately where she's leaning against his legs. "I know you've been apart for almost a year, but I strongly approve of this match. But you better ask me to-  _ah_!" Sniggering, Blaine high-fives Dave as Tina stares down at the wet patch spreading out over her shirt and glares at Dave. "You're so  _mean_!"

"Kurt actually asked me if I thought we'd get back together at the wedding," Blaine says, and Tina waggles her eyebrows with a smirk. "And then Quinn suggested maybe I'd find someone from their friends because, and I quote, 'everyone hooks up at weddings'. Apparently at their teacher's wedding she slept with one of the girls who's getting married." Giving them a minute to digest this new information, he adds, "And there's a gathering at Kurt's parents' house tomorrow, and all their friends will be there, and Quinn said I should bring you guys along so we can get to know them and won't feel as awkward at the wedding."

"Sounds awesome to me, I need to broaden my social circle beyond just you guys," Tina says, and smirks when they all look offended. "Besides, I like Kurt, and I liked that brunette girl he brought over once...Rose?"

"Rachel," Blaine corrects her gently, and she nods. "Well Quinn said there'll be even more people there, and people who didn't go to school with them like two of Kurt's friends from New York. I think one of his friends is dating a girl they did go to high school with whose brother just got back from a month in Hawaii with his girlfriend."

"I think everyone at the wedding is going to need to wear name tags so I can keep them all straight," Artie says, and they all make noises of agreement. "But I guess we can get a head start. I bet they're all lovely people, and it's nice to know some show choir brats like us."

"Quinn said they'd clarify all the couples and that should help us to get names right," Blaine says, refilling his glass. "And then I asked her why they seem so unsupportive of Kurt and my dad, and she said Kurt had had a terrible relationship in high school but wouldn't tell me anything else."

"Oh my God, if they don't like that they're  _dating_  what are they going to think when your dad asks Kurt to marry him?" Tina asks, looking suddenly horrified. "Has your dad even talked to Kurt about getting engaged?"

"He wants it to be a surprise," Blaine says, and catches the look Tina gives Artie, raising her eyebrows and twisting her mouth. "But he knows that he's taking a risk, and I'm sure it won't totally derail their relationship if Kurt says no. I know Dad talked to Kurt's parents and got their permission, and he talked to Lorraine and my mom and they both told him to go for it."

"I suppose it's not really his friends' business if he wants to get engaged to someone he loves," Dave says, stretching out on the grass. "I'd give them a piece of my mind, but I guess we all have to keep what we know a secret."

"Absolutely, until after the wedding," Blaine says sternly. "Even if Kurt says yes, he's going to leave the ring off and they aren't going to tell anyone until Santana and Brittany are away on their honeymoon. Dad doesn't want them to feel like they're trying to steal their day from them." Lying back on the grass, he twists his head slightly to ask, "Do you want a ride to Kurt's parents' place tomorrow, Dave?"

"I'd love one, then I can drink," Dave says, and Blaine rolls his eyes. "Look, Mr. Anderson, just because you like to stick to being the designated because of that one time you got drunk and far too handsy and Tina has never let you live it down, it doesn't mean all of us have to. Let me live!"

Even though they get to Kurt's parents' at ten o'clock in the morning, the back garden is already filled with people talking over each other and handing out drinks as the sun rises in the sky. The introductions, maintained by Rachel with long streaks of sunscreen down the bridge of her nose and across both cheeks, leave Blaine's head spinning with all the names - he knows Mason and Jane are the couple who look exhausted after only just returning from Hawaii, and Sam is the blonde with the big lips who keeps doing very bad impressions, and Elliott is the hot guy with the eyebrow piercing that him, Dave and Tina all stop and stare at for a few seconds.

"You'll straighten it all out eventually," Santana says when he slumps into the chair next to her with an exhausted sigh, pulling his bottle of sunscreen out of his bag and smiling at Tina tugging Artie towards a shady spot of the garden. "There are a lot of us. But then there are the smaller friendship groups, and the two or three people who are particularly close."

"Like you, Kurt and Rachel?" Blaine asks, and Santana nods, a soft smile coming over her lips. "Do all three of you go to NYADA?"

"No, just Rach and Kurt," Santana says, stretching out luxuriously in her chair. "I used to go to the University of Louisville on a cheerleading scholarship, but I dropped out and moved to New York because that was my dream. They took me in-"

"Um, correction, you forced yourself in!" Rachel calls from Jesse's arms, and Kurt nods along with her words.

"Fine, I walked into their apartment and told them I was moving in," Santana says, rolling her eyes, and Blaine laughs. "I go to dance classes at NYADA, and I found a singing tutor through the school forums. I'm not as into musical theatre as Kurt and Rachel, so I just go to the classes and I work at the Spotlight Diner. We sing and we waitress."

"How did you three end up being friends?" Blaine asks, as someone gets the speakers working and everyone cheers loudly as music starts to play loudly out across the garden.

"Well, Rach and I hated each other for ages, and then our glee club did a Whitney Houston week and we just sort of clicked somehow," Santana says with a small shrug. "Kurt and I were friends before that though. He had this terrible boyfriend, he was miserable, and I was struggling with my sexuality, and there was this party going on at someone's house that basically anyone who drove past and heard the music was walking into, and we'd met up at the Breadstix takeout counter so we decided we'd go in just to take our minds off our shitty love lives. We just sat with a bottle of tequila spilling all our sorrows and doing shots, and when we were really drunk we decided to join in with a game of Spin the Bottle-"

"People actually play that at parties?" Blaine asks, lifting his eyebrows.

"It's a New Directions tradition!" someone calls, and they all nod along in agreement.

"Anyway, I spun him, and we started making out, and I thought that it felt nice, and maybe I was straight after all," Santana says, and Blaine listens closely, trying not to be shocked. "We were both just miserable, we needed to feel something, and we spent most of the night wrapped around each other. We woke up the next morning in bed next to each other."

"Oh my God, did you-"

"No, we didn't, thank God," Santana says. "We were both fully-clothed, I'd been spooning him. So we went back to my empty house, drank a lot of coffee, ate nothing and talked all day, and by the time he went home we pretty much knew all the terrible dark thoughts that had been going around each other's heads and we've been friends ever since."

"And I don't know what I'd do without you," Kurt says, wandering past and dropping a kiss on the top of Santana's head. "I'd definitely have lost my mind before graduation if I hadn't been able to call you any time of the day and go eat too much pasta and complain to you."

"We drank a bottle of vodka to celebrate when you finally dumped that guy," Santana says, gesturing to Quinn, Brittany and Puck. "That group text came in and we put on the catchiest song possible and danced around."

"Nice to know you enjoyed my heartbreak," Kurt says lightly.

"No, dude, we enjoyed the fact that you wouldn't spend all of your time miserable because of a guy who didn't treat you right at all," Puck says, and the three women nod along in agreement. "You're my boy, Kurt. I want you to be happy." Kurt laughs and blows him a kiss, and Blaine smiles as he pulls his sunglasses down over his eyes and settles into his chair, feeling the sun on his skin and letting the chatter wash over him.

"So, Britt, it's only twelve days until the wedding!" one of the women says, and Brittany makes a face, leaning over to check her phone. "Are you guys excited?"

"Excited for this whole circus to be over and my girl to stop being stressed so we can have an amazing honeymoon," Santana says. "You should see her in the dress, it's absolutely beautiful. I swear she made my heart stop when I first saw her." Even her voice sounds so in love, and Blaine can't help a small smile at getting to see this run up to a wedding day.

"Yes, and you weren't supposed to see me," Brittany says, her voice strained.

"I've told you, Britt, that tradition is because of gross arranged marriages and I don't want us to have to adhere to it," Santana says, and leans over to kiss Brittany until the stressed furrows in her forehead smooth out and she's smiling softly.

Over the course of the day, the garden is full of life, and Blaine watches Tina and Artie and Dave interacting with Kurt's friends. Tina and Artie are deep in conversation with Quinn and Puck, and Dave is talking to Elliott and a girl with dyed-blue hair, the three of them laughing together. Getting up from his chair and giving Brittany a smile, Blaine pads inside, where it's cooler and much quieter, and goes looking for a bathroom.

Wandering up the stairs, he opens the first door he reaches, and finds himself in what appears to be Kurt's room. The sloping ceilings are papered with photographs, and Blaine lies down on the bed to look at them all. Some of them are Kurt as a child, adorable and chubby-cheeked. There's a faded, creased one of him sitting in the lap of a woman with curly auburn hair and the same freckles and eyes as Kurt himself - obviously his late mother. The newer ones show Kurt with the glee club at various stages of high school, always with his arm around someone and beaming at the camera, looking ridiculously happy. There's an especially professional-looking shot of Kurt and Rachel kneeling opposite each other with stage lights splashing down in the background, and a programme from  _WMHS: WEST SIDE STORY_  pinned up next to it.

A few pictures sit in frames on Kurt's nightstand, and Blaine picks each one up to look at it. There's one of what must be his parents on their wedding day, his father's hand on his mother's slight bump. Another is a prom picture of him with Brittany and Santana, both girls stretching up to kiss his cheeks. One in a heavy wooden frame is him with Santana, Rachel, Elliott and the girl with blue hair, performing somewhere onstage. The newest-looking one is him with Walter, the two of them gazing into each other's eyes. The pose is innocent, but they look so in love.

Replacing the photographs, Blaine leaves Kurt's room as he found it and tries the next door. It opens onto another bedroom, but one that appears as if it hasn't been slept in for months. A framed letterman jacket is on the wall, and the furniture is covered carefully. The whole room carries an air of sadness, and he feels out of place, as if he shouldn't be in there at all.

"Are you lost, kiddo?" Blaine backs out of the room so quickly he almost hits his head on the wall, and turns to face the man who must be Kurt's father. The man who gave Walter his blessing to propose, but apparently doesn't approve of the relationship. "I'm Burt, Kurt's dad."

"Um, no, sorry, I was just looking for the bathroom," Blaine says, closing the door behind him. "Opened the wrong door. You have a lovely home, sir. Thank you so much for letting us all invade your privacy."

"It's no problem, kiddo, Kurt's friends have always hung out here even after he went to New York," Burt says, raising his eyes to heaven with a small smile. "You're Walter's son, right? Kurt calls you one of his best friends."

"Stepson, he married my mom while she was pregnant," Blaine says, thrilling internally at the idea that Kurt has been talking to his parents about him. "And, um, sir...Mr. Hummel, I just want to tell you that I think it's amazing of you to give my dad your blessing to propose to Kurt. This is the happiest I've ever seen him, so I really have to thank you."

"It was all for Kurt," Burt says, pulling his baseball cap down. "He's happy and in love, and we just want to see our only son find the happy ending he's always wanted. I hope your dad will be that for him." Glancing at the closed door, a sadness coming over his face, he adds, "And our family has been taught over the years that you just need to take advantage of every moment that life gives you. I wouldn't gain anything from refusing to let Kurt marry someone he's in love with."

"Mr. Hummel, if this isn't too personal a question, whose does that room belong to?" Blaine asks softly, and Burt looks up at him with suffering splashed across his face.

"Carole is my second wife," he says, and Blaine nods. "Kurt's mom died when he was eight, so it was just the two of us until he introduced me to Carole. He thought we could bond because her husband had died too, when her son was a baby. So we got married about six months after meeting, and Finn and Kurt became stepbrothers. But then Finn was killed in a car crash last May. We've kept his room like that so we can remember him."

"I...I'm sorry," Blaine says, and he kicks himself for saying it. It sounds so wooden, hollow, nothing compared to the loss Kurt and his parents suffered.

"Kurt moved home after the funeral, and he refused to go back to NYADA for his third year no matter how many times Carole and I told him not to have a year out," Burt explains, and Blaine listens carefully. "He'll be going back in the fall. Although I'm not sure if his plans will change if he says yes to the proposal."

Blaine spends an hour talking to Burt and Carole in the kitchen, telling them a few stories of what he's seen of Kurt's relationship with Walter, and he doesn't think he's just imagining the way some tension appears to leave them when he talks about how in love they seem and how much Walter worships Kurt. He's not surprised that they have their reservations about Kurt's relationship with Walter, but he is glad they appear to be supportive.

When he returns to the party, Kurt has already left. "He got an urgent text from the boyfriend and rushed off for a homemade, probably candlelit dinner," one woman - Unique, maybe? - says, and shoots the man who is presumably her boyfriend a pointed look. Something inside Blaine goes cold, his stomach dropping like lead - this is it. The proposal.

All the party attitude leaks out of him like air from a balloon after that, and he's grateful when Tina decides it's time to drag Dave home before he acts on the eyes he's been making at Elliott all day. After dropping the three of them off, Blaine pulls into his empty driveway and sits in the car, wondering if he should leave Kurt and Walter to their evening together. But the house is empty when he walks in, so he goes up to his room and opens the balcony doors to air out the stuffiness of a whole day of sunlight.

"Kurt, I spent years of my life pretending to be someone I'm not." Sitting up slightly on the bed, Blaine can see down into the garden, and see Walter and Kurt standing in the centre of the neatly-mown lawn. Both of them are well-dressed and Kurt is gazing at Walter with eyes softened by love, the day spent in the day adding freckles to his skin and an adorable pink tinge to his cheeks. "I've missed out on so much I could've had because I was scared. When Pam and I split up, I never dared to dream I'd find someone else to love for the rest of my life. And then I found you, and we've never looked back. It's only been a few months, but I can honestly say I love you more than anything."

"I love you too," Kurt says softly, sweetly, and Blaine lies back on the bed with a heavy sigh, listening to the voices drifting up through the open doors.

"From the first time you looked up at me outside Scandals, I knew that we were meant to look at each other, without fear of judgement or jealousy, for the rest of time. You've changed my life for the better, in so many ways," Walter says, the very tone of his voice in love. "I love you so much, and I know that I don't want to waste a single minute I get to share with you. And that is why I want to ask-"

"Honey, what are you doing?"

"Kurt Hummel, the amazing man who made me fall in love in a single month, the man who makes me feel like a teenager falling in love for the first time all over again-"

"Oh my God."

"Will you marry me?"


	6. Can't Stop Thinking About You And I

Yes, I only posted a new chapter yesterday, but I've been excited for these events since starting this fic, so I wrote it extra-fast. A lot happens in this chapter, so please let me know what you think :)

 **Important exclusive-to-this-chapter warnings: past abusive relationship, past violence, past rape**. If you are triggered by any of these and still want to know what happens, please let me know and I will give you a version of events which does not incorporate these warnings.

* * *

Brittany and Santana's wedding day dawns bright and sunny, and Blaine is woken up at eight o'clock by his phone buzzing, rolling over and stabbing his finger randomly down on the screen until he hits the button to accept the call. "Hello?"

"It's me, Brittany!" comes the high-pitched chirp. "I'm in our honeymoon suite right now, where the wedding party are, and we wondered if you'd like to come meet up with us so we have an extra pair of hands around." A voice in the background, and Brittany adds, "And San says she needs someone who won't be focused on getting themselves ready to keep everyone calm."

A scuffle, and Santana comes onto the line. "I know it's early, but we want to be at the venue early just in case anything needs fixing up, so if you could find the inner strength to come join us upstairs we would be eternally grateful."

"Just let me shower and I'll be right up," Blaine says into the phone, and he hears the clamour of voices in the background before Santana hangs up. While he's in the shower he hears his phone go off again, and can't help a small smile as he changes quickly, takes his suit out of the wardrobe in its garment bag, and runs upstairs to the luxurious honeymoon sweet.

Although they were all amazed by the suite when they arrived at the hotel last night, it doesn't look as impressive as a scene of absolute chaos. Having never been a part of a wedding before, the noise and the panicked look behind everyone's eyes is shocking to Blaine. Rachel is screeching at Quinn for pulling her hair with the curlers, Puck is desperately trying to lace Santana into the corset-style bodice of her dress and Brittany is sitting at the dressing table frantically texting. "Our DJ has food poisoning!" she shouts as soon as she sees Blaine, her eyes wild with worry. "What are we going to do? This is supposed to be a perfect day and instead it's all going wrong. And where's Kurt?"

"Probably still in bed," Puck says, wincing as Santana smacks at him for pulling too hard. "If you hadn't woken me up at the crack of dawn, that's where I'd be."

"Aren't you all glee club alumni?" Blaine asks, trying to be as soothing as possible as he puts a tentative hand on Brittany's shoulder. "Why don't you sing instead of having a DJ? It makes the day more personal. More about you guys."

"Blaine, you're a genius!" Brittany shrieks, and kisses him, her eyes bright and her smile wide again. "That is such a good idea, why did none of us think of that?"

"Because we're sleep-deprived and stressed from organising this," Rachel suggests. "And because some of us are getting our hair yanked out,  _Quinn_!"

"If you stopped squirming this would go better, just let me finish and then you can start getting ready," Quinn snaps. Smiling to himself, Blaine takes over from Puck, and carefully laces Santana into her dress. When it's done, she turns and smiles at him, and crosses the room to kiss Brittany.

"This is going to be a perfect day, babe," she says, and Brittany smiles, leaning back against her. "Now come on, let's get you into your dress and you can help me do my face. I haven't decided what lipstick to wear yet."

"I don't know why it matters, it's just going to get kissed off anyway," Kurt says from the doorway, and when Blaine turns to look his breath catches in his throat. Despite the early hour, Kurt is already impeccably dressed and styled, stunning among the half-dressed people surrounding Blaine. He feels dreadfully drab in his pyjamas, and almost wants to slink back down to his room and wait until the wedding. Remove himself from Kurt's presence. "Good morning, everyone."

"Thank God, can you take care of this one's hair?" Quinn asks, giving Rachel the meanest glare Blaine has ever seen. "She's whining that I'm not doing it right, and I haven't showered yet."

"Let me help you," Puck says, waggling his eyebrows, and Quinn giggles as he pulls her into the bathroom and locks the door behind them.

"Wedding days," Rachel says, rolling her eyes as Kurt takes a seat behind her and picks up the curlers. "They just get to everyone. Couples are so much more affectionate, and single people are always making eyes at each other."

"You say that as if you won't be dancing the night away with Jesse later," Kurt says, and Rachel smirks and winks at Blaine. "Now stay still and let me finish this, then you can put your dress on." The second Blaine reaches for the door handle, Kurt snaps, "And don't you dare leave, Blaine Anderson, it's like a zoo here and we need someone who's not in the wedding party to handle us."

Caught up in thinking about how much he'd like to  _handle_  Kurt - he is not touching a single drop of alcohol at this open bar - Blaine doesn't notice until the door to the third room of the suite shuts that he and Kurt are alone. Sitting down at the dressing table and starting to gel his hair carefully into submission, he catches Kurt's eye in the mirror and asks, "Have you made a decision yet?"

"If all you're going to do is ask me questions about your dad, then you can leave."

"No, Kurt, I'm not trying to push you," Blaine says hastily, and Kurt appears to relax a little. "But it's almost been two weeks since my dad asked you, and you haven't given him an answer. He's getting really anxious about it, he thinks he's completely wrecked your relationship. I don't want him to get hurt."

"Oh God, I don't either, I love him," Kurt says, and slumps down on the end of the bed. "I just didn't know what to say. We've only been together a few months, and I love him and I feel safe with him and I know he loves me. But I'm just...I'm so young to be getting married. My dad always advised me that I shouldn't get married too early. I just don't know,  _I don't know_! And I've been so busy trying to organise this wedding, I haven't had time to sit back and think about what I want." He sighs heavily, and rolls onto his side to meet Blaine's gaze in the mirror. "Walter already has a family, and two of his kids don't even like me. I feel like I have no place there."

"Kurt, you can't let Cooper and Natalie chase you away, they're just brats who were spoilt after the divorce and never grew up," Blaine says. "They're just as awful to my mom and to Lorraine's partner. They never come home anyway."

"I'm twenty-one, Blaine," Kurt says, and Blaine nods. "I'm twenty-one and my boyfriend who is over twice my age asked me to marry him. If I say yes, I'm not just saying yes to him, it's to his family too. Your stepsiblings are both older than me. You're only two years younger. I just don't know if that's what I want."

"It's not about us, Kurt." Turning on the stool, Blaine stands and goes to sit next to Kurt, putting an arm around him. "It's not about me or Cooper or Natalie, or my mom or Lorraine. We will all manage by ourselves. What this proposal is about is you, and the fact that my dad wants to spend the rest of his life with you. I know just from watching you two that you are so in love, and whatever doubts you have about him are natural. But your relationship is special and important. My dad took a chance - he wants you to take one too."

"It was nice to wake up with him this morning," Kurt says thoughtfully. "I was lying there just thinking that it wouldn't be so bad to wake up like that every morning." He turns his head and smiles, and looks far too irresistible for Blaine's weak heart. "You are just a miracle. Did you get that speech habit from your dad?"

"I can be incredibly eloquent, but you should've seen me when I was with Dave," Blaine jokes to cover up the sudden jolt of agony in the realisation that Kurt is almost certainly going to say yes, that he probably pushed him off the knife edge of decision. "He's actually a hopeless romantic, I just sort of built on to the things he said."

"Well, regardless, you are a sweetheart, and thank you so much for being my friend," Kurt says, and hugs him. Blaine holds onto him tightly, surrounded by his soft skin and warmth and the scent of his cologne. "And I really am crossing my fingers for you to find someone tonight. And maybe you should let Dave know that Elliott noticed him looking at our party, and he thinks Dave is handsome."

"He'll be thrilled," Blaine says dryly, and Kurt laughs. "I think you better go and knock on the bathroom door, Puck and Quinn have been in there for ages, and if Santana and Brittany want to be at their venue before midday they need to keep the ball rolling."

The venue itself, a barn that Brittany and Santana hired out and made over from top to bottom under the close supervision of their wedding party, is absolutely stunning. With the sun beating down overhead and the huge group of friends and family spilling out over the grass, it's already a magical day. "Damn," Artie says as Blaine pulls into a space and his friends spill out of the car. "This is amazing."

"Our wedding day will be better," Tina says firmly, and Blaine grins at the horror behind Artie's eyes. "Come on, I want to go find out where we're sitting!" She grabs Dave's hand too, and he gives Blaine a pleading look before he's dragged off after her, and Blaine goes in search of his parents.

He can't find his dad - presumably he's with Kurt - but he finds Pam talking to Kurt's parents, her head thrown back in laughter. "Blaine, my little dove, I think you've met Burt and Carole Hummel, Kurt's parents," she says, putting an arm around him and smiling. "I was just saying I would never have expected my introduction to someone to include the fact that my ex-husband is dating their son."

"Planning to propose to, as we understand," Carole says, smiling softly. "Kurt was really anxious for a while that Santana wouldn't invite your family to this wedding, so we're really glad we got to meet you." Pam smiles charmingly, and Blaine nods politely to Burt before he walks away, into the barn to find his seat.

By the time Elliott and Mercedes stand up from their seats, the buzz of excited chatter is as loud as an engine, and Elliott has to bang his hand on the microphone for silence. "As we found out this morning that Brittany and Santana have lost their musicians, there will not be a traditional wedding march for them," Mercedes says. "But isn't that just perfect? Why bother with tradition?"

"Instead, Mercedes and I are going to sing a little something from our repertoire to welcome Miss Brittany Pierce and Miss Santana Lopez for the last time before they become Mrs. and Mrs. Pierce-Lopez," Elliott says, and smiles. "Please feel free to join in."

The music starts from the speakers, and Mercedes lifts her microphone and, in a voice that sends shivers down Blaine's spine, sings, " _At last, my love has come along. My lonely days are over, and life is like a song."_  Blaine turns with the rest of the congregation to watch Brittany walk down the aisle between Puck and Quinn, smiling from ear to ear and absolutely radiant. She grins at him as she passes, and takes her place just in front of Burt, her eyes filling with tears when Santana appears between Kurt and Rachel in the doorway.

Brittany pulls Santana into a kiss the moment she reaches the altar, not even giving Kurt a chance to politely give her away, and the rows of their friends laugh the loudest. "Alright, girls, you'll have plenty of chances to do that today," Burt says fondly, and Brittany pulls away with a grin on her face and half her lipstick already kissed off. "As I appear to have misplaced my notes, you'll have to bear with me." Blaine isn't the only one to laugh when Puck leans over to Quinn and exaggeratedly mouths  _Drunk_. "I could not be more honoured to be standing here today to marry these two wonderful young women. Theirs is truly a love story for the ages, and they found each other in high school. Brittany, Santana, you two are incredibly lucky, and as my son looks like he might cry if I say anything more I'm going to let you two speak for yourselves."

With a smirk on her lips, Santana turns and hands Kurt a handkerchief, prompting laughter once again, and turns back to Brittany, squeezing her hands tightly. "Brittany, you are the love of my life," she says, and the mood quickly becomes one of love. Blaine can see all the couples curling up to each other, and Kurt and Rachel both smiling softly at their boyfriends in their seats. "Through all of high school, no matter how bad things were or how terrible I was, you stuck by me. You were my knight in shining armour, saving me from denying who I was and a lifetime of unhappiness. Every day with you has been a blessing, and I know in my heart that we were born to find each other and fall in love. I love you, you mean the world to me, and standing here promising to be with you for the rest of my life is the best thing that's ever happened to me."

"Oh my God," Brittany breathes, dabbing at her wet eyes. "I love you too, Santana. I've always loved you, ever since the first day we looked at each other in the locker room. I loved you through other boys and other girls, and I always hoped that we'd end up finding our way back to each other. Being a genius, I've tried to figure out the formula for soulmates, and I know it's me plus you. I'll never need another person to make me happy as long as I have you, and the day that you told me you wanted me forever was the best of my life. You're my prince and my soulmate, and I've found the happily ever after I've always wanted with you. I love you so much."

"Oh boy," Burt says, his voice gruff with emotion, and Blaine subtly dabs at his eyes. Dave squeezes his hand comfortingly, and passes a tissue to an openly sobbing Tina. "Santana Lopez, do you take Brittany Pierce to be your wife?"

"I do."

"Brittany Pierce, do you take Santana Lopez to be your wife?"

"I do."

"Then, by the power vested in me by the state of Ohio, I pronounce you wife and wife," Burt says, beaming at the two excited women. "And everyone say it with me:-"

"You may kiss the bride!" the entire room shouts, and Santana laughs once before wrapping her arms around Brittany and kissing her. People are cheering and shouting, and Kurt, Rachel and Quinn are all in tears, Puck sniffing hard and trying to look stoic and unmoved, and the noise continues for minutes before Mercedes once again stands up and takes a microphone.

"This is for the first glee club alumni to get married," she says sweetly, handing microphones to the bridesmaids and best men. "Here's to many more weddings." As Brittany and Santana take hands and run down the aisle together, giggling newly-weds with confetti raining down on them, the whole room joins in on the rendition of  _What The World Needs Now_. Jesse gets up from his seat, going to give Rachel a kiss, a tissue and his arms around her, and Kurt drops his position to go to Walter, kissing him softly and wiping away the last of his tears.

The buffet is delicious, and Blaine gets to sit with his friends and family, joining in on teasing a still hiccuping Tina and watching his mother exchanging glances with someone's father, smiling into his drink. It would be ironic if everyone he knows walks away from this wedding with someone other than himself. And from the looks Dave keeps exchanging with Elliott, the likelihood of them going back to the hotel together is looking higher and higher. The long looks only stop when Elliott gets called over by Santana with Dani, and she talks to the two of them, Kurt and Rachel before she stands up and gracefully mounts the stage, taking the microphone and beaming around at the rom. Her lipstick has all been kissed off and her eyeliner is smudged by tears, but she looks absolutely beautiful as she shines out with love.

"First of all, although you've been given free reign over the entertainment tonight, I'm going to have to insist that no one uses this as an opportunity to sing their way through angst or anger," she says sternly, and laughter breaks out. "This is a wedding, after all. My wedding." Her face softens, and she sweetly says, "Not only am I so happy that I now have the title of first glee club alumni to get married and I can lord it over all of you forever, but I feel like the luckiest woman in the world. Brittany S. Pierce-Lopez is my soulmate, and I am so lucky that she loves me as much as I love her and she agreed to marry me and put up with my bitchiness for the rest of our lives." Smiling, she continues, "I think if I try to stand here and tell you everything I love about my Britt we'll all still be here in a hundred years, so instead myself and my bandmates from the short-lived but star-quality Pamela Lansbury have a gift for my new wife - and their significant others too."

Elliott, Dani, Kurt and Rachel take the stage next to Santana, and launch into a stunning rendition of  _Like A Virgin_. Dani's girlfriend and Mason's twin, Madison, looks completely enchanted by her girlfriend, dancing along in her seat. Jesse is beaming proudly up at Rachel. Brittany is grinning and returning the winks Santana keeps giving her. Blaine grins too when Santana puts her arm around Kurt and they sing together, laughing over the memory of the story about how they became friends.

Brittany takes the stage next, her wedding and engagement rings flashing in the fairy lights strung around the barn, and she only gives a short speech before she calls Kurt and Quinn up onto the stage with her. "We first performed this song together in Kurt's basement in sophomore year, and let's say that it's become a bit of a classic of ours since then," she says with a smirk, and Puck wolf-whistles loudly when the three of them dance to  _Single Ladies_ , the whole room's attention called to Brittany's ring as she dances.

She steps down, and Kurt takes the microphone from its stand with a smile around at his audience. His training in performance is obvious in his presence, he way he stands and projects so the whole room hears every word. "Almost five years ago, I arranged my parents' wedding, and that was the most beautiful day for our family," he says sweetly. "And now I've arranged this wedding too, and I'm going to be very immodest and say I think it's even more beautiful. But then, we all knew it would be beautiful since Santana proposed back in February - less than a week after I started dating a new boyfriend, I would like to point out." Smirking at the laughter, he softly continues, "For people like Santana and Brittany and myself, we grew up in a time of change for the LGBT community. When I was five, and I knew I was different, same-sex couples couldn't get married. And here we are sixteen years later, at the wedding of two of my best friends, and now we can all share in marriage. It's a beautiful thing. Marriage is so much more than a piece of paper, or a ring on your finger, or a big party where you get to be the centre of attention. Marriage is about the expression of love - it's a way to tell the rest of the world that you have decided to be partnered with the other person for the rest of your life. To love and to trust them through everything. It's a promise to always love them."

Brittany and Santana look into each other's eyes and smile, and Kurt smiles too as couples lean into each other. "Santana and I are similar in many ways," he says. "She lied to herself for years because she was scared to be who she really is and to admit that she was worthy of the love of an amazing woman like Brittany Susan Pierce-Lopez. I forced myself to stay in a relationship I knew was unhealthy because I was scared no one would ever love me. These two amazing women, and so many others in this room, helped me to heal from heartbreak. If it wasn't for Santana ignoring her designated driver duties on my birthday, I would never have gotten the chance to get to know the man who currently holds my heart." He smiles across the room at Walter, and Blaine can't help but grin when he sees the shock and love on his father's face, hiding his laughter when Tina tears up all over again.

Kurt looks around at the room, waiting for silence and everyone's full attention, and his voice is loud and clear and sincere as he says, "Something that I haven't told anyone, at Walter's request, is that, twelve days ago, he asked me to marry him." Murmurs sweep across the room, and Kurt smiles at Walter, a slight sheen of tears making his eyes shine. "I needed some time to think about it, but my doubts are all centred around your family, and not you. I love you. I want to be with you." Smiling again, Kurt asks, "Honey, would you please get over here?"

Walter seems to rise from his seat and cross the room in a daze, and Kurt steps down from the stage and pulls the ring box gently out of his pocket, pressing it into Walter's slack hands. "Ask me again," Kurt says softly. "In front of everyone. I want to show the world that I have no doubts about you."

Clearing his throat, radiant with love, Walter goes to one knee and, voice trembling, asks, "Kurt Hummel, the amazing man who made me fall in love in a single month, the man who makes me feel like a teenager falling in love for the first time all over again, will you marry me?"

"Yes." Silence reigns as Kurt hands the microphone to the nearest waiting pair of hands, tears in his eyes as he holds out his hand and Walter slides the ring onto his finger. The silver gleams in the light, looking at home almost immediately, and tears start to trail down Kurt's cheeks as he flings his arms around Walter and kisses him, a kiss returned so passionately it brings Kurt off his feet.

Sam starts to clap, the sound making people jump in the silence, but stops almost immediately, looking around at the still, shocked crowd in confusion. Finally, Puck taps his finger against the microphone as Kurt and Walter break apart, beaming at each other, clears his throat and asks, "So, would anyone like to announce their pregnancy to add to the wedding and engagement?" A slight ripple of laughter fills the room, and Puck turns to Kurt with a smile and a glass of champagne in one hand. "Well then, congratulations to the happy couple. Looks like the next glee club alumni wedding will be sooner than we expected." Kurt grins as the room all hastily grab their glasses and toast to him, blowing Puck a kiss. "And let's get this party started!"

A cheer goes up, and Jane drags Roderick and Spencer up onto the stage to sing  _Uptown Funk_ , and Blaine is the first out of his chair to go to his father. "I'm so happy for you," he says quickly, stumbling over his words, and Kurt beams at him and hugs him tightly.

"It's all thanks to what you told me this morning," Kurt breathes in his ear, and then leans back into Walter, curling up to him and looking at him with eyes alight with adoration. "This is love. Why should I deny myself it?" Walter smiles, and slides his arm more firmly around Kurt's waist, and Kurt turns his head into another kiss. Blaine smiles at them one last time and moves on, asking Roderick's girlfriend Kitty for a dance and joining the singing, swaying group on the floor.

As the night progresses, constant music provided by the loud, overexcited group celebrating both a wedding and an engagement, more and more people are stumbling over themselves after taking advantage of the free bar. According to Santana, her estranged father's only contribution to the wedding was sending a lot of money, and she used it to provide the bar for her friends, who are all dancing in a crowd on the floor with their glasses in hand. Individual couples break away from the group, swaying gently and kissing, but they're always absorbed back into the crowd. After a lot of squealing from one of Kurt's slightly drunk friends, Blaine takes his turn on the stage with Dave and Artie, singing a rendition of  _Shut Up And Dance_  that has the whole room up and dancing.

It's only when Blaine collapses into a chair that he realises it's past midnight, and his parents are heading for him. "We're heading back to the hotel, Blaine," Walter says, ruffling his hair affectionately. Glancing at Pam and Carole, both laughing, he lowers his voice and confides, "Your mother has found a kindred spirit, but unfortunately neither of them can hold their liquor. I'll see you in the morning."

Blaine just nods, laughing at his mother stumbling on her way out of the barn, and watches his father tap Kurt on the shoulder, and the long, deep kiss they exchange in goodbye. He can't fail to notice the way Rachel's face, previously grinning and giggling as she danced with Kurt, darkens when he turns to Walter, the light bouncing off his engagement ring. But he doesn't get long to wonder what's wrong before Mercedes drags Roderick onto the stage for a bouncy duet of  _All About That Bass_ , and Tina drags him up onto the dance floor, twirling around under the lights, her face flushed with drink and love.

After Kurt and Elliott have sung a loud, flirty duet of  _I Believe In A Thing Called Love_ , and vanished outside with Rachel, Dani and a bottle of tequila, Santana collapses into the chair next to Blaine and kicks off her heels, rubbing her foot with a long sigh. "What's their story?" Blaine asks, gesturing to the two men performing together, captivating plenty of the people still milling around despite the late hour. "Did they ever date?"

"Not formally, but they went out together a few times, and they slept together after some of our band's performances," Santana says, glancing up at them. "They're always a bit flirty like this, but it's no different to me and Quinn. Elliott did wonders for rebuilding Kurt's self-esteem after it was completely shredded in high school." She looks at Blaine then, and must catch a little of his confusion. "He didn't tell you the whole story?"

"All I know is what I've picked up from his conversations with you guys," Blaine says with a small shrug. "I don't know if even my dad knows the whole story." Santana's eyes go wide, and she leans in closer.

"Look, I'll tell you, because Kurt's going to be your family, and he'd want you to know exactly what attracted him to your dad in the first place, aside from so many tequila shots he spent the day after his birthday in the bathroom swearing up and down he was dying," she says, and Blaine winces at the thought - he's been there. It wasn't pretty. "Kurt didn't have a great time in high school, as I'm sure you've picked up. Even when the glee club started, he didn't have a whole lot of friends, he wasn't that comfortable in his own skin, and he kept crushing on straight guys who either didn't know or were horrified when they found out. He had a crush on his stepbrother for a while, but thankfully that faded away and they were like real brothers before Finn..." She trails into silence, her face screwing up in agony, and Blaine just nods to show her he knows. "So, as you can imagine, when a guy showed interest in him at the start of junior year, all he needed to do was snap his fingers and Kurt jumped. The poor thing was so starved of love and romance, he fell for total lines."

"You guys say the boyfriend treated him badly," Blaine says. "Why would you stay with someone who treats you like that?"

"You just don't get it," Santana says, shaking her head. "From what I understand, your only relationship was with Dave, you were close friends first and went straight back to being that when you stopped the romance, right?" Blaine nods, and Santana sighs. "For Kurt, it was nothing like that. He wanted love and romance and a high school sweetheart, and the guy...well, I can't say I understand anything that went on in the asshole's head, but I'm almost certain he only wanted Kurt because he was young and pretty and a virgin. When they met, this guy was twenty-three." When Blaine opens his mouth, sudden anger heating his words, she adds, "I know Kurt is with your dad now, but when Kurt was only sixteen, the fact that a creep seven years older than him was chasing after him was absolutely horrifying. When he told the glee club he was seeing this guy, all bright-eyed and blushing and happy, we were all so angry and so scared for him. You know that Puck calls Kurt his boy - that all started around then, because Puck and Finn wanted to go punch this guy's head in as soon as we all figured out Kurt was being treated horribly."

Blaine feels sick to his stomach just hearing the story, but he forces himself to listen as Santana continues. "Jason, that was his name, had this persona on when we all marched into Breadstix and demanded to be introduced to him. He seemed smooth and charming, and more than one of us came away convinced he was wonderful and we'd been too hasty in judging him. Sure, the age gap bothered us, but the way Kurt looked at him was so loving. We couldn't judge his happiness. Then we had Sectionals, and the guy who took photographs bumped into Kurt and spilled coffee down his shirt, and when he was changing we all noticed the bruises on his chest. He waved them off, saying they were from shifting furniture - this was just after Burt and Carole got married and they moved into a new place. We knew he was lying, but it was easier to believe him. I just wish one of us had stood up then and made him tell us the truth."

"Kurt was in an abusive relationship in high school?" Blaine asks faintly, and Santana nods grimly. "God, that's awful. But you said they didn't break up until Kurt started college. Why didn't he end it when the guy started hurting him?"

"Love fucks with your mind," Santana says darkly. "It makes you forgive terrible things and stick with people even though your head is screaming at you to get away. Kurt started to wear lots of layers, and always long sleeves, and even though we all knew he was hiding bruises not one of us spoke up. He'd come to school with red eyes, and never put his phone on silent even though he was getting detentions. Puck and I used to bust him out of them and try to get him to come out, maybe meet someone new and realise that he didn't have to stick with Jason, but he'd always rush off. Even when we went into senior year, and he had closer friends, he still didn't dump the asshole. And then, after the first performance of our school musical, a group of us went out to Breadstix, and Jason turned up there because Kurt hadn't texted him back. We knew that it was an abusive relationship, we knew that we shouldn't let Kurt be with him, but we couldn't get through to him. After that night, he took Kurt's virginity...by force."

Blaine goes cold all over, feeling a shudder of revulsion roll down his spine, and Santana squeezes his hand tightly. "Of course, we've found this out since. Kurt started to rebel a little more towards the end of senior year, when he auditioned for NYADA. When he didn't get in, Jason was thrilled - he didn't want Kurt moving away and out of his control. There were so many times that Puck and I had to talk each other out of beating the absolute shit out of him so he couldn't hurt Kurt anymore. And then he started fucking a new guy, and Kurt finally broke up with him when he caught them together, and moved to New York. But it still broke his heart, because he was completely fucked up with love. That's why I broke up with Britt soon after, because I was scared she would turn me inside out and hurt me like Kurt had been hurt."

"Oh my God," Blaine whispers softly. He thinks about the Kurt he knows, confident and handsome and in love, and wonders how many cracks his jokes and sarcasm are hiding. "I...I didn't know. No wonder you guys were a bit iffy about the age gap."

"I don't know if Burt and Carole know the whole story, but they definitely know bits of it," Santana says. "And, after what I've seen Walter do and the things Kurt said today, I know that we all need to get over feeling a little weird about the age gap. Kurt got more than a little drunk at the bachelorette party, and you should feel glad you weren't there - after he gave us this impossibly cheery breakdown of Walter's abilities in bed," Blaine almost chokes on air, and Santana nods, a small smirk playing around the corners of her mouth, "he started talking about why he was initially attracted to him, and the thing that stood out most is that he was kind and romantic and stable. Kurt needs stability in his life - he lost his mom and his brother, his dad only just stopped him from dropping out of second year at NYADA when he had cancer last year, and the first guy he was interested in after moving to New York ended up dumping him because Kurt still had these scars and couldn't give as much of himself to the relationship as this guy would've liked. He's one of my best friends, and I know that your dad is going to do everything he can to make Kurt happy. Kurt is happy now, and I can't possibly feel anything but incredibly pleased about that."

On cue, Elliott and Dani appear, both looking frazzled and slightly scared, and Elliott quietly says, "Um, San, Kurt and Rachel got into a fight and neither of us can get them to stop. They've both had far too much to drink, and Kurt was talking about how happy he is that he's the next one getting married, and Rachel made a really nasty comment about Walter, and before we could stop them they're screaming at each other."

"Rachel's bright red in the face and Kurt got so worked up he started crying, and they're just dealing low blow after low blow," Dani says. "I think Rachel might've called Kurt a frigid bitch, and Kurt definitely called her controlling diva. We can't get them to stop."

"Get Jesse and distract Rachel with a duet," Santana says, immediately jumping into action. "But if Kurt's crying, he's too drunk and we need to get him out of here before something bad happens like him telling his tale of woe to one of my aunts."

"I'll drive him back to the hotel, I haven't had anything to drink," Blaine volunteers, and the trio all give him grateful looks. "Santana, why don't you go and get him, give him some water and make sure he stays outside in the fresh air. I'll be there in a minute."

Sliding through the crowds to get to Tina and Artie, he calls to them over the music, and they both shakes their heads. Clearly, for them, the party isn't over, and Blaine can't help a fond smile as he pushes through a crowd of Brittany's cousins to get to Dave. "I'm taking Kurt back to the hotel, he's had too much to drink," he explains loudly, and Dave nods in understanding. "Do you want a ride?"

"I..." Dave trails off, and Blaine follows his gaze to Elliott, swaying on the edge of the dance floor and looking incredibly handsome in the gently glow of the fairy lights. "I really like this guy, Blaine. This might be my only chance."

"Well, good luck to you," Blaine says, and leans over to kiss Dave's cheek. "Just text me to let me know whether or not you're coming back to our room, so I know whether to wait up or not."

"You have feelings for Kurt." It's not a question, and Blaine freezes where he stands. Dave looks up at him with sad sympathy in his gaze, and says, "I know that look, Blaine. It's the look you used to give me across the room during Warbler practices. It's the look that made me ask you out. I won't tell anyone, okay. But you need to work it out. It's only going to get you hurt."

"I know," Blaine replies quietly. And then he smiles, and says, "And I happen to have heard from a little birdie that Elliott thinks you're handsome, so somehow I think you won't be coming back to our room tonight. As a great woman once said, everyone hooks up at weddings." Dave swats at him, but his eyes are shining with hope, and Blaine smiles to himself as he picks his way outside, the cool air of the night shocking after the heady heat inside the barn.

Santana has Kurt standing by Blaine's car, swaying on his feet, face streaked silvery with tears in the moonlight and eyes rimmed with red, lips swollen from the long, deep kisses he's been swapping with Walter all night. "Look after him," Santana says, and leans in to hug Blaine. "I think, now you know our stories and you've taken a too-drunk member of the group home, your initiation is complete. I'll give you people's numbers before we all split up again."

"Thank you," Blaine says, and kisses her cheek gently. "And congratulations again. You're a beautiful bride, and this was a beautiful day." She grins at him, kisses his cheek in return, and walks back into the barn as Blaine coaxes Kurt into the passenger seat. "How are you feeling?"

"Rachel's a bitch," Kurt mumbles angrily, and Blaine swallows a laugh. "Other than that, super good. I'm engaged now." He waves his left hand around, ring gleaming, and Blaine smiles at him. "I really love him."

"I know." Climbing into the driver's seat, Blaine carefully pulls out of the parking lot and drives away, heading down the roads back to the hotel. They've barely been driving a minute when Kurt starts sniffling again, and by the time Blaine parks outside the hotel he's in tears, dabbing at his eyes with the edge of his sleeve, nose running and lower lip trembling. "Oh Kurt, please don't cry," Blaine whispers, reaching into the glove compartment for a packet of tissues and trying to clean Kurt up a little. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing, everything, I don't know," Kurt whimpers through his tears, blowing his nose loudly. "I should be happy. My best girls got married today, I got engaged to my boyfriend who I love so much, but something's still missing. And Rachel's a bitch. She said I shouldn't be marrying Walter because he's too old, and I only said yes because I'm scared no one else is ever gonna love me."

"That's not true," Blaine says firmly. "You said yes because you're in love and you want to spend the rest of your life with my dad. And lots of people love you. Santana, Brittany, Puck, Quinn, my mom, me-"

"You love me?" Kurt looks so sweet at innocent peering at him from behind his tissue, his eyes very blue and his lashes spiky with tears, that Blaine just smiles and squeezes his hand.

"Of course I do, Kurt, you're my friend," he says, and Kurt beams at him. "Come on, let's get you inside and into bed. You need to sleep this off."

"No!" Kurt shouts, and pulls Blaine's hand off the door handle. "If we go to sleep it's not the wedding day anymore, and we'll break the spell. Wedding days are very special. Everyone is in love and anything can happen." He meets Blaine's eyes, and for a moment his gaze seems clear, without drunkenness. Blaine doesn't realise what's coming until Kurt is leaning over, and it's too late to move away as Kurt's lips land on his.

It's the sort of kiss that makes the earth move under his feet. Kurt's lips are soft, and slightly salty from his tears, and his fingers are curled over Blaine's thigh. Blaine can feel the heat pouring off his skin, smell his cologne and the sharp scent of hairspray, and it's making his head spin. But then Kurt pulls away abruptly, eyes wide, and without another word he climbs out of the car and, before Blaine can get out and help him, has stumbled up to the hotel and inside. Blaine just sits alone for another minute, staring into space, completely shocked.

Kurt  _kissed_  him. Kurt's fingers were on his thigh and Kurt's lips were on his, moving with his, and Kurt leaned in first, Kurt initiated it. His head is spinning as he walks up to the hotel, collecting his key card from the tired-looking receptionist and shuffling upstairs to his room. Why did Kurt kiss him? For God's sake, he just said yes to Blaine's father's marriage proposal. What is he doing/ And why didn't Blaine push him off immediately? Why did he let it happen?

Of course, he knows the answer to that last one - he's fallen for Kurt. Sweet, confident, sexy Kurt has broken down all his walls and walked right into his heart to make a home, filling him with hot guilt and ugly jealousy. Kurt kissed him, and now Blaine's heart is pounding and his skin is hot and he's biting a knuckle to resist the temptation to find Kurt and finish what they started.

And then a knock comes on his door, and when he opens it Kurt is there, red-eyed and tear-streaked and out of breath. "I'm sorry," he gasps, and then he's in Blaine's arms, kicking the door shut and kissing him so hard it could almost be called aggressive. Blaine can smell him, his cologne and hairspray and the drink on his breath, feel the wetness on his skin from his tears, and when Kurt's fingers wrap around his jaw and Kurt's tongue brushes against his lips he doesn't resist, kissing him back with just as much passion. Whatever is fueling this, Kurt clearly plans to go with it - he backs Blaine towards the bed, straddling him as he goes down with a soft thud, and Blaine lets out a shuddery moan when he feels Kurt hard against his thigh, curling his fingers into Kurt's hair to press their mouths closer together.

Kurt groans and separates their lips, kissing down Blaine's neck and making him gasp and clutch at the sheets as he sucks at the sensitive skin, clearly determined to leave a mark. He sits up, tugging frantically at his blazer and throwing it into the corner of the room, one layer less between them. And then he's on Blaine again, kissing him with a frantic kind of energy, running fingers through his hair to break it loose of the gel, rocking his hips against Blaine's stomach with increasingly fevered moans. Blaine lets out the loudest moan yet when Kurt's fingers drop to the button on his pants, yanking at it until it comes loose and lowering the zipper, kissing his neck again and nipping this time, still grinding his erection into Blaine's belly.

And then Blaine feels the shock of cool metal against his neck, where his skin is buzzing from Kurt's lips and tongue and teeth, and reality kicks in. This isn't some random guy he decided to hook up with because the romantic atmosphere of a wedding got to him - this is Kurt Hummel. His friend. Someone he respects more than this. This is his father's  _fiancé_. He feels despicable, the guilt filling him up and gnawing at him, and he pushes Kurt off him, sitting up against the headboard and looking at Kurt with his half-unbuttoned shirt and messy hair and flushed cheeks and glazed eyes and obvious erection. He looks debauched and so sexy, but Blaine feels sick that it was him that did that, and firmly says, "We shouldn't be doing this. This is so  _wrong_."

"But you feel so good," Kurt sighs, reaching for him again, and looking confused when Blaine pushes his grasping fingers away. "I want you. Just let me have you, I'll make you feel so good."

"Kurt, you're drunk and upset, I'd be taking advantage of you," Blaine says firmly. "And this is cheating. You're engaged, to my  _dad_ , and I won't let you betray him because you've had too much to drink. You've been cheated on. Do you really want to put him through the heartbreak you went through?"

Kurt's face instantly shuts off, all trace of the seductive, sexy man gone, replaced by someone who looks like a child, lost and sad. "Oh my God, you're right," Kurt says, and stumbles off the bed, picking up his blazer and clutching it tightly, rubbing the material against his cheek like a comfort blanket. "I'm so...I'm sorry. I...I shouldn't be here."

The door slams behind him loud enough to ring through the hotel, and Blaine slumps down onto the bed, head still spinning.

 


	7. When The Sun Came Up

Thank you so much for all your comments on the last chapter! They seriously made my day :) Hope you enjoy the fallout just as much :D

* * *

_Pam is smiling, eyelids drooping and skin grey with exhaustion, but eyes shining. The nurse is smiling too, as she carefully lays the tiny mewling baby in Pam's arms. "Congratulations, Mr. and Mrs. Anderson," she says sweetly. "Your son is very beautiful."_

" _Gets that from his mother," Walter says softly, and Pam laughs softly and swats at him. He looks down at the tiny face, the big blue eyes and the dark eyelashes, pink cheeks and that tiny mouth smacking at air. There's curiosity in the baby's gaze, and he can't help the tears that spring to his eyes when Pam lets him hold their son. "What are we going to name him?"_

" _Blaine," Pam says immediately. "Blaine Devon Anderson."_

_Walter glances at her, a single tear falling. "Devon like my mom's maiden name?"_

" _Devon like your mom's maiden name," Pam nods with a smile. "I know how much she meant to you, darling. We should honour her. She'd be so proud to meet her handsome new grandson."_

* * *

" _Come on, my little dove, show Daddy what you did today!" Walter has to laugh at how eager Pam is with her new video camera, pointing it at Blaine sitting on the rug and staring up at Walter with his huge golden eyes. He looks more and more like his mother every day, with his curls and dimples and sweet nature. "Blainey, let Daddy see how clever you are!"_

_Blaine crawls across the rug to Walter's feet, and grabs at his leg. Walter can only watch in amazement as his son, barely a year old, hauls himself up onto his feet, and takes a few wobbly steps, grinning when Pam shrieks in excitement. "Blainey, you can walk!"_

" _Of course he can, he's just as clever as his momma," Walter says, and sweeps Blaine up into his arms, kissing the top of his head just to hear his giggles. "Come on, little bird, let's get you some food."_

* * *

" _Daddy!" It's not the first time this week that Walter has come home to his five year old son in tears, running at him the moment he walks into the house, and he sighs heavily as he bends down to let Blaine hug him. "Daddy, Cooper and Natalie were mean again. Cooper had a girl and he was kissing her and when I asked him to play he told me to go away, and I tried to play with Natalie but she was watching TV and pushed me over and laughed when it hurt my leg."_

" _Blainey, you know they're only jealous because me and their mom didn't stay married, and your daddy and momma love you and each other very much," Walter reassures him. "I'll call Aunt Lorraine, okay? She can come and see them and tell them they're being unfair to you."_

" _Then I could see Virginia!" Blaine shouts in excitement, all trace of tears gone as he bounces around the hallway. "Please invite her, Daddy, she's my bestest friend!"_

_Walter can only smile as Blaine rushes away to find Pam, baking brownies in the kitchen for one of her work friends' birthday, but he still broods over how he can have his and Lorraine's children stop bullying his youngest so venomously._

* * *

_Blaine is seven, and his father is roaring at Cooper and Natalie after they pushed him off a rock during the family camping trip and he scraped his knee badly. His father then smiles at him, and gives him a piece of chocolate for being so brave._

_Blaine is ten, and his father takes him to see his first Broadway show. They captivate him with their beautiful costumes and soaring voices, and his father smiles when he walks out of the theatre dizzy and swearing he'll be on Broadway one day._

_Blaine is fourteen, and recovering from a fractured rib, and his father brings him movies and books and magazines, always there when he has nightmares, reassuring him that it's not him that's flawed, but the world._

_Blaine is seventeen, and his recently-divorced parents are watching him lead the Warblers to a national victory in LA, and there's an enormous bouquet of flowers backstage with a message from his father that brought tears to his eyes._

* * *

_And Blaine is eighteen, and Kurt is in his lap, kissing him so passionately but with that soft edge of tenderness that makes the touch of his lips irresistible. Everything is perfect, Kurt's fingers brushing against his cheek and his neck and his chest, down further as he smirks wickedly. And then the door opens._

" _How could you?" Blaine pushes Kurt away, and there are already tears in his eyes as he sees the heartbreak splashed across his father's face. "How could you, Blaine?! I want to marry him, I love him, and you're taking him away from me!" Walter's face darkens, and he says, "I can never forgive you for this."_

* * *

After a night of restless sleep, the horror of what he's done intertwining with how simply  _hot_  it was to have Kurt on top of him, kissing the breath right out of him, Blaine thinks he'll be the first downstairs in his sweatpants and ragged  _NYU_  T-shirt. It's only nine o'clock, and he brought Kurt back at half past two - surely everyone else was much later.

But, when he walks into the dining room, there's a rather large group already there, including Puck and Quinn. He looks awake and alert, spooning up cereal with his eyes trained firmly on the door, and she's sitting with her hands wrapped around a mug of coffee, glaring at him. Santana and Brittany are there too, sleepily satisfied, Brittany half in Santana's lap as they simply toy with their food, exchanging kisses and tipping their foreheads together and swapping sweet nothings. "Do you know what he did to me?" Quinn asks, staring daggers into the side of Puck's head. "He made me wake up at six when we didn't get back until four so he could sit down here and watch for the people who hooked up last night."

"Puck, you do know most of us are in committed relationships, and so most of us got some last night, right?" Mason asks, winking at Jane, who rolls her eyes and returns to her toast. "Or did you not get any, and therefore have to watch out for those who did?" Quinn giggles and grins at him, and Puck rolls his eyes.

"There's a fine art to spotting the people who spent the whole night screwing," he says, and most of the group all roll their eyes, some even going so far to groan. "The fact that they're not downstairs yet is a great indication. I'm sure most of us were swept up in the romance of yesterday, but the key difference would be that we went to sleep afterwards. People who didn't have that look of tired pride. And then clothes also point to it - they throw on anything they can find, often something that's not theirs. And obviously there are physical signs, like messed-up hair and hickies. There's just this sense of accomplishment around someone who didn't sleep for sex, it's very obvious." Looking up, his jaw drops open slightly and he swallows before saying, "They look exactly like that."

On cue, everyone looks up at the same time, and something hot and painful twists in Blaine's stomach when he watches Kurt saunter into the room. True to Puck's word, pride is shining in his eyes despite the dark shadows beneath them, and his hair is a mess, sticking up at all angles. He's wearing tight jeans, feet bare, and a shirt that plainly isn't his, fastened several buttons too low to show off his long, pale neck. Well - not quite so pale.

"Jesus fucking  _Christ_ , Kurt, does your fiancé know you're not edible?!" Puck suddenly exclaims, and Kurt turns to look at him with a smirk on his lips and fire in his eyes. "Fucking hell, I can practically see the teeth marks. You're already wearing a ring!"

"We were celebrating," Kurt says sweetly, and Blaine can feel the blush stealing up his neck, discomfort creeping over his skin. He can't handle hearing this - not after Kurt showing up at his door. Not after Kurt kissed him so passionately and was absolutely prepared to have sex with him. "I did say yes to his proposal yesterday."

"Yes. at  _my_ wedding, which is just tacky," Santana says, rolling her eyes. Blaine tries very hard to swallow his chuckle at the wave of laughter which greets this, and Kurt narrowing his eyes at her. Apparently her famous bitchiness comes out when she's hungover and sleep-deprived. "And what you've been doing looks less like celebrating and more like staking a claim. But then, we all know how much you like hickies."

Blaine coughs loudly, and Jane glances at him before she hastily says, "Where's Rachel? I thought she'd be down pretty early to keep to her routine." He gives her a grateful look, and she smiles and briefly lays her hand over his beneath the table.

"She was really drunk last night, I wouldn't be surprised if she's currently worshipping the porcelain throne, as they say," Dani says with a roll of her eyes, refilling her and Madison's glasses of orange juice. "I mean, I have never seen her that drunk. She went from lying on the grass to a screaming rage, and getting her into the car was the hardest thing I have ever to do." Leaning her head briefly against Madison's shoulder, she says, "Babe, we are never having kids."

"Suits me, we can be the cool aunts," Madison says with a wink to her brother. "So Rachel's down, but where's Elliott? I don't think he was that drunk, and he had disappeared by about half two." And then she smirks slowly and says, "Speak of the devil," and a chorus of wolf-whistles sounds as Elliott and Dave slink in, hand-in-hand. Both of them are blushing, but they look incredibly pleased with themselves, and Blaine shoots Dave a thumbs up. "Good for you, boys!"

"Our wedding was a place for people to find their happy endings, babe!" Brittany says, grinning at the two men as they sit down next to each other, Elliott smiling softly and laying his hand over Dave's on the table. Despite rolling her eyes, Santana smiles and presses a gentle kiss to Brittany's cheek. As everyone settles back down again, Mercedes smacking Sam across the back of the head when he whistles again, Brittany turns to Kurt and asks, "Are you having an engagement party? Because you have to wait until San and I are back from Barcelona, otherwise it's not fair."

"Oh God, Kurt, do not make me sit through an engagement party," comes Rachel's voice as she storms in. She still looks angry, last night's eyeliner smeared under her eyes and making them look darker than usual as they flash with anger. "It's one thing to listen to you make that little speech and accept the guy's proposal at someone else's wedding," she's sneering, and Blaine isn't the only one who almost drops his cutlery in shock at the sheer  _venom_  in her voice, "but you can't expect us to all sit through a whole night celebrating your  _love_  for each other."

"Uh, Rachel, you're acting like a total tool right now," Spencer says, and a low hum of agreement lifts the air around the table. "Look, if you don't like Walter, you're entitled to that. But Kurt just got engaged, meaning he's found someone he loves enough to marry after all the shit he's been through, so I think he deserves his friends being happy for him."

"But-"

"No, Rachel, no but!" Spencer suddenly shouts, and Blaine stares around at the sudden confrontation happening over their quiet breakfast. "What kind of shitty friends would we be if we all sat here and told Kurt he shouldn't marry a kind man who he loves after what we all know he's been through? You'd have to be a sick, sick person to tell Kurt he should take that ring off and go back to being alone. The entire time I have known him, I've thought 'there is someone who should be getting loved by someone who is amazing enough to deserve him', and now Kurt has that. If you can't accept that, I can't help but think it's because you're afraid of being left now your closest friends are married and engaged."

Rachel looks suddenly stricken, her eyes filling with tears, and the silence stretches out like a spool of thread, long and thin, as she clatters her cup down on the table, tea splashing everywhere, and runs out of the room. Blaine could almost swear he hears a sob as she leaves, but it might just be his imagination. "Jesus, Spence, way to open old wounds," Roderick observes, and Spencer winces guiltily. "You better go apologise before Jesse comes after you."

"Do you guys really have that much of a problem with me and Walter?" They all look at Kurt, his voice small and meek after the confident way he breezed in. He doesn't look so proud anymore, the shirt he's wearing buttoned high and the collar turned up to hide his lovebites. Actually, he looks utterly heartbroken, and it pulls painfully at Blaine's heart to see the pain behind his eyes. "San, Britt, I'm sorry, I...I didn't think, I just wanted him to know I love him, I'm sorry I made your day about me and him. It was selfish, I should've waited."

"Kurt, you don't need to apologise," Santana says gently, and Brittany nods along next to her. "I understand Walter didn't want anyone to know until after we got married - well, we did. The ceremony was long before you said yes to that gorgeous ring and we had our moment in the spotlight. It's your turn now." She smiles softly, and continues, "And we are all so happy for you. You went through hell and back with Jason, and seeing you in love with someone I know is going to treat you like the absolute prince you are just makes my day. You're the best man in my life and I am happy that you're happy."

"Beautifully said, Mrs. Pierce-Lopez." Everyone turns to face the new arrival, and Blaine can't help a small smile as Kurt's face lights up at the sight of Walter. "If we weren't both spoken for and of completely the wrong sexualities, I would kiss you." Santana grins, and Brittany lets out a soft sigh next to her as Walter crosses straight across the room and kisses him softly, leaving a dazed look in Kurt's eyes when he pulls away. "You know, sweetheart, you're just as beautiful this morning as you were the day we met."

"I love you," Kurt breathes, and there are smiles around the table when Kurt gently presses his lips to Walter's once again - except for Blaine. Knowing that those same lips were on his last night, greedy and passionate, makes guilt twist hotly in his stomach, the heat rising into his throat and making it impossible to swallow.

As they all eat breakfast together - Rachel eventually joins them, very quiet and very close to Jesse, her eyes a little swollen and rimmed with red - and return to their rooms to pack and change before waving Santana and Brittany off on their honeymoon, it's hours before Blaine gets a chance to be alone with Kurt. It's only when they finally get back to the house that Blaine manages to get Kurt alone for a few minutes, while his parents are rearranging their belongings in their drawers and quietly talking.

"Kurt, don't you think we need to talk about what happened last night?" Blaine asks, keeping his voice quiet so no one overhears them. When Kurt just tilts his head at him, narrowing his eyes in confusion. "What happened with...us?"

"Kurt, Blaine, can we talk to you?!" Pam calls, and Blaine almost curses when Kurt immediately runs off. He was so  _close_  to being able to get him alone and actually talk about what happened. Pam is smiling when they both catch up to her, and Blaine can almost guess what she's going to say. "Blainey, my little dove, your father and I have decided that the time has come for things around this house to change. Now don't laugh, but I've been trying out some online dating lately, and I've met someone who I would like to start meeting up with. And now your father and Kurt are getting married, so we're thinking-"

"Maybe you'd like to move in with me?" Walter asks in a rush, words tumbling over each other, eyes fixed firmly on Kurt. Kurt's jaw drops, and there's obvious uncertainty in his eyes. "It doesn't have to be for long, just until the end of summer. But if we're getting married, then living together is a trial run, and I'd like to do it even for a few weeks. You spend a lot of time here anyway, honey, so maybe we could try it out. Our lifestyles might not be compatible."

"I'd have to talk to my parents," Kurt says quietly. "But I'll think about it." He smiles then, lifting the hand bearing the silver engagement ring to cup Walter's cheek as he leans in for a soft kiss that Blaine watches with an unpleasant stirring in his stomach. "I think I'll hang around for a while before I go home, and I need to call Rachel to apologise and patch things up."

"Come upstairs, there's much better cell service," Blaine says, slightly desperate to talk to him. Kurt obediently follows him, and once they're out of earshot of his parents Blaine says, "Kurt, we need to talk about what happened when I drove you back to the hotel last night."

"Oh, was it you that drove me back?" Kurt asks, looking pleasantly surprised. "I remember fighting with Rachel, and Santana coming to get me and refusing to drink the water she tried to give me. I remember someone driving me home - you, obviously - and then I think I slipped on the stairs because Spencer found me sitting there singing and made me go back to his and Alistair's room to sober up a bit. They kept me for about half an hour, then I went back to my room and Walter woke up when I came in so I spent time with him."

"You don't remember coming up to my room?" Blaine asks, and his heart breaks a little, he can't help it. Those kisses that made the whole world explode into fireworks, those kisses that set his soul alight, those kisses that made his heart skip and his breath shorten - it was just because Kurt was drunk. He doesn't even remember the way he touched Blaine, the way he made his body sing. "You don't remember coming to see me?"

Kurt just shakes his head. "I'm sorry, Blaine. I have no idea what you're talking about."


	8. Don't You Dare Look Back

Thank you so much for your continuing support! Hopefully you'll all continue to enjoy the ride :)

**Warning: references to a past abusive relationship, appearance of an abusive figure. If you are triggered by this but still want to know what happens, let me know and I will offer a version of events which does not include the situation involving these warnings.**

* * *

Blaine wakes up to yet another Facebook notification lighting up his phone screen:  **Jane Hayward posted 5 photos with you**. Cursing his decision to add Kurt's friends in trickles after the wedding rather than all at once, he picks up his phone to check the pictures, arms outstretched and phone high over his face. He's running a serious risk of it falling onto his nose, but it's too early to care about that - why on  _earth_  is Jane posting new pictures to Facebook at seven o'clock in the morning?

Yet, despite the early hour, he can hear singing drifting down from the bathroom, beautiful singing over the roar of the shower. Sitting up straight, he smiles softly as he listens to Kurt performing  _Defying Gravity_  for the benefit of the shower head, and changes to the background noise of him cycling through his repertoire. When Blaine leaves his room, hair carefully gelled flat and outfit impeccably neat, he catches Kurt stepping out of the shower, only in a towel wrapped carelessly around his hips, and his breath catches in his throat with a stutter in the gentle rise and fall of his chest. Kurt is so beautiful, with his moon-pale skin and bright eyes emphasised by his pinkened cheeks, hair dark with water and plastered against his head. He looks younger, vulnerable without his hair styled high and his clothes chosen to make him look fierce and confident, and this way Blaine notices the freckles on his cheeks multiplying with the summer and the shyness in the way he folds his arms over his chest self-consciously. "Good morning," he says, a little too brightly, and Blaine just smiles.

"Happy engagement party day," he says, the words a little stiff in his throat, and Kurt's face softens. "Is what I'm wearing suitable? You said it would be casual rather than formal, so I thought this wouldn't look so bad."

"It's perfect, Blaine, you look wonderful," Kurt says softly, and Blaine grins at him. God, if he hadn't pushed Kurt away after the wedding, perhaps he could've had this. Kurt fresh from the shower, smelling of aftershave and soap, droplets of water clinging to his skin, that towel hanging low and loose on his hips. Maybe he could've pressed his lips to Kurt's, softened by the steam, and kissed him breathless, let his hands trail until he reached the towel, and waited for Kurt's breathy permission to pull it away. The real Kurt, in front of him, clears his throat and says, "I guess I'll have to work hard on my outfit. Man of the hour, I have to look the part."

"Didn't you vote yes for the wedding dresses Brittany and Santana looked so beautiful in?" Blaine teases, and Kurt just nods, smiling slightly. "You'll look fantastic no matter what you wear, Kurt. I for one can't wait to see what semi-casual looks all of your friends come up with. The Warblers I've invited back to sing with us don't know the meaning of the words 'informal occasion', so it should be interesting."

"Didn't you guys ever just all gather at someone's house and drink after a performance?" Kurt asks, leaning on the doorway to Walter's room - and his, Blaine supposes, even if he's only living with them part-time. "Didn't you go out to parties and get incredibly drunk and share things your friends still use as blackmail material to this day?"

"We used to sit in the common room after performances and drink gin and tonic," Blaine says, and he notices the quiver of Kurt's mouth as he tries to swallow a laugh. "We were a very stereotypical all-male boarding school. But we've been rehearsing over Skype, and we have a really great number to honour you and my dad."

"If you can drag Dave away from Elliott long enough to get him to perform," Kurt remarks with a roll of his eyes, and Blaine giggles. "The whole time I've known him, Elliott has never gotten further than a third date with a guy, and suddenly he's head over heels for someone he's only know a few weeks,"

"Didn't you two ever go more than three dates?" Blaine asks, unthinking, and then slaps a hand over his mouth in horror.

"So Santana really did tell you everything," Kurt muses, a shadow falling across his face. "I knew she'd tell you about Jason, but not Elliott."

"I asked, Kurt, I wanted to know what had happened in the past with you two, the way you were so flirty at the wedding," Blaine says quickly, but Kurt seems to shrug whatever the cloud was off, and smiles at him.

"We never called them dates," he explains, a small smile on his face. "We just went out, dancing or drinking or for dinner, and more times than not we went back to his place and we'd have sex. He...he was what I needed. He was gentle, and he didn't push, and when I let him break down my walls he was so passionate and sexy and perfect. Elliott was the one who showed me what sex was really like, what desire is, what it means to  _want_  someone like that. We weren't in love, he was my best friend, but what we had was amazing. What we had helped me so much, and I...I don't think I could even be with Walter if it wasn't for the help Elliott gave me."

"Does my dad know about all of this?" Blaine asks, and he can see the answer in Kurt's guarded eyes and the way he seems to shrink in on himself. "I know he knows there's been a bad relationship in your past, but does he know the details? Does he knows the...the  _things_  Jason did to you? Does he know how Elliott helped you?"

"No, look, he doesn't know," Kurt says, looking up with a sheen of tears in his eyes. "When you've just started dating someone you don't want to chase them away by casually dropping your abusive high school boyfriend into the conversation, and the more I fell in love the more I was worried about scaring him off. I just...I couldn't handle him hating me. I couldn't handle him not wanting me anymore because of this...this huge  _thing_  in my past, this giant weight I carry around with me, it's like a goddamn  _shadow_  following me around. I'll never get away from it, Blaine, it's always going to be there. The way my first kiss was just taken from me by someone who didn't love me, the way I lost my virginity, the sheer fact that  _that_  was my first relationship - it's part of me. Someone I knew in New York told me that no one would want me because of it."

"They were crazy, Kurt, your past isn't who you are," Blaine says reassuringly, going cold with horror when tears slip down Kurt's cheeks and he raises a hand to his face, covering his mouth as his shoulders shake. "Kurt, you know how much my dad loves you, he wouldn't want you carrying all of this around on your own. Okay, my whole life I've been told that marriage is a partnership - let him share the load. My dad is an amazing man, he's my hero, and he's not going to turn and run because of what's been done to you in the past. You didn't ask for any of that, he knows that. You are so strong, and so amazing, and my dad, he..." Choking up at the thought of his  _father_ , the way he looks at Kurt, and the betrayal that Blaine knows about, carries in his heart like a tattoo on his skin, and Kurt squeezes his shoulder gently. God, this is so stupid, Kurt is the one who everything was done to, and still he's trying to comfort Blaine. "Kurt, my dad loves you so much."

"I know, I know, and I love him," Kurt says, swiping at his tear-filled eyes. "God, I  _love_  him. You know he's the first person who's ever made me feel...so safe. I know he'll never, ever hurt me. He's sweet, and he's wonderful, and he cares about me, and that's why I said yes." With a sniff and a small smile, he adds, "Oh my God, I'm not going to have any words left to give a speech at this party."

"Just...just tell my dad everything you just said," Blaine says softly. "He has to know about your past, Kurt, what if it were to affect you further down the line? He can't be kept in the dark. You need to tell him how much it means to you to feel safe and loved in a relationship. I mean, he deserves to know all the good he's done for you, because, believe me, you've done so much good for him."

Another doors opens, and Kurt stumbles backwards into his room with a flush creeping into his cheeks, and Blaine turns with a smile to face his mother, smiling at him and already dressed for the party. "Mom, what time is Lorraine arriving?" he asks, falling into step next to her as he becomes aware of how much his stomach is complaining that he hasn't yet eaten breakfast.

"Well, she text me last night to say they'd be on the road as soon as they can get organised from the motel, so I guess between half nine and ten," Pam says with a slight shrug. "Lorraine says Virginia is very excited to see you. How long has it been?"

"Probably since Christmas, and even then I only saw her for a day between Christmas and New Year's," Blaine says with a shrug, reaching up to get his  _Wicked_  mug from the trip to New York when he was ten down from the overhead cabinet. "And since she's off to London for her year out, I'll only get to see her over Skype for a long time." Corner of his mouth twisting up in a smile, he adds, "But I'm sure the Warblers will be glad to see her."

"Ah yes, I remember when they all used to talk about 'Blaine's hot cousin'," Pam says with a laugh, slotting bread into the toaster and switching the radio on. "It's just as well you never had a sister, she wouldn't have fared well around your high school friends. Anyway, what exactly are your plans with the Warblers?"

"It's a secret!" Blaine says, and Pam rolls her eyes at him fondly. "But, rest assured, Dad is going to love it. They were all for it when I called around and told them my dad is getting married and is hiring glee club alumni to sing at the engagement party."

Blaine has finished his waffles, cleaned up and managed to watch an hour of terrible daytime TV when the door clatters open and a streak of red hair and a T-shirt emblazoned with  _SOME PEOPLE ARE GAY, GET OVER IT!_  in bold black typeface launches itself into his arms. "Blainey!" Virginia shrieks in his ear, making him wince. "Why has it been so long?!"

"Because I've spent the last year in New York while you've been in Pennsylvania?" Blaine suggests, and Virginia rolls her eyes at him before hugging him again, even tighter. "Still, I've missed you, Gin. But you might want to change before the time for the party actually comes."

"Duh, I brought a nice dress, but I'm not going to sit in the car wearing it!" Virginia says, rolling her eyes expressively. "And from what I saw of the pictures you put on Facebook, some of Kurt's friends are really cute. Add that to your private school buddies, and I have incredible motivation to look extra good this afternoon."

"Good God, Virginia, I tremble imagining you in England next year," Lorraine says as she breezes in, and Pam laughs and gives Blaine a pointed look as she goes to embrace her friend. "And where are the men of the hour?"

"Good morning, you look wonderful," comes Walter's voice as he walks in, Kurt trailing one step behind and holding tightly to his hand. Kurt's eyes are rimmed with red, and there's an obvious muscle ticking in Walter's jaw, but they stand close to each other and Walter kisses Kurt's temple sweetly while they're talking to Lorraine. "I'm so glad you three could make it here."

After a long, lazy morning hanging around each other in the front room, no one asking why Kurt looks so upset or why Walter is standing so protectively close to him, they drive to the hotel one of Walter's old friends owns, the parking lot already heaving with friends and family of both men. Catching up to Dave and Elliott, climbing out of a car shared with Madison, Dani, Mason and Jane, Blaine nudges him in the side and points out Cooper and Natalie, looking as if a grey cloud should be hanging over their heads. "You should tell someone to hook up with them," Dani says as they walk into the hotel, Mason immediately twirling Jane onto the dance floor to the quiet music issuing from the speakers on either side of the stage,

The room is full to bursting, the colours of everyone's clothes flashing in the subtle hotel lighting, when Santana jumps onto the stage and takes the microphone, smiling around at the room. "I think, in my capacity as future maid of honour, I have to be the one to tell you that Kurt and Walter are very happy that all of you have come out here today to celebrate their love for each other. I've only known Walter a matter of months, but the fact that he drove myself, Kurt and Rachel home hours after meeting us because we were too drunk to get home any other way shows me that he is exactly the kind of gentleman that my favourite guy in the world deserves. So, allow us all to entertain you tonight, and please sit back and enjoy it. And don't forget to congratulate the happy couple."

"Yeah, you better congratulate me!" Kurt shouts, raising his glass, and there's a roar of laughter before Puck jumps up onto the stage and takes the microphone, glass of champagne in hand and smiling at Kurt in Walter's arms.

"I've known Kurt for a long time, and in all of those years I've never seen him this happy," he says softly, and Kurt simply beams at him. "When he called around in February to say 'Hey, I'm seeing someone new, I want you to meet him', our entire friend group was frowning and worried. But, I can now stand here in front of you all and say that seeing the way Walter treats him and loves him has taken all our doubts away. I can't wait to get to stand up as Kurt's best man and tell three hundred people about what a beautiful, loving relationship theirs is."

Pushing up onto the stage and gently prising the microphone out of Puck's hand, Kurt gives the room a smile and says, "As much as I love my friends, and love the fact that all of them are so desperate to tell all of you all my best qualities, if I let every single one of them make a speech we'll be here all night, so let's just get this party started!" Grinning softly, he waits for the cheering and whooping to die down before he raises his glass and says, "After I make my speech."

"Boo!" Puck shouts out among the theatrical groans, and Kurt sticks his tongue out at him.

"Many of you will remember my vodka-fuelled rants when Santana and Brittany got back together, telling so many of you that I was never going to find anyone who would love me the way I want to be loved, let alone someone I could love back in that hopeless romantic way I've suppressed for so long," he says, and Blaine leans on his hand, glancing at Santana and Brittany dreamily leaning into each other, Burt beaming up at Kurt, Walter's eyes bright with love and his smile so unerringly proud. "People dream about meeting the person they'll fall in love with in some incredible coincidental way - my coincidence just happened to be that the lovely man sitting at the head table happened to be driving past Scandals when I was too drunk to stay inside in the crazy heat." Laughter lifts the room, Burt laughing the hardest, and Kurt smiles softly. "I just feel so lucky that I found someone so early in my life, and I am fortunate enough that he loves me too and wants to marry me. Walter, honey, with you, I feel safer than I ever have before. I know that you are never going to hurt me, and you will love me for as long as we both shall live." Prompting sighs as he raises a hand to wipe away his tears on the edge of his sleeve, Kurt gulps, raises his glass and says, "Here's to us. And now the revelry can begin."

With people wandering up to the bar and Myron up on the stage entertaining everyone with a rendition of  _I Really Like You_ , Blaine enjoys the gentle flow of conversation around the head table, with Kurt and Walter surrounded by Burt, Carole, Pam, Santana, Brittany, Puck and Quinn. "So, girls, how was your honeymoon?" Carole asks, smiling softly at Santana and Brittany.

"It was  _amazing_ ," Brittany says, starry-eyed and sipping from her glass of champagne. "I mean, thank God for the expectation that you go on a holiday after organising a wedding in four and a half months and spend one week soaking up the Spanish sun." Turning to Kurt, she smiles and asks, "Speaking of wedding timelines, have you talked about dates yet?"

"Well, since we've only been engaged for a week and a half, we haven't," Kurt answers sweetly, smiling when Walter presses a kiss to his cheek. "But why rush to get a whole wedding organised when we can just wait? I mean, come September I'll be going back to college, so I'm thinking maybe after I graduate, so we have time to talk about where we'll live and things."

"I was kinda thinking next winter, I've always wanted a winter wedding," Walter says, Kurt turning a dreamy-eyed gaze on him. "I can't wait to organise it all, do it properly this time. And I can't wait to do it with you."

"Well, I for one cannot wait for the bachelor party," Quinn says, and winks at a laughing Pam as she refills her champagne glass. "That night was the best part of organising San and Britt's wedding. I mean, I always love getting Santana drunk, but watching her cry because the glitter in Elliott's hair was so pretty was just a new level."

"And what about you, Q?" Brittany retorts, arching an eyebrow and gleefully grinning. "As I recall, you called Kitty several choice names when she took the vodka bottle away from you."

"You know, I don't think I'm gonna have a bachelor party," Kurt says, taking a sip of his champagne and ignoring the horrified looks being sent his way. "They're tacky, it's more money to spend, and it's just an excuse to get drunk, ogle strangers in thongs and share far too much information about your sex life."

"And how exactly did you spend my bachelorette party, Hummel?" Santana asks, smirking at the blush that creeps up Kurt's neck. "Sipping an iced water in the corner and silently judging our antics with that nostril flaring thing you do? I seem to recall someone spending about forty minutes telling us some very personal things that we will forever use for blackmail material."

"Okay, but the most important decision is the first dance song," Brittany says, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear with her left hand, wedding and engagement rings flashing in the lights swirling overhead. "It has to be the perfect song for you as a couple, a song that means something to you. You know Santana and I chose  _Songbird_  because it was the song she sang to confess her feelings for me all those years ago."

"Well, you know I've only ever wanted to take my first dance with my husband to one song," Kurt says, and Brittany tilts her head at him with a slight pointed lift of her eyebrows. " _Come What May_  from Moulin Rouge."

"Really?!" Blaine exclaims, turning wide eyes on Kurt. "I love that song. Why would you pick that one in particular?"

Leaning against Walter with a small smile, Kurt smiles and says, "I just think it's the most romantic song in the world. I've waited my whole life to feel like that."

"Oh, Kurt, you and your theory that singing that with someone would be a more intimate act than sex," comes a voice from behind their table, and they all turn to face Sugar, twisting a curl around her fingers and directing the whole radiance of her smile at Blaine. "Blaine, will you come and dance with me?"

Taking the manicured hand she offers, and shrugging at the questioning look Quinn shoots him, Blaine finds out her ulterior motive for asking him to dance after about thirty seconds. "Is your stepbrother single?" Sugar asks, eyes bright and eager, and Blaine has to try very hard to swallow his laughter. "I just think he's really cute, and he's an actor and he's older and so mature, I mean, older guys are so much better, I know exactly why Kurt's marrying your dad."

"Um, Sugar...yes, as far as I know, Cooper is single," Blaine answers when Sugar pauses for breath, voice strained from trying so hard not to laugh. "But I'm not sure if you want to get involved with either of my stepsiblings, he's kind of a jerk and you're too sweet for that."

Right on cue, Dani and Madison dance up to them, and Madison is giggling as she shouts, "Did you know Jake is outside making out with your stepsister?" over the music. "He thinks he's some kind of cougar magnet now. He wouldn't listen to Ryder telling him twenty nine is not old enough to be a cougar."

"If Jake's kissing your stepsister, you have to let me go after Cooper!" Sugar insists, and Blaine can see Madison hiding her face in Dani's shoulder to conceal how much she's laughing. "Please, Blaine, he looks so miserable over there. I just know I could cheer him up!"

"You don't need my permission to go after him, Sugar, but go with my blessing," Blaine says, and she squeals and kisses him on the cheek before she races off to the sour-faced man sitting on the sidelines.

"Didn't I tell you to find people to hook the evil stepsiblings up with?" Dani asks, Madison raising her bright red face from Dani's shoulder. "You just watch those doors, any moment Jake will come in ostentatiously wiping off lipstick. Keep an eye on the staircase up to the rooms later, people will be vanishing upstairs to hook up. Twenty dollars Jake sleeps with Natalie."

"To be fair," comes Mason's voice as he drifts over to join them, glancing back at Jane dancing with Wes with a small smile, taking Blaine's hands and spinning him around, "she's pretty hot, I would if she wasn't such a bitch. She looks like her mother. Your dad certainly lucked out with finding attractive spouses, Blaine." Laughing, Blaine lets Mason twirl him under his arm. "And Kitty smacked me with her purse until I promised to tell you there's a single gay guy here, and as the only single man here with the correct sexuality you get dibs."

"Oh, speak of the devil," Dani murmurs softly, and then raises her voice to say, "You guys want drinks? Come on, Mace, help me carry it all." She darts away, dragging Madison behind her, and Mason gives Blaine one last spin to face the man standing just behind them, thumbs casually tucked into his belt and watching them with a small smirk playing at the corners of his mouth.

"Nice to see people are spreading the word that I'm single," he says, and Blaine just nods, wishing they hadn't left him alone, defenseless against the gaze flickering slowly and obviously up and down his body. "Sebastian Smythe. I've heard all about you, Blaine Anderson."

"Okay, how do you know who I am?" Blaine asks, folding his arms and giving this man, obviously used to being able to seduce someone with a mere few words, an unimpressed look. "Are you one of Kurt's friends? He's never mentioned you."

"Gosh no, my father works above yours, making ridiculous amounts of money and never being around," Sebastian says with an airy wave of his hand. "But the whole office and their mothers know about your father's recent divorce, his new boyfriend, and the son he's stupidly proud of considering there's no blood relation. When the invitation to this little party came through the door, my bigot of a mother obviously told my dad there was no way he was going, but since I'm already a disgrace, I decided to head for a party where there might be hot guys. Seems like my expectations have been exceeded." With a smirk in Blaine's direction, eyes gleaming, he asks, "Can I get you a drink?"

"I don't drink," Blaine says sharply, but he knows he can't just throw Sebastian aside. Spending his entire summer pining after Kurt isn't going to get him anywhere, particularly at a party celebrating the fact that Kurt is engaged. "But maybe we'll go sit outside and you can tell me a little more about yourself before I'm performing with the Warblers."

Grinning, Sebastian grabs a bottle of wine and sweeps him outside. The evening sun is still hot, beating down on the mostly empty tables that look out over the hotel garden, a riot of colours, and Blaine can't help sneaking appraising glances when Sebastian slips his blazer off. He's handsome, and that first little spark of desire creeps into Blaine's blood, making his cheeks flush. "So, my story," Sebastian says, settling into the chair. "Well, my father pays my way but is always travelling, and my mother spends her days polishing the silverware and entertaining lovers while ignoring her gay disappointment of an only son. They packed me off to boarding school in France to learn to be cultured and debonair, so I've only really been home in Westerville for summers and Christmas. My father supports my choices, but he's not around enough to defend me, so I do that myself. Now I'm at Harvard, on the fast track to becoming a lawyer. You?"

Blinking at him once, Blaine collects himself and says, "My father got divorced from his first wife and married my mom while she was pregnant with me, and I was raised by them. I went to Dalton Academy for the anti-bullying policies after an incident at my first high school, became the lead singer of the Warblers, won Nationals and now I'm at NYU and live my friends in New York. Not much else to tell."

"No boyfriend?" Sebastian asks, and Blaine just shakes his head. "Thank God, that means you won't be mortally offended when I ask you to save a dance for me."

"What if I gave you all of my dances?" Blaine asks, and he smiles at the way Sebastian's eyes light up. "I mean, there's no one else here interested in me, and it doesn't have to be anything more than a one time thing due to the atmosphere of an engagement party."

Sebastian's next words are interrupted by Kurt grabbing at Blaine's arm, leaning down to press his mouth against Blaine's ear, making him shiver, and murmuring, "Blaine, please don't get involved. This is exactly the type of guy you meet at these parties and never hear from again."

"Congratulations on your engagement," Sebastian says smoothly, and Kurt glares at him across the table. "It's such an honour to be able to see two people celebrate their love for each other. And, of course, to meet charming people such as yourself, Kurt."

Kurt just glares at him, and turns on his heel to march back inside, and Blaine just stares after him in shock. "Must be the stress of a new engagement and organising this party," he finally says, and Sebastian just raises his eyebrows. "Don't, he's my friend."

The sounds of Rachel singing  _Pumpin' Blood_  are echoing from inside the hotel, and Sebastian holds out a hand. "Dance with me?" Blaine nods and smiles, shaking off Kurt's voice and his words and his earnest eyes, and laughs when Mason and Madison both offer him thumbs up as Sebastian spins him onto the dancefloor.

When Rachel is finished singing, back in Jesse's arms and carefully avoid eye contact with Kurt - they haven't spoken since her outburst the morning after Brittany and Santana's wedding - Mercedes takes the stage and announces, "I know that by the end of the evening there will have been so many love songs that we're all sick of hearing them, but this is a celebration of love and I want to honour it." Everyone recognises the opening notes of  _Love Me Like You Do_ , and Blaine stays in Sebastian's arms, smiling at the grins he gets from the people surrounding him.

Until Mercedes abruptly stops singing, the backing music grinding to a halt, her eyes wide and mouth dropped open and gaze staring at the entrance to the room. Blaine turns around, but within a second a crowd is surging around, and there's a lot of sudden shouting. With lightning-fast reflexes. Quinn grabs Santana by the arm as her eyes flash with anger, and Blaine can only crane to see what's going on. And then Kurt answers it all, his voice shaking and knuckles white with how hard he's clinging to Walter. "Jason, what...why the  _hell_  are you here?"

"Isn't this a celebration?" Jason asks softly, and Blaine can almost see how people were fooled by him the first time they met him. Looking at him, he wouldn't think he was capable of all the horrible things he did. He just looks like a normal guy. "Don't you want all the people close to your heart here?"

"Fuck off, you asshole!" Puck shouts from where he's struggling in Mike's iron grip, face twisted with loathing.

"How dare you come in here and try to ruin this day for us all!" Santana screams, Quinn's nails digging into her arms to keep her in place. "How the fuck did you even find out about this?"

"Small town like this, the paper still prints engagement announcements," Jason says, tucking his hands casually into his pockets. "I was surprised to see that you'd moved home, Kurt. New York not the land of opportunity you wanted? I did tell you moving there was a waste of time." He steps closer, to Mason and Spencer and Roderick falling into place like a wall, and just smiles at Kurt as if he's prey. "I can't believe you said yes to this. Are you so unlovable that you have to attach yourself to someone so much older? I knew it, I always knew it. You were never enough to find someone decent.

Blaine can only glance around at the room, so many people frozen in horror, Carole with a soothing hand on Burt's shoulder, Rachel clinging to Jesse with all the colour gone from her face, and Kurt starting to cry, absolutely stricken. Kissing his temple softly, Walter pushes his way to Jason, standing there with a smug look on his face like some pantomime villain. "How dare you come in here and try to ruin this day for Kurt," he says, and Blaine has never heard his father sound so angry in all his life, cold and steely. "You have no right to show your face after what you did to him. You can leave him alone, turn around and leave, or I can call the police. You don't get to keep hurting him."

"Whatever, grandpa, this relationship isn't going to last," Jason says, rolling his eyes disdainfully. "You'll realise that Kurt is just this sad, untalented, hopeless little thing who's only clinging to you because he's afraid to be alone. He's impossible to love."

The next few seconds seem to last years, and then flash by in the blink of an eye. Jason is on the floor, clutching his nose as blood starts to smear across his palm, and people are shouting, and Sam is standing on a chair applauding over the hubbub. Blaine is aware of how tightly he's clutching Sebastian's shoulders, his jaw hanging open and his eyes wide as he stares at Walter standing over Jason, breathing heavily. "I love my beautiful, talented, intelligent, deserving fiancé more than anything," he snaps. "Now get out."

Santana whoops, breaking out of Quinn's grip, and her and Puck drag Jason outside, Burt following them with his phone pressed to his ear. The crowds stays quiet and still, shocked, as Kurt approaches Walter, wiping his tear-filled eyes on the edge of his sleeve. "Are you okay?" he asks softly, cradling Walter's hand in his. "Did you hurt yourself? Oh my God, honey, you shouldn't have done that."

"I don't care," Walter says, and cups Kurt's face, the moment so intimate that Blaine can't help but shift uncomfortably, wishing he was anywhere else but here. "Nobody gets to talk about you like that. You are the most incredible man, Kurt Hummel, and I will keep believing that completely for the rest of my life. I love you so much."

"I love you too." The noise picks up again when Kurt kisses Walter full on the mouth, passionate and deep, and Blaine gestures to his high friends and they gather close to the stage.

"Where the hell is David?" he asks, looking at the crowd surrounding him.

"Probably reading Virginia the list of the ninety-nine reasons she should sleep with him tonight," Wes says sourly, and Blaine swallows laughter again when David appears, glaring at the back of Wes' head as they take up their positions on the stage and slide easily into their tried and tested rendition of  _Silly Love Songs_. They cycle through  _When I Get You Alone_ ,  _Teenage Dream_ ,  _Live While We're Young_  and  _Glad You Came_  before they go back to the bar and their dates, and Sebastian is there, staring at Blaine with the kind of look he recognises with a heavy sigh.

"I knew there had to be a reason you were coming to this thing without a date," Sebastian says with a knowing smirk, and Blaine can only nod. He knows, there's no point denying it. "So, Blaine, we've danced together, we've talked, we get along, and we are two attractive guys. The way I see it, you have two options: you can stay down here, all night, dancing with all these people and sneaking glances and Kurt and being seriously fucking miserable since you don't even have booze to dull the pain; or, you can come upstairs with me and we can have a little fun. I won't ask for anything more than you're comfortable with, but you look tense enough to make me wonder how long it's been since you got laid."

"Over a year," Blaine says without thinking, and flushes when Sebastian lets out a soft whistle. "Okay, fine, I'll come upstairs with you. But I'm not staying over in your room or anything."

"Wouldn't ask you to," Sebastian says, and takes Blaine's hand to take him upstairs. Catching Madison's eye, Blaine winks at her and laughs at the way the smirk spreads across her face joyfully.

The only time Blaine's ever slept with anyone was when he was dating Dave during senior year, and he can't deny that it's nice to have a hot guy wanting him, kissing him against the door and backing him towards the door, undressing him and kissing his neck and licking his nipples and palming him through his jeans. It feels good, how it's supposed to, and Sebastian isn't a bad kisser. He's good, making Blaine groan into their kisses and move his hips for more. But he's not what Blaine's been dreaming about, and he can't help thinking about how he's throwing all his principles about one night stands out fo the window as he lies there with a man he's only known a few hours jerking him off. Still, it could be worse - at least he's stuck to his promise not to drink after the disaster of the Valentine's night out with Tina, Artie and Dave.

Sebastian sucks him expertly, and it takes minutes for Blaine to come down, lying naked on the bed and watching Sebastian move around. "I think I needed that," he says faintly, and Sebastian just smiles. "Thanks."

"My pleasure," Sebastian says with a smirk. "No pressure, but we'll both be here all night, so if you decide it's time to stop pining for someone you definitely can't have and have some fun, my phone is just waiting for your number."

Cleaning himself up as best he can in the tiny bathroom, Blaine waltzes back downstairs to Santana waiting for him, smirking as she grabs him and examines the slight bruise rising on his neck. "You little harlot, Blaine Anderson!" she shrieks with glee. "I would not have guessed you'd be the type."

Grinning and batting her away, Blaine looks up at the stage. Rachel is smiling down at Kurt, and Santana hurriedly explains, "She made a lovely speech and they made up. Bets are already being made for how long the truce lasts." Kurt is swaying gently with Walter to Rachel's  _The Only Exception_ , but he meets Blaine's eyes across the crowded room. He notices his messy hair, his loosened bowtie, his shirt not buttoned to the top.

And his eyes are full of something like sadness in the summer sunlight.


	9. Putting My Defences Up

**Warnings for this chapter: medical emergency**

* * *

 

**Groupchat: Kurt Hummel, Rachel Berry, Santana Pierce-Lopez, Brittany Pierce-Lopez, Noah Puckerman, Quinn Fabray**

**Brittany: Have you guys realised 50% of this chat is married or engaged?**

**Santana: Better get a move on with the ring, Puckerman. You're getting left behind ;)**

**Quinn: I don't need a ring, Lopez. Just because you wanted to race down the aisle doesn't mean everyone does.**

**Santana: *I'm* racing down the aisle? What about Kurt? He's known this guy for five months and they're getting married.**

**Rachel: I thought we agreed no more bitching!**

**Santana: I'm not bitching, I'm stating fact. You were the one screaming at my wedding. Five months just doesn't seem like enough time to get to know the person you're going to marry.**

**Kurt: And lots of people would say marrying your high school sweetheart is a terrible idea, so shut your mouth and keep your judgements to yourself. All of you.**

**Brittany: Aw, Kurt, we're just worried about you. You're like a baby bird to us. We need to teach you how to fly.**

**Quinn: Given that some birds push their chicks out of the nest to learn how to fly or die, Britt, that's maybe not the best metaphor. And I think we need to change the subject, because if you all start talking about this it's just going to end in a fight.**

**Rachel: Santana makes a good point, but when you fall in love you fall in love. If we could control who we fall in love with life would be so much easier.**

**Kurt: Maybe Walter and I don't know every single detail about each other, but in a way that's amazing. I can find out new things about him every single day, and nothing I've found out yet has made me want to leave him.**

**Quinn: I'm surprised his awful children didn't scare you off.**

**Kurt: Blaine is a perfect gentleman, he's been nothing but supportive of me and Walter! He's tried so hard since Walter introduced us to compensate for Cooper and Natalie!**

**Quinn: I was actually referring to Cooper and Natalie... Who, by the way, both came away from that engagement party looking very satisfied.**

**Santana: Jake is absolutely incorrigible. Just like Puck before you tamed him, Q.**

**Rachel: But can you really marry someone you don't know inside out, Kurt? What if you uncover something in a few years that ends in a messy divorce? There's always something that could make you stop loving someone.**

**Kurt: I love him. I don't think there's anything buried in his past that would make me stop loving him. For God's sake, he's not hiding who he is! He introduced me to his ex-wives weeks after we started dating!**

**Santana: But have you thought about what kind of effect this is going to have on your career?**

**Kurt: How is being married to someone older going to have any sort of effect on my career other than having someone to take to events?**

**Rachel: You're not looking at the big picture, Kurt! You're going back to college soon, and Walter isn't going to follow you. He'll be in Ohio, and you'll be in New York. Long-distance relationships are so difficult, and what if he doesn't want to move? His whole life is in Ohio, and you need to be based in New York for your career.**

**Kurt: We'll talk about it. His career is flexible, he can move around the country.**

**Rachel: But you can't just expect him to up and follow you around!**

**Noah: For God's sake, I'm trying to sleep! Can we all meet up with some wine and have this conversation when it's not two am?!**

**Quinn: I've told you a thousand times to put your phone on do not disturb when you're sleeping!**

**Santana: Please, please don't have your lover's tiff in the group chat.**

**Brittany: Night!**

**From: Santana**

**I'm sorry, Kurt, we're just worried about you. Marriage is a serious commitment, and I just can't help but think you've not thought it through. Is this really making you as happy as you could be? You keep biting our heads off and you just seem edgy all the time.**

**From: Kurt**

**If I tell you something, do you promise not to tell anyone else? Not even Brittany?**

**From: Santana**

**I promise. You can tell me anything, Kurt, I'm your best friend, your confidante. What's going on?**

* * *

It's late, the darkness pressing in and the stars concealed behind a veil of pale cloud, as Sebastian pulls up to the kerb and turns in his seat with a smile for Blaine, one he returns weakly. They've been doing this...this  _thing_  since the engagement party, and still it doesn't feel natural. It doesn't feel like he could just sink into it, just roll in the joy of having someone to hold, he's not opening up to the possibility of love, he's not falling into every touch. He's just...living it.

"How about me coming in tonight, babe," Sebastian says with a small smirk at the corners of his mouth, and Blaine just shakes his head. "Come on, your dad must have his piece of ass over all the time."

"Don't talk about Kurt like that," Blaine snaps immediately, and Sebastian just rolls his eyes and squeezes his fingers around the steering wheel. "Sebastian...what are we doing? Are we just hooking up, or are you expecting this to turn into a relationship? Because I...I just don't know if I can do that."

"You can't," Sebastian says immediately, and Blaine winces, feeling the tips of his ears flare red with shame as he sinks down in his seat. "But, as long as we're here, I'm perfectly happy to keep hooking up. You're hot, Blaine, and I like what we do together. I'm just not prepared to play second fiddle to another guy if we were to get serious."

Nodding in understanding, insides twisting with shame at the knowledge that he's too caught up in his crazy crush on his father's fiancé to even be able to consider a relationship with someone he finds attractive, someone who finds him attractive, someone who understands his body on some divine level, Blaine climbs out of the car and starts up the driveway. Sebastian catches up with him, and pauses on the porch, the lights from the hallway throwing strange shadows across his face. "I'll call you," he finally says, and Blaine just nods.

Sebastian leans in to kiss him, and Blaine can't help the relief that swoops through him, knowing that whatever he feels for Kurt can't affect this, the way he twists his fingers in Sebastian's hair and the tips of Sebastian's fingers rest on the back of his neck, pulling him a little closer. Sebastian always kisses him so deeply, no soft pecks or tender brushes of their lips, and Blaine feels his knees quiver as a strong arm wraps around his waist, keeping him upright. There's no comparison here, no intrusive thoughts - just the mouth on his, the hand warm against his skin, the body quickly becoming familiar against his own.

And then the door behind them flies open, and Blaine breaks the kiss for a blush to flood his face when he finds Kurt standing there, staring daggers at Sebastian with his arms firmly crossed over his chest. As he slowly lets his gaze wander up and down Kurt's body, Blaine's heart skips a beat and his breath gets caught in his throat at the simple beauty of Kurt's long, lithe body in tight jeans and his battered NYADA hoodie, hair wet and flat against his head, making him look younger and letting all the focus go to his eyes, gleaming bright with controlled anger. "Goodnight, Sebastian," he says firmly, and yanks Blaine inside, shutting the door behind them. "I can't believe you're still carrying on with him," he snaps, and Blaine fights not to betray how hot Kurt's voice, low in anger, almost a snarl, is. "He's just a playboy, he's going to hurt you and you deserve so much better than that. Your dad's really worried about you and him."

"Trust me, Kurt, I know exactly what his intentions are, and going our separate ways is not going to hurt me." Blaine says, and adds, "I've never been heartbroken over a boy." There's a quiet untruth to those words, but Kurt doesn't notice it, and instead fills a glass with ice with a lot of rattling, muttering to himself. "Why are you still awake? I said nobody had to wait up."

"Rachel called just after you left, the dad she hardly ever gets to see since the divorce is in town tomorrow and is taking her and Jesse for lunch," Kurt says, slotting bread into the toaster and glancing over at Blaine from beneath his lashes, making him suck in a breath and clench his fingers on the counter. "Basically, she can't come with me to my prior engagement tomorrow like she'd promised, and I need someone there with me. Want to come?" Noticing, perhaps, Blaine's confusion, he adds, "It's a glee club for elementary age children, I've been volunteering there all year. We'll go along, sing a few songs with them and have a great time. I promise they're sweet kids, no little monsters."

"Sounds great," Blaine says, and Kurt smiles at him. Honestly, to see Kurt's eyes soften and his lips curve up and those adorable dimples appear, Blaine would do just about anything. That smile twines through his dreams, and each perfect moment is infused with sadness, the knowing that Kurt is asleep in his father's arms just a wall away.

But he's going to get Kurt to himself for a whole day, and that thought has him springing out of bed in excitement, carefully styling his hair and choosing his clothes with the emphasis that he's about to spend a day around young children. Bright colours and the red bowtie patterned with pianos, and Kurt is grinning when he comes downstairs in search of breakfast. "Those kids are going to fawn all over you," he says, and Blaine can only laugh, filling his coffee mug and hopping onto a counter, watching Kurt make breakfast for the two of them. It's shockingly domestic, and it feels terrifyingly natural.

They have to leave before the rest of the house is even stirring, but Blaine is dizzy with the joy of being around Kurt, the way it's just so easy for them. As Blaine pulls away from the house, the radio is blaring and Kurt is singing along, rolling his window down for the cool morning air to rush into the car, making his gold neckerchief blow in the breeze. "You look amazing," Blaine says before he can even think to swallow the words, but it's worth it for the incredulous little smile on Kurt's face as he turns to him, smoothing his shirt down self-consciously.

"You're not so bad yourself," he says with a lift of one eyebrow, and Blaine just beams at him. It feels like a moment between a couple, like two people in love and in tune with one another - and then the sunlight flashes on Kurt's engagement ring, and Blaine refocuses on the road, trying to push down the swell of sadness.

The community centre is small from the outside, the morning sunlight splashing down on the planter boxes with their regiment of carefully colour-coordinated flowers, the trees swaying gently in the breeze. Giving his bowtie one last adjustment in the rearview mirror, Blaine jumps out of the car and can't help but smile at the way Kurt slides his sunglasses on. "You look like a runway model who got lost between LA and New York when you do that," he says, and Kurt smirks at him.

"Kurt!" The shriek comes from a small girl wearing a tutu in layers of neon pink and green, who charges at Kurt and nearly knocks him over. Smiling softly, Kurt waves at the man Blaine presumes is the little girl's father and puts an arm gently around her. "I missed you! We had to sing with Deb, I don't like her."

"I'm sorry, sweetie, two of my best friends got married and I got engaged," Kurt says, bending down to her level and smiling in a way that makes Blaine's heart skip a beat. "See, this is the ring my boyfriend gave me. Remember, you met him once when he picked me up after singing?"

"He was old!" the little girl says, and Kurt just grins at her, looking up to wink at Blaine. "Do you have pictures? Did your friends look very pretty? Can I wear your ring?"

"I'll show you the pictures, sweetie, but you can't wear my ring," Kurt says to her, and her tiny face falls. "It's very special to me, and even though I know you'd be very careful I don't want it to get lost or damaged, okay? It shows the whole world that I've promised to love someone for the rest of my life." Drawing her forward and showing her to hold out her hand, he says, "This is Blaine, he's going to help us out with some singing today. He's one of my closest friends and he's my fiancé's son. Blaine, this is Shawna."

"I'm his favourite," Shawna says with a wicked little grin, and Blaine laughs at Kurt's expression of horror as he shakes Shawna's hand, admiring her orange nail polish. "Come on, Kurt, we're going to be late! We were practising a song for you last week!"

Blaine can't help but be completely charmed by the group of children singing  _My Life Would Suck Without You_  to Kurt, dancing with youthful abandon and a complete lack of self-consciousness, grabbing Kurt and making him twirl with them, clinging onto his arms, all smiling up at him like he's the sun of their universe. Red-faced and out of breath from such exuberance, gently but firmly removing hands from his legs and the hem of his shirt, Kurt smiles at the gathering and settles himself gracefully onto the piano where Blaine is already sitting, fingers poised over the polished keys.

"So when I was sixteen, I visited New York for the first time with my glee club," he says, and all the children fall cross-legged onto the carpet, eyes wide and bright, attention rapt on Kurt. "Ever since I knew what a magical place it is, I'd been dreaming about going there, and the moment I stepped off the plane into the airport, it really did feel like coming home. And now I live there - if you dream something, and you work hard, anything is possible." Leaning down to play a short introduction on the piano, Kurt smiles sweetly at their audience as he starts to sing  _Daydream Believer_ , glancing back at Blaine with a teasing smile at the corners of his mouth, encouraging him to join in.

Their voices blend so perfectly, and Blaine is almost blushing at their level of musical chemistry - it's practically off the charts. Kurt encourages the children to dance, bending down to their level to help with the more ambitious moves and teaching them the words as he goes. He looks so natural among them, exactly the opposite of what Blaine might have expected - he doesn't peel away from them nervously, or immediately yank their hands away from his clothes or hair. It's easy - too easy - to picture Kurt dancing with his own son or daughter, singing to them in that amazing voice, and the notes are automatic as Blaine sinks into a fantasy - Kurt, barefoot, hair wet from the bath, with an apple-cheeked toddler standing on his feet, twirling around the room with shining eyes and cheeks dimpled by a wide smile; Blaine himself at the piano, running through everything he can, smiling at his family.

When the song ends, reality returns, and Blaine stands up abruptly as the giggling children all try to hug Kurt at once, clamouring for stories from the wedding. "You guys want to see pictures?" he asks, and they all nod, jostling for the best viewing position. Blaine leans in too, pulling out his own phone to add to the album, and they all smile at the pictures of Brittany handing her bouquet straight to Kurt with a smile, of the tangle of arms reaching for Santana's flowers sailing through the air, of Sam and Puck singing, of the wedding party raising their glasses to the camera, of Tina grinning straight into the camera, of Kurt and Walter slow dancing, looking as if the rest of the world doesn't even exist. "And that's who you're getting married to?" one boy asks, and Kurt smiles, pausing over the picture.

"Yeah, that's my future husband," he says softly, and then flicks past to a picture of Blaine performing with Dave and Artie, all three of them grinning out at the crowd. There's Brittany with flowers in her hair, a drunk Rachel collapsed in Elliott's lap, Marley and Unique dancing together, Mercedes and Jane posing, Dani kissing Madison's shoulder - an incredible scrapbook of the most perfect candids from the day to add to all the professionally taken photos and videos.

The class lasts an hour, and the children are all clamouring for longer as Kurt bids each of them goodbye, Blaine standing off to the side with a small smile. He's surprised when Shawna rushes to hug him too, and gazes up at him with wide eyes as she rushes out, "Will you come back next week? You and Kurt sound really pretty when you sing together, and you play piano really good."

"I'll try, Shawna," he promises, and she beams and hugs him again before skipping away. As the last boy leaves towards his parents, Kurt turns to Blaine with a small smile, carefully retying the neckerchief one of the girls has been wearing around her head for the entire class.

"You were great in there," he says, and Blaine just shrugs.

"I've performed at Six Flags every summer since I was fourteen, I do have some experience trying to entertain little kids," he says airily, and then notices the way Kurt's looking at him. Intense and deep, like he's trying to understand Blaine from the inside out.

"It's not just that," Kurt says, his voice softening, lifting on the air like a sultry summer breeze. "You were  _amazing_  in there, Blaine. And the way we sound together is just perfect." Looking Blaine straight in the eyes, making his stomach go liquid, he says, "I really love getting to spend time with just you."

"I know, it seems like this whole summer has been crowded out by all these people," Blaine says, completely aware he's babbling but somehow unable to stop himself. "Not that I don't love spending time with my friends and getting to know yours, I do - Santana is just so wonderful, I'm so glad I got to meet her - but it's nice to be able to  _breathe_ , know what I mean?" Pausing for breath, glancing up at Kurt for an answer, Blaine simply loses his breath when he sees the way Kurt's looking at him.

With the smallest step forward, Kurt's lips are pressed sweetly against his, and Blaine's heart practically leaps out of his chest, drumming painfully against his chest, his arms hanging uselessly at his sides. Kurt lifts one hand to cup his cheek gently, almost tenderly, and kisses him in a way that has none of the urgency and need of the kisses after the wedding. It's sweet and gentle, and could be chaste if not for the immediate arousal that burns to life, whiplashing through Blaine's body as Kurt presses closer, their clothes rustling together.

And then the perfect moment is shattered by Kurt's phone ringing, and Blaine isn't imagining the regret in his eyes when he has to break the kiss, the irritation in the set of his jaw. Touching a finger incredulously to his lips, he resists the temptation for a happy dance and stares at the new splashes of pink on Kurt's cheeks, the shallow rise and fall of his chest, the way his eyes have darkened. "Carole?" Kurt says into the phone, idly twisting the end of his neckerchief around one finger. "What's up? Do you need me to go to the store on my way home?"

The colour drains from Kurt's face almost immediately, his eyes filling with tears, and he holds the phone to Blaine wordlessly, seemingly unable to speak. Staring at such a breakdown happening in front of him, Kurt going from happy and affectionate to ashen and tearful within a matter of seconds. "Carole? It's Blaine, what's going on?"

"Oh, Blaine, sweetie, thank God you're with him," Carole says, and she sounds choked-up in a way that has panic clutching at Blaine's throat, choking him. "Thank God neither of you is alone right now. Sweetie, it's your dad. He was brought onto my ward about forty minutes ago with your mom. He's had a heart attack."

Blaine has to sit down, collapsing onto the kerb and searching for something to say. "Is he...is he..." Words choke him, sour and sharp, and he stares at a line of ants marching along the road, trying to focus everything he has on that instead of imagining anything awful.

"He's going to be okay, I promise," Carole says, soothing and calm, and Blaine can't bear to think of how many people she might speak to in a day, how many people have to hear those words and feel what he does. "It was a mild attack, and your mom got him in very quickly. The doctor thinks it's just all the excitement of the past few weeks. We've got him under sedation and we'll need to keep him at least overnight, but he really will be okay. You can come and see him now."

"Thank you." Ending the call, Blaine pulls his keys out of his pocket and runs for his car. Kurt is leaning against the side of it, shoulders heaving as he sobs, and Blaine's heart breaks at his tear-streaked face and red-rimmed eyes. "Come on, Kurt, let's go and see him," he says, trying to be calm and collected, and Kurt's face crumples all over again. "Carole says he's going to be okay, they just need to keep him in overnight for supervision."

Driving as fast as he legally can towards the hospital, Blaine can only hand Kurt tissues and listen to him sniffle and let out the occasional sob as he tries to calm himself down. "It's my fault," he mumbles, and Blaine shakes his head frantically. "It  _is_ , Blaine! This is horrible, it's all because of us getting engaged and the party and everything in the last few weeks, it was too much! Oh my God, I left without telling him I love him this morning, what if I never get to say it to him again? It's just like my dad, when he had a heart attack we'd just had a fight over something totally stupid! I can't lose him, I can't lose my mom and my brother and my fiancé, I can't!" He bursts into tears again, and Blaine can't do anything but grit his teeth and inch over the speed limit.

Carole and Pam are waiting for them at the hospital, each rushing to hug their son. Blaine clings to his mother, noticing her eyelashes spiky with tears and how fragile she seems, shivering despite the warm day. "I'm so sorry, my little dove," she whispers, stroking his hair. "I went into his room and found him like that, so still, I was so scared I was too late."

"Don't think like that, Pam," Carole says sternly. "He's going to be fine, I promise. Burt had a heart attack a few years ago, and he made an amazing recovery." Pam gives her a weak, wan smile, and dabs at her eyes with a disintegrating tissue, then extends an arm to Kurt for a hug.

"He's been asking for you," she says, and Kurt lets out a sob and flees down the hallway to the patient rooms, leaving Blaine to sink into a chair and just wait.

His phone starts to ring after a few minutes, and he picks it up to Santana starting to talk before he's even greeted her. "Are you still with Kurt? He promised to meet us for lazy brunch forty minutes ago, and it's not like him to be so late. Did a kid puke on him or something?"

"We're at the hospital," Blaine says, a lump in his throat. "My dad had a heart attack. Kurt's with him now."

"Oh my God, Blaine, I'm so sorry," Santana says, sounding absolutely horrified. "That's awful, I'm so sorry. Tell him to get better soon, and I'll maybe come by your place tomorrow with something. What's that, babe?" A muffled voice in the background, and then Santana says, "Britt wanted me to tell you heart attacks are just from loving too much."

Huffing out a wet, squeaky laugh, Blaine says his goodbyes and hangs up. Kurt doesn't come back for over an hour, face ghostly white but for his red eyes, and slumps onto a chair clutching a coffee cup like a lifeline, all trace of the smiling man dancing with children gone completely. "He woke up," he croaks out, lifting his eyes to Blaine's. "I told him how much I love him, and he just smiled and looked my ring and tried to shake his own hand for getting me to say yes." He rushes this last part out and gives a small, slightly hysterical laugh, but he's trembling violently, and Blaine reaches over to take his hands gently.

Seeing his father in a hospital bed, grey against the white sheets and hooked up to monitors and drips, is a harrowing experience, but Blaine gets to say his piece and squeeze his father's hand before he leaves. "Come home with me tonight," he pleads with Kurt, texting with one hand and sipping a third coffee with the other. "Carole's arranged for my mom to stay and keep an eye on my dad, she'll call straight away if anything happens. I'll cook you dinner and you can sleep in my dad's bed. With your dad in Washington and Carole here, I really don't want you to be alone tonight."

"Okay," Kurt says, looking as if he's about to fold in on himself and collapse. Explaining the situation to Pam and Carole, and gently steering Kurt out of the hospital and back into the warm summer day, Blaine drives them both home, coaxing Kurt to leave his phone in the kitchen and sit down on the couch with a hot chocolate and toast and watch reruns of  _Say Yes To The Dress_. Kurt is still shivering, so Blaine retrieves the fake-fur throw from the room that used to be Natalie's and is not just for guests and wraps it around him. "Why are you being so nice to me?" Kurt asks shakily, looking up at Blaine with dull eyes.

"You're marrying my dad, Kurt," Blaine says softly. "We're going to be family. Cooper and Natalie never gave me a chance to be sweet to them, so let me be sweet to you."

"You always have been," Kurt murmurs, and there's another exchange of energy between them, a meeting of their eyes that Blaine feels all the way down to his toes. "Can I have another hot chocolate?" Smiling, Blaine leans over to kiss his cheek and retrieves the empty mug, padding into the kitchen and slotting more bread into the toaster.

Though neither of them feels much like eating, Blaine orders pizza and fries and garlic bread and they watch yet more mindless reality TV to distract them, until the boxes are empty but for crumbs and grease stains. They take turns showering, Blaine playing music from his room so there's no silence to make either of them think too hard, and it seems like the night could be okay until he hears Kurt crying through the wall. It's such a heart-wrenching sound that he can't stay put and listen, and climbs out of bed to go to him.

Despite his hoodie and the blanket wrapped around him, Kurt is shaking, tears silvery on his cheeks in the gloom, and Blaine turns on the lamp on the nightstand as he climbs onto the bed, taking Kurt's hands in his. "It's okay," he whispers softly, a promise. "It's going to be okay. You're not going to lose him."

Pulling his hands out of Blaine's grasp, twisting his engagement ring fretfully around his finger, Kurt whispers, "It's my fault. The doctor said it was too much excitement - that's because of me. Because we got engaged. Because we sort-of moved in together. Because we threw that party to celebrate. Because a shadow from my past showed up and Walter took matters into his own hands. It's-"

"Not your fault, Kurt, it's no one's fault," Blaine says, and moves closer, close enough to count the freckles on Kurt's nose and see the individual tears in his lashes. "It's just nature, and he's going to be fine. You're going to live a long, happy life together and have an amazing marriage and be together for always."

Kurt smiles weakly at him, still teary but at least quieting. "Stay until I fall asleep?" he asks, and Blaine nods gently. "Hold me?" Helpless with those huge, wet eyes focused on him like headlights, Blaine puts an arm over Kurt's waist as they lie down, and his heartbeat jumps when Kurt rolls over to face him and curls into him, face buried in the crook of his neck and body hot through the blanket between them, strong and lithe and so close.

After ten minutes, Kurt is silent but for his breathing, and Blaine thinks he's fallen asleep. But when he tries to untangle himself, Kurt's arms tighten around him, and Blaine's heart skips a beat when soft lips press against his neck, slowly moving upwards. A hand slides out of Kurt's cocoon of blankets, and slides under Blaine's shirt, over his belly and upwards for a fingertip to gently circle a nipple, making his breathing quicken desperately. "Kurt, you're dreaming," he says, trying to shake him off, but Kurt presses closer, kissing beneath Blaine's jaw.

"Come on, Blaine," he breathes, barely audible. He's just a silhouette in the dark, but his eyes are bright, pupils blown with arousal, and his mouth is pink and perfect and tempting. The kiss he presses to Blaine's mouth is too short and too soft, not enough to soothe the craving that's licking his insides like fire. "I want this." He shakes off the blankets, and is half on top of Blaine, looking like he's some timeless statue in the night, and kisses him again, harder this time, tongue teasing at Blaine's bottom lip. "I want  _you_."

"We can't," Blaine murmurs, but any further argument is silenced by Kurt's lips on his, soft and warm and leaving him helpless, drowning in Kurt's scent and the warmth of his skin as he kisses him with greater intent, pushing against him.

"I want you," he repeats breathlessly, fingertips tracing over Blaine's chest beneath his shirt. "You're so gorgeous. It's dark and we're young, let's be reckless." Blaine can only groan into another kiss, dizzy with longing. "And this time I'm not drunk, so you don't have to worry about taking advantage."

That is enough to halt everything, and Blaine pushes Kurt away, sitting up and staring at him. "This time?" he asks, and the look on Kurt's face says it all. "You lied to me. You  _do_  remember kissing me after Brittany and Santana's wedding. You remember it all, don't you?"

"Blaine-"

"Don't!" Blaine snaps, anger twisting in his gut. "You remember kissing me in the car and leaving me so confused and so hurt. You remember coming to my door and throwing yourself at me. You remember that I had to push you away because you're engaged to  _my dad_!"

"Blaine,  _please_ -"

"Do you know how many hours of sleep I've lost, knowing I was the only person in the world who knew what happened?!" Blaine shouts, and Kurt stares at him, eyes wounded, hunched in on himself like a child hiding from the world. "Do you know how many times I wondered if I'd just dreamt it? Do you know how guilty I've felt, thinking about kissing you?"

"I never meant-"

"Save it." Sliding off the end of the bed, Blaine turns to look at Kurt with as much contempt as he can muster. "Don't even think about coming crawling into my bed for warmth and comfort. I can't believe you let me think I'd made it all up in my head." He slams the door behind him with a satisfying crash, and shoves his face into his pillow until all he sees is a kaleidoscope of swirling colours, heart heaving with betrayal and lips still tingling with the sheer joy of Kurt's kisses.

* * *

**From: Santana**

**Oh honey, you seriously are a mess right now.**


	10. But The Summer Is Over

**Johnathan Rourke posted to your wall: Happy birthday, Blaine. Put our check to good use!**

**Santana Lopez posted to your wall: Britt insisted I was a bad friend if I didn't send this as soon as the notification hit, so many happy returns.**

**Wes Montgomery posted to your wall: Happy birthday! Check your messages.**

**Madison McCarthy posted to your wall: Happy birthday from me, Mason, Dani and Jane!**

**Elliott Gilbert posted to your wall: Happy birthday, Blaine. Dave and I will be by later with your present.**

**Rachel Berry posted to your wall: Happy nineteenth birthday! Jesse and I made sugar cookies, I'll come over later to give you them and join in the celebration.**

**Sugar Motta invited you to an event: NEW DIRECTIONS AND FRIENDS END OF SUMMER SUGAR SHACK BLOWOUT!**

**Sugar Motta posted to your wall: Hoping to see you and the entire Anderson family at the party! Tell Cooper to answer my texts :***

**Sugar Motta posted to your wall: And HAPPY BIRTHDAY!**

**From: Artie Abrams**

**Tina kept me up until three perfecting your birthday cake. You better like it.**

Trying to ignore the incessant buzzing of his phone at such an obnoxious time of the morning - in the age of social media, birthdays are the worst when all he wants to do is sleep  for just a little longer - Blaine rolls over in bed and tucks his face into the crook of Sebastian's neck, inhaling the familiar sharp scent of his cologne and letting out a quiet hum of contentment. "I hate birthdays," he mumbles into Sebastian's skin, feeling his boyfriend's fingers skate lightly down his spine, making him shiver. "Doesn't matter if you want to sleep in, people start posting on your wall too early to ignore it."

"Poor baby, getting all this attention on his birthday from all these friends," Sebastian teases gently, and Blaine smacks at him sleepily. "Is being the centre of attention a bad thing?"

"It is at eight thirty in the morning," Blaine says, lifting his head to look into Sebastian's eyes, bright in the early morning sun slipping through the blinds, smiling at him softly.

"What about being the centre of my attention?" Arching an eyebrow and smirking slowly, gaze heated, Sebastian leans in to kiss Blaine, arms wrapping more firmly around him and inching him onto his back. Gazing at him through half-closed eyes, cheeks heating and pulse racing, Blaine arches into the mouth gliding kisses down his chest and shoves his phone into the nightstand drawer as it vibrates again.

Sebastian smirks darkly up at him as he mouths at his hard cock through his underwear, Blaine fisting spirals into the sheets as he watches Sebastian's head move between his shifting thighs, eager for more. Nothing can invade this moment, nothing can make this mean any less, nothing can distract him. He can feel his affection for Sebastian grow, can embrace how he feels with Sebastian hovering over him with dark eyes gleaming, gasp into each heated kiss and writhe beneath those hands. He comes with a cry, and laughs at Sebastian noses at his neck and murmurs, "Happy birthday, babe."

"Get off me, I need to shower," Blaine says and bats gently at his boyfriend, only allowing a few more kisses dotted over his shoulders and neck before he slides out of bed and into the bathroom, feeling powerful and sexy knowing he's being watched.

Cleaned up and still flushed and loose from Sebastian's talented lips and hands, Blaine can't help the thrill when he pulls Sebastian's shirt over his head, carefully arranging the collar to cover the darkest lovebites. Sebastian's arms slide around his waist, a perfectly handsome couple in the mirror, and Blaine can't help the way his breath stutters when Sebastian kisses up his neck and nips gently at his earlobe. "Do you really have to leave, babe?"

"It's my birthday, I have to see my family," Blaine says apologetically, leaning into the warm familiarity of Sebastian's half-naked body, still damp from the shower. "You're coming round later, I'm sure even our fledgling relationship can survive a few hours apart. You'll get to meet my grandparents, and my gran always brings a ridiculous amount of food, it'll be a feast." Carefully turning around in Sebastian's arms, he kisses him and smiles. "Thank you."

"As always, it's my pleasure," Sebastian says and kisses him again, in that way that makes his knees turn to liquid and his entire body curve towards Sebastian like a magnet, craving his touch. "You don't seem like someone about to leave." He laughs, and Blaine just looks up at him with what he thinks Tina would describe as slavish adoration.

"Honeymoon phases are a wonderful thing," he says, and kisses Sebastian one more time before he tears himself away to shove his shoes on and get out the door before he does something stupid like fall straight back into bed with his boyfriend of around eleven days. They haven't even really been on an official date yet - mostly cuddling on a couch in one of their houses, watching TV, exchanging kisses and ultimately ending up in bed.

He's never known anything so physical before. His desire for Dave was never like this, never felt like this - an endless fire, banked just under his skin, desperate to escape and blaze. He never felt like he lost himself in a frenzy of grabbing hands and scratches down his back and sides and eager lips everywhere on him. This is everything he's never had before and now wonders if he'll ever leave behind. From the moment he stormed out of his house after the argument with Kurt, the moment he decided to go to a pair of arms that would welcome him in with no betrayal, no lying, no weird signals and up and down and messing with his head, Sebastian has been the most wonderful boyfriend he could ever have asked for.

Sure, his feelings for Kurt aren't slipping away yet. But it's not even been two weeks yet, and he's still angry and hurt and confused. When all of that can fade into acceptance, when he can let himself acknowledge the fact that Kurt just used him, because he was a pair of lips and he let him in so naively, his feelings will fade with that betrayal and he'll be free of the confusion that's plagued his summer.

"The wandering hero returns!" comes a shout as soon as he approaches the driveway, and Tina jumps down from Artie's car, pulling at the collar of his shirt and looking at him critically. "Hair's good, some of those hickies are a bit obvious. My concealer's in my purse, help me get Artie and I'll give you a quick repair job. Can't face your parents looking like that."

"Blaine's parents have had their fair share of hickies over the last few months," Artie says from the driver's seat as Blaine opens out his wheelchair and sets it firmly on the driveway. "And I'm not just talking about your dad, Blaine. I think your mom's seeing someone secretly."

"Well, she'll tell me when she's ready if she's seeing someone," Blaine says confidently, and he and Tina help Artie into the chair before she sits him down on the porch steps and starts carefully applying concealer to the worst mouth-shaped bruises. "Maybe I'll end up with even more steps, and more complicated family ties to explain to people. I'm just going to start saying everyone is my cousin."

"People are going to think it's pretty weird if you tell them your dad's husband is your cousin," Tina says, and Artie laughs. "Okay, much better," she adds, capping the concealer with a flourish and bopping the end of Blaine's nose with the tube. "Stop getting so many hickies. They're a bitch to hide from your family."

"Tell me about it, with you and your latent vampire tendencies," Artie says, and Blaine grins at the affronted noise Tina lets out and gets them both inside before they can start arguing. His family are already waiting with hugs and a pile of neatly-wrapped presents, all talking over each other to wish him a happy birthday and a lucky year and a wonderful life.

Unwrapping everything with exclamations of joy, carefully setting out his cards in a patchwork and putting the checks and bills from distant family members into an envelope, Blaine tries very hard not to feel the sting that Kurt - at Walter's side, of course, wearing a T-shirt with a print of the New York skyline and a pair of tight jeans - only contributed to his birthday haul by adding his signature to the present from Walter. A few short weeks ago he was being described as one of Kurt's best friends, and now they're barely on speaking terms, Kurt's 'happy birthday' dull and quiet, their gazes unable to meet. Even telling himself repeatedly that it's Kurt's fault - Kurt messed him around, Kurt lied, Kurt kissed him when he shouldn't have, Blaine didn't initiate any of it, he was strung along by someone who is flashing around their engagement ring for all to see - doesn't stop it from hurting that he's lost someone when their friendship came so easily and felt so right.

"People are coming over around three o'clock for lunch in the garden, and of course drinks with adult supervision," Pam says, and Blaine rolls his eyes towards Tina and Artie. "Dave is bringing Paul, and Rachel asked if she could bring her dad, since she doesn't get to see him often but still wants to come. And, of course, Burt and Carole are coming along a little earlier to help set up."

"Sometimes I think we're stealing you away from your parents," Walter teases lightly, and Kurt smiles up at him. Blaine can't help but see the way his whole demeanour changes, lighting up, so in love, and feel his stomach clench painfully at how wooden things have become between him and Kurt, while his connection with Walter seems only to have grown with Blaine's fading.

"It's not stealing if I'd rather be with you," he says, and kisses him in that way that walks the line between appropriate for a public space and something couples should keep for when they're alone. Tina rolls her eyes and drizzles syrup onto a pancake before rolling it up, helping herself cheerfully to some orange juice.

"Are you guys going to that big party Sugar's invited us to?" she asks, and Blaine just shrugs. "I asked her what it's actually about, and apparently they've done it every summer since the class of 2012 graduated, just as a way to say goodbye for a while. We can invite parents if we want, as long as she has all the names so she can complete the seating plan accurately. And if there's anyone we would prefer not to sit with, we have to register that complaint ASAP." She rolls her eyes and adds, "You'd think she was organising a military engagement instead of a party."

"It'll be fun," Artie says bracingly, squeezing her hand. "We really should say goodbye to the new friends we've made, and maybe we can have a little more time with the rest of the gang going back to New York, just so it's not too awkward." Addressing Blaine now, he says, "We double-dated with Dave and Elliott a couple of nights ago - we were going to ask you and Sebastian to make a triple, but we thought you're a bit carried away with the physical aspect of your relationship for now - and Elliott was telling us the New York gang do potluck dinners every Monday night and trade around whose apartment they go to for it."

"So, basically, at some point we're going to have a bunch of people in our apartment and if we're not at least friendly with them it'll be awkward," Tina clarifies sweetly, perching in Artie's lap and squinting against the sunlight to look up at Blaine. Blaine's glad they're alone in the garden, because she barely lowers her voice when she asks, "What's up with you and Kurt? You were friends like two weeks ago, and now he barely looks at you."

"He has issues with me dating Sebastian," Blaine says. Well, it's not entirely untrue. "He thinks Seb is just a cheap playboy who'll use me and dump me. He's just being judgemental - Seb's already talking about when his schedule will let him come and see me when we go back to college." Finishing off his first pancake, he stares down at his plate and murmurs, "I'm scared about being in a long-distance relationship."

"Oh sweetie, you'll be fine," Tina says gently. "Long distance works out easily if both people put the effort in, and I know you like Sebastian. You'll put the effort in, and he will too, and it'll work out between you. Things go up in the first few months, Bling. It's after that phase you find out whether you're really compatible or you just fall apart at the first fight."

Sebastian arrives early, on the heels of Burt and Carole, and Blaine has never been more pleased to see someone, kissing him without worrying about what his family will think and staying close to his side all evening, through all the people bringing him presents and all of those who decide to stay, and Rachel dragging out a karaoke machine and Santana whooping encouragingly when Pam and Carole decide to duet on  _I'm So Excited_. He invites Sebastian to be his date to the New Directions party when they're curled up together in the cool dusk outside, the wind tugging at their clothes and the grass whispering against exposed skin, and Sebastian kisses him and murmurs, "I'd love to."

When the festivities are done, and everyone has gone home at long last, Blaine leaves the bathroom in a haze of steam to Kurt on the landing, about to go to bed. "How are things with that two-bit playboy?" he asks, venom in his voice and fire in his eyes. "Did he break your heart yet? I bet he's fucking someone else right now."

"We're exclusive, meaning he's not kissing anyone else or trying to get anyone except me into bed," Blaine snaps icily. "Maybe you don't know what exclusive means even with a ring on your finger, but he does and he respects me."

"Drop him," Kurt snaps, eyes flashing and arms folded across his chest. Even in the midst of his anger, Blaine can't help but notice his biceps, even as he wishes he didn't. "This is getting old and tired already. Your dad is fragile, and the thought of you out on the town with someone like him is making him seriously worried."

"If you tell him what really happened between us and explain why you put me through what you did, I'll break up with Sebastian." Only silence greets this statement, and Blaine says, "Didn't think so."

Things between him and Kurt don't get any better in the next few weeks, the last of the summer. They don't talk despite being together so often with Kurt taking advantage of every single second he can possibly spend with Walter. Blaine spends more and more time with Sebastian, or with Tina and Artie and Dave, and often Elliott, getting coffee or wandering the streets or just sitting in a back garden enjoying each other's company. He gets to know Mason and Jane, and Jesse and Rachel, trying to familiarise himself with the people he'll be around when they go back to New York.

The party night is as crazy as he would've expected from the group of people in question, with the addition of a few stray Warblers and some parents, all clearly with the same goal to say goodbye in style in mind. Accepting the hand Sebastian offers to get out of Elliott's car, Blaine glances over at another car and does a double-take seeing Virginia - joining in with the merriment before she moves to London - take hands with Myron and smile into his eyes. "When did that happen?" he asks as he catches up to Madison - the most likely to know what's going on with people at any given time.

"Engagement party," she answers immediately. "Myron's so infatuated he's decided to set plans for next year in stone instead of drifting around here and go to London with her. Never a dull moment with friends like him."

"I'm loving not getting so many random texts from Sugar now she's chasing Cooper," Dani says as they watch the girl in question dart across the parking lot with a bright smile. "I really hope she wears him down, three weeks with her and he'll be taken down a peg."

Sitting with Tina, Artie, Dave and Elliott, Blaine can't help but be glad that Kurt must've asked Sugar to be seated away from him. His table is on the other side of the room, even if Brittany keeps waving at Blaine and trying to beckon him over, so Blaine can ignore the looks Kurt is giving him as he moves closer to Sebastian and listens to Sugar's squealing introduction for the night. "This is the third annual Sugar Shack Blowout, and I hope there's going to be many more! For all of you who are here with us for the first time, we're about to eat and drink and sing and dance and cry and have a ton of fun, so I hope you all bought a designated driver! Let's get this party started!"

Laughing at each other, dizzyingly in love, Dani and Madison are singing  _Talking Body_  and Blaine is laughing as he dances with Sebastian, feeling his heart swelling with joy in this moment, with familiar arms around him and eyes looking into his with such fondness and that smiling mouth inches above his. Breath catching in his throat, he brushes a kiss against Sebastian's lips and can feel the smile when Sebastian holds him closer and kisses him harder, only pulling away when Sam wolf-whistles from nearby and gives Blaine a thumbs-up through the crowd.

The night seems to stretch on as the lights flash and so many people go up to sing, Sebastian there for every song, watching from the sidelines with a smile when Blaine gets swept aside by Brittany, snatched up for a duet by Rachel, laughs his way through something silly with Mason and Madison. When the twins are singing  _All Out Of Love_ , both teary-eyed, much later in the evening, Blaine sways in Sebastian's arms on the dance floor, the whole world feeling like it's just the two of them. Sebastian leans in, kisses his neck and whispers, "I'm really going to miss you, Blaine."

Blinking back the hot prickle of tears - it's late, he's emotionally drained from the long evening - Blaine murmurs back, "I'm going to miss you too. A lot," and leans in for the kiss, slow and bittersweet, tainted by the separation coming in the morning. When they separate, he sees Kurt looking at them from his table, where he's waiting for another drink, and wonders if it's just the lights making his eyes look so sad.

He says his lingering goodbye to Sebastian that night, in slow kisses and drifting caresses and hips pressed together, and leaves in the grey dawn of the morning for the airport, half-asleep in the back of Artie's mother's car, tucked deep into his NYU hoodie and waiting in the departure lounge for others to finish their goodbyes. Sitting on her suitcase and flipping through her phone, Santana glances up at Mason and Madison openly sobbing and attracting some worried looks from innocent bystanders and says, "They do this every time. And they have to race across the airport to hug like some romantic comedy whenever they're reunited. They are the most twin-like twins I have ever met."

"Everyone cries when we have to say goodbyes," Jesse points out, and it's true. Elliott's cheeks are definitely streaked silvery with tears and he doesn't seem to want to let go of Dave. Tina is hugging everyone and crying while Artie waits for her - their flight isn't the only one taking off soon, and it seems everyone has goodbyes to say.

"Give that boy an Oscar," Santana murmurs as Kurt sobs loudly again, kissing Walter and clinging to him.

"Don't be mean, he's really worried about leaving him after he only just had a heart attack," Brittany says sternly. "But Walter insisted he went back, and I agree. He'll never get back on the horse if he waits even an extra day. Summer has to be over at some point."

After ten more minutes, Santana gets sick of waiting and goes to drag the stragglers towards the gate, resolutely ignoring the waving and the shouts of, "I'll call you when we land!" Through a streak of amazing luck, Blaine is sitting next to Santana for the flight, with Jane across the aisle and quietly comforting Mason, and Kurt is two rows back with Elliott. The nightmarish idea of having to sit next to Kurt for the journey has been haunting him for days.

But, partway through the flight, when it's quiet and a lot of people are napping or working with headphones firmly in, Santana turns to him and quietly says, "We need to talk. Kurt's been telling me things - things that have been happening between you and him. I want to say this as politely as I can: please don't do anything that could jeopardise Kurt's relationship with Walter." She raises a hand when Blaine opens his mouth in a fury and says, "I don't care what you think about who's been initiating things, you have the power to stop it. I can't stand idly by and watch Kurt hurting himself like this, so I'm putting my foot down. No more between you two."

Irritation pressing on his chest, Blaine snaps, "Trust me, it's not going to be a problem anymore," and feels dark gratification at the way Santana looks shocked at the venom in his voice. "He lied to me and screwed with me, and I can't just take that lying down." That seems to be enough, and Santana leaves him alone for the rest of the flight.

When the taxi pulls up outside the apartment block, a sense of incredible calm settles over Blaine. Even the effort of heaving their luggage up the stairs doesn't seem so bad when he collapses on his bed and looks up at the familiar ceiling, happy to be home. His phone vibrates when it's landed on the bedspread, and he tugs it down to smile at the message.

**From: Sebastian**

**I miss you already. As soon as I have a concrete schedule I'll let you know and come out and visit. Start negotiating with your roommates for an empty house now ;)**

It's sweet, and it makes Blaine laugh, and he opens it to text back. But he can't help but notice that it's been almost a month since he so much as exchanged a text with Kurt - and to think about how many times he's sat and watched the cursor blink for minutes at a time, wondering what to say to heal the void between them. Wondering how best to articulate what is complicated and tangled.

Wondering how to say 'I still compared my boyfriend's kisses to yours and you come out on top every time.' Wondering how to say 'I'm scared the feelings I have for you aren't going to go away even when I stop being angry.'

Wondering how to say 'I think I could be falling in love with you.'

And wondering if he can safely say 'And I'm terrified.'


	11. The Taste Of My Love

_The first thing Kurt thinks when he cracks his eyes reluctantly open is that, judging by the taste in his mouth and the way the whole room is spinning and the red-hot nail being relentlessly drilled into his head, he must've had an amazing twenty-first birthday. Nestling further into his cocoon of blankets, he lets out a guttural groan and presses his face further into the pillow when the door opens and Carole cheerfully says, "Good morning, you three. Can you stomach breakfast or should I just start the coffee?"_

" _Coffee would be perfection," comes Rachel's faint voice from somewhere on the floor, and Kurt can hear Carole laughing beyond the closed door, hear her footsteps descending the stairs, and slowly sits up, feeling like any sudden movement would be a grave mistake in his current fragile state._

_The air mattresses have deflated during the night, so both women have only a layer of useless plastic between them and the carpet. Kurt is still wearing his boots from last night, which probably accounts for his aching feet, and merely touching his hair tells him it's definitely a case of awful bedhead still crackling with hairspray. Rachel and Santana aren't in any better shape - Santana's spike-heeled shoes are sticking out from beneath her blanket, Rachel's pillow is streaked with make-up and both of them look as pale and sickly as Kurt feels._

" _My boobs smell like tequila," Santana whines as she eases herself into a sitting position and unsnaps her bra, pulling it out of the top of her dress. "Why didn't we have the sense to change before we collapsed?"_

" _Because we drank so much I'm fairly sure I thought a bush outside Scandals was a person," Rachel groans, attempting to run a hand through her hopelessly tangled hair. "I feel awful. I'm not sure how much of last night I remember and how much was weird rum-induced dreams."_

_Sliding slowly out of bed and onto the floor, still clutching a blanket around his shoulders like a cape, Kurt unbuckles Santana's shoes for her and tosses them into the corner of the room, giving the same treatment to his boots and rubbing his feet. "I remember you hitting on someone," Santana says to him, with a faint smirk. "I think he gave us a ride." Groping for her bag, she triumphantly produces a twenty dollar bill and says, "See, he gave me this to go get my car today."_

" _So much for you promising to be the designated driver," Rachel says, trying to pull a comb through her hair and glaring when it sticks on a tangle. "That guy was really old, like old enough to be our dad. You're not gonna call him, right, Kurt?"_

_With a small shrug, Kurt says, "I have to, at least to say thank you for bringing us home last night. I remember very little, but I doubt we were fun to drive aimlessly around Lima until one of us was coherent enough to give him my address." Privately, he thinks about what he remembers - bright eyes, sweet smile, strong hands - and wonders if it would be such a bad thing to go on a date. After all, he hasn't been on a proper date in more than a year._

_They take turns in the shower, in the steam and the soap that helps them feel a little more human, and go downstairs to vast, steaming mugs of black coffee and Carole's gentle sympathy, though Kurt notices her bite back laughter when Rachel closes the blinds against the weak winter sunlight with a cat-like hiss. Rachel and Santana eventually leave around lunchtime, shouldering their overnight bags and promising they'll meet at Breadstix for old time's sake before they fly back to New York._

_After packing away the inflatable mattresses until the next time someone is staying over, Kurt is sprawled across his bed with a book open beneath his chin as he stares at his phone and the new contact from last night. As the memories trickle back without the early morning haze of initial agony from the hangover, he finds himself blushing at the way he acted. Surely he has to call, if only to say thank you and apologise for being so obnoxiously flirtatious. Remembering noisily singing on the way home with his friends, he thinks about all the lyrics he directed towards Walter and feels his cheeks get even hotter._

_But he has to the one in control. He has to make this move, not sit and wait around. He has to know what kind of man Walter is, if he can be trusted, or if he's just going to take him out once, try to seduce him, throw a tantrum when Kurt inevitably freezes up and can't do it, walk out huffily and forget they ever had anything. His thumb lands on the call button before he can second-guess himself, and it's barely rung when he hears the somehow comforting voice. "Walter Anderson speaking."_

" _Hi Walter, it's Kurt. From Scandals."_

" _Ah, hello. I've been hoping you'd call." Twining a tassel from one of the scarves looped around his headboard between his fingers, Kurt blushes and can't help smiling at the words. "How are you feeling today?"_

" _Terrible this morning, better after a coffee and a shower," Kurt answers softly, and hears the quiet noise of a laugh. Merely the sound of Walter's voice is relaxing, comforting, but it's making his heart race and the colour seep into his cheeks. "You made quite the impression last night," he says before his nerve fails him and the words slink back into his imagination._

_Laughing, Walter says, "I would say the same to you. I've never had Elephant Love Medley sung to me with such drunken passion." Kurt blushes again, letting his head thunk forward onto the open book, and Walter adds, "You were just so sweet, Kurt. Did the adventures continue inside the house?"_

" _I think my parents are just too polite to say we were seriously noisy coming in," Kurt says, abandoning the pretence of reading and sweeping the book onto the floor to lie down properly. "Did I really sing Moulin Rouge to someone I'd just met? I'm so sorry, I'm out of control when I've had too much to drink, I hope I didn't make you uncomfortable."_

" _The opposite, Kurt, I thought it was adorable," Walter says, and Kurt's heart skips a beat. "On that note, I'd love to see you again. If you think that this age difference is too dramatic and you don't want to see me again, that's fine. But, if you do, Breadstix on Wednesday?" Kurt grins into the phone when Walter adds, "I've been partaking of their fine cuisine since the grand opening."_

" _I'm working at the Lima Bean until eight," Kurt says regretfully. Of course this opportunity is going to just slip through his fingers._

" _No problem, I'm in meetings all day on Wednesday so I could use the extra time to relax and get myself into the right mindset for a date," Walter says, and Kurt can feel his spirits lift. "I could book a table for half past eight and pick you up after work?"_

" _Sounds perfect," Kurt says, a little breathier than he intended, and hangs up with a dreamy smile on his face, lying back on his bed and staring up at the pictures. A younger version of himself smiles back, and he murmurs, "Just wait, kid. You're going to meet someone amazing."_

* * *

It's amazing how quickly Blaine slips back into his New York way of life. Waking up early, taking a shower, gelling, making breakfast for the three of them, packing his bag and double-checking he's finished all his assignments, kicking Artie and Tina out of bed if they aren't awake yet and inevitably only just making it onto the correct train. His life becomes a rhythm of classes and homework and subway rides, and the city swallows him up again.

This routine is now broken by the potluck dinners once a week. Elliott is the first to host, and Blaine can't help the apprehension as Tina chatters on and on during the subway ride. He's only known this group of people a few months, and things might still be stilted and awkward. Especially with Kurt - they're still not yet on speaking terms, and with their lives now revolving around school once more, it's become so much easier to avoid him entirely.

Luckily, it's Santana and Brittany who are arriving at the same time as them - five minutes late, which is seriously irritating for Blaine and one of Tina's worst habits - and wave frantically. "We took our own cab," Santana says, and winks while Brittany giggles and laces their fingers together in an easily intimate gesture. "Come on up then, newbies. Rachel's excited for everyone to try her new vegan bolognese recipe."

"She set off the smoke detector twice making it," Brittany says, rolling her eyes, and Artie laughs as they all walk into the building together, making inane small talk while they wait for the elevator.

Elliott's apartment looks like something straight out of a photograph on Pinterest, and he's grinning as they set their food offerings down on a counter and go straight to exploring. "Judge me all you want," he says. "My mother was very overenthusiastic when it came to furnishing my place in the big city. Doesn't stop me from having to borrow chairs from neighbours whenever people come over."

"Pretty sure this entire building knows you as 'chair guy'," Dani says from her perch in the armchair, legs slung over one arm, texting Madison with one hand and drinking wine with the other. "Oh my God, you guys brought cupcakes, I  _love_  you!"

Elliott cooks with all the multi-tasking genius of a professional chef, and soon they're sitting down to dinner all together. Blaine has never felt more sidelined than when the four couples slide immediately together, leaving those currently in long-distance relationships to fill in the gaps. Because some deity in charge of seating arrangements hates him, he ends up with Kurt on one side and Rachel on the other. The table is too small for so many people, so elbows are brushing and Blaine is almost squashed against Kurt's side, hyper-aware of everywhere their bodies are touching.

"To ask the obvious question," Elliott says, ducking to let Dani pass the salad bowl to Mason, "how was everyone's first week of school? For those of us still imprisoned." He grins to himself, and Rachel rolls her eyes dramatically.

"You know, I thought I'd struggle to get back into the swing of things after a whole summer off, but it was surprisingly easy," Jane says. "And I, of course, already have a ton of homework, but I'll make my way through it slowly. With the help of foot rubs and ice-cold drinks from my loving boyfriend, of course." She laughs as Mason rolls his eyes, then grins and kisses her cheek. It makes Blaine ache, seeing the intimacy and wishing he had that.

"I'm starting a long-distance relationships support group," Dani says sourly, giving Mason and Jane a sideway glare. "We can meet up once a week, eat pizza and call our significant others without being judged by our friends who are lucky enough to be in the same state as their loves." Elliott nods enthusiastically and Dani smiles at him across the table.

After they've finished dinner, sitting around the living room, Santana brandishes two six-packs of beer and says, "Time for drinking games - Blaine, you can just have a can of Coke. I respect your decision not to drink. How does Never Have I Ever sound?" Brittany whoops enthusiastically, and gets up to find shot glasses in Elliott's cupboards, putting one in front of each guest. "Okay, the rules are that we each fill our shot glass with beer, and whenever you've done something you have to take the shot. First person to finish their beer is the loser and has to do a dare." Filling her glass with a flourish, she says, "Never have I ever been to the UK," and watches Mason, Elliott, Blaine and Rachel all drink.

Brittany contributes, "Never have I ever been in love with a blonde," and has Santana, Elliott and Jesse all drinking.

Rachel says, "Never have I ever been in love with a woman," and watches Artie, Dani, Santana, Brittany and Jesse drink.

Grinning, Kurt says, "Never have I ever slept with a woman," and raises his glass as Mason, Elliott, Brittany, Santana, Jesse and Artie all drink.

Jesse shoots back, "Never have I ever slept with a man," and watches Blaine, Kurt, Elliott, Mason, Jane, Tina, Rachel, Brittany and Santana all drink.

As everyone looks at him pointedly, Blaine raises his glass and bitterly says, "Never have I ever been in love," heart twisting as everyone but him drinks immediately.

Eyes sad, Rachel reaches over and squeezes his knee and promises, "It'll happen. You're too good of a person to not have it happen to you."

Tina tests the waters with, "Never have I ever had sex in public," and laughs as Santana and Brittany links hands and drink together, followed by a blushing Rachel and a grinning Elliott. "Well, those are stories I have to hear."

"Later," Jane promises, and Tina grins happily. "Never have I ever had sex in a car." Going an even deeper shade of red, Rachel drinks, followed by Jesse, Brittany, Santana, Kurt and Dani. "Elliott, really? Never?"

"From what I've heard, I believe car sex is strongly overrated," Elliott says, ignoring the look on Santana's face. "Never have I ever kissed more than one person in this room." He winks at Kurt, laughing when Kurt immediately has to take his shot, followed shortly by everyone but Blaine, Tina and Artie. "Never joining in with spin the bottle has its benefits."

"You're just a spoilsport," Dani says with a giggle. "Um...never have I ever hooked up with someone at a wedding, bachelor or bachelorette party or engagement party. Hooked up is defined as sleeping with someone who you weren't in a relationship with at the time."

"You don't play fair!" Mason whines as he drinks, followed by Kurt, Rachel, Santana and Elliott. Blaine feels Kurt's eyes on him, heavy, as he takes his shot. "Never have I ever been heartbroken."

"Lucky," Santana says shortly before taking her shot. Blaine follows her, waving the questions off with a shake of his head, then Kurt, Rachel, Jesse, Brittany and Dani drink too.

"Never have I ever sung lead on any song at a show choir competition," Artie says, pulling the discussion away from such dangerous territories. Blaine drinks, then Rachel, Santana, Jesse, Mason and Brittany.

"Never have I ever gotten into NYADA," Elliott offers lightly, and Rachel, Mason and Kurt all drink. As he goes to refill his glass, Kurt stares down at his can and tosses it away, and Santana crows triumphantly, draining the rest of her beer in victory.

"Okay, Kurt, your dare!" she says happily, and he rolls his eyes as everyone stares at him eagerly. "It's got to be a really good one since this is the first time you've ever lost a game of this. Any ideas?"

"I know, I know!" Brittany squeals, clutching at her wife's hand, and points at Kurt accusingly. "I dare you to kiss the person in this room you find the most attractive."

"No." Kurt's reply is short, sharp, angry, and Brittany stares at him with round, shocked eyes. "I'm not doing it. I'm engaged, I'm getting married, and I'm not going to kiss anyone but Walter."

"It's just a bit of fun, Kurt!" Santana protests, and grabs Mason's shoulder without warning to give him a short kiss. "See, I'm married, and it's still fine for me to kiss my friends when we're all just having a bit of fun together."

"I'm not doing it," Kurt snaps. "I don't care about your stupid game." Standing up, almost sending Rachel flying where she was leaning on his shoulder, he storms away and the sound of the front door slamming echoes in the shocked silence.

"Well, something's wrong with him," Dani says lightly, trying to diffuse the tension. "Although, if we're going into questions and discussions and stories for the night, if you could marry anyone in this room other than your own significant other, who would it be?"

"Kurt," Santana, Rachel and Brittany all reply at the same time, and all grin around at each other. "You know Kurt and I are destined to be together though, ladies, so you don't stand a chance," Santana adds, cracking her knuckles and grinning at the affronted looks Rachel and Brittany shoot her.

"I think I'd marry Jane," Dani says thoughtfully, and gets a pleased look for her troubles. Jane gets jokingly booed when she says she'd marry Mason anyway, and an adoring look from the man himself, who immediately chooses Blaine, to his delighted surprise.

"I think Tina seems like a wonderful girl," Elliott says, and winks at a grinning Tina. She chooses Blaine, obviously, and Artie surprises everyone by choosing Rachel. Jesse picks Santana and she blows him a teasing kiss, shimmying her shoulders in his direction.

"I think Kurt would pick me," Rachel says, draining her beer and making a face, reaching for her own bottle of wine. "We're so alike, we'd be so good as a married couple."

"You'd be too alike though," Santana argues, and Blaine grins into his drink at the fact that a married lesbian is actually arguing her case for marrying her gay best friend. "Kurt needs someone like me, someone who isn't totally similar but can still understand him on a deeper level. I'd put a little fire in his ice caps."

"That is the dirtiest thing about weather I've ever heard," Mason remarks, and Santana grins and clinks her glass against hers. "So do we get to hear the public sex stories now?"

"I know Rachel's!" Brittany crows triumphantly, and Rachel buries her face in her hands with a groan. "It's my favourite story! So, when she first moved here, Rachel was dating this senior at NYADA who turned out to be a prostitute," Rachel lets out a nameless sound of distress, and Tina chokes on her sip of beer, "and he was really hot aside from the part where he lied to her for months, and he was the NYADA dance professor's TA and he quite often taught classes without his shirt on, and one time he had Rachel up to demonstrate a tango with him and they ended up getting overheard having sex in a closet." Over the outburst of laughter, she adds, "And Rachel had a bruise on her butt from a broom handle for a week!" and prompts more laughter.

"Mine is a generally boring in the bathroom of a club one," Elliott says with a shrug, and then adds, "Santana and Brittany once had sex in the showers of their high school locker room."

"I heard that one after I transferred!" Jane exclaims gleefully. "You two were the cheerleaders who got caught by Coach Sylvester and only just escaped getting kicked off the team?" Santana nods proudly, preening a little, and they all laugh.

"Who did you hook up with at some sort of occasion related to a wedding, Mason?" Tina asks, refilling her glass with lemonade and haphazardly splashing in vodka.

"When our high school teachers got married, while Santana was hooking up with Quinn I was with Kurt," Mason says easily, and this time Artie chokes on his drink, prompting Rachel to pound him on the back with surprising strength. "Jane and I weren't together yet, and I'd been dancing with him most of the night because he was so fragile and eventually we went upstairs together."

"And on the note of talking about him, I better go and talk to him," Santana says, standing up and brushing herself down. "Don't get too carried away telling stories without me. I want to contribute."

Against his better judgement, Blaine volunteers to go and buy more soda as Dani drains the last of it and finds himself drawn to where he can hear familiar voices drifting up from the end of the corridor. "Britt didn't mean it like that," Santana says, and Blaine inches closer, desperate to hear why Kurt reacted so violently. "She doesn't know. I've kept my promise, I haven't told anyone."

"I know she didn't mean it," Kurt says softly, and his voice sounds thick, as if he's been crying. "It just...hit a little too close to home at the moment."

"Have you talked to him?" Silence greets Santana's question, and she sounds like a mother about to start scolding as she says, " _Kurt_..."

"I know," he says sharply. "It's just difficult. It's a precarious situation, you  _know_  that, I can't afford to lose anyone. I don't want to." A sniff that wrenches in Blaine's heart, and he says, "I'm just so muddled, San. I don't know what to do."

"You'll figure it out," Santana says soothingly. "You always do." A pause, a breath, and she adds, "We got to talking in there, and if you had to choose someone to marry from me, Rachel and Brittany, you'd pick me, right?"

"Obviously," Kurt says, and Santana laughs. Smiling briefly, Blaine turns away from the voices and heads down the stairs, hoping the night air will help to clear his head a little. Of course Kurt wouldn't have kissed him - that's just something silly, a daydream to help him feel a little less lonely knowing that he's the only one in a group of twelve who has never been in love. If he wasn't so wonderfully faithful and loving, Kurt would probably kiss Elliott, or Mason, or even Santana. The times Kurt kissed him were just stupid experiments, calculated to reassure Kurt that Walter is the only one for him and to break Blaine's heart for good measure. To make him remember that crushes are stupid and only lead to getting hurt.

His heart starts to pound again at the thought of Kurt's kisses, and he tries to shake it off. Casting his mind back, he thinks about his first kiss with Dave, and tries to make that the only thing he's thinking of as he walks to the nearest store. But it doesn't work - of course it doesn't, not when he has the image of Kurt's tear-filled eyes meeting his in a dimly-lit car. He remembers everything - the hair that fell out of place, curling over Kurt's pale forehead. The scent of alcohol on his breath and his cologne, faded after so many hours but still familiar. His lips, so soft and smooth, pressed so exquisitely against Blaine's. He can remember the way Kurt moaned into his mouth, the way Kurt's hips moved against his, and the thought is accompanied by equal parts guilt and dizzying excitement - excitement that absolutely did not follow his first kiss with Dave.

* * *

_As Walter turns onto his street and the car smoothly decelerates, Kurt is overcome by a sudden wave of sadness. The evening has been so perfect - even following his frantic texts fired off to every fashion-conscious person he knows looking for advice on what to wear, changing sixteen times before he could settle on anything, getting strange looks when he walked into work looking like he was dressed for something far more exciting - that he can't stand the thought that it has to end. Walter is better than he ever could have imagined - sweet, earnest, honest, considerate and_ _ **so**_   _handsome. Just the thought of the way his eyes have focused so completely on Kurt all evening makes him feel warm, feel like this was the best idea he's had in ages._

" _Here you are," Walter says, breaking Kurt out of his thoughts, and he tries to hide his disappointed sigh as he looks up to his house, the lights in the kitchen still blazing. "Let me walk you up." Before Kurt can open his mouth to protest, Walter is opening his door and offering a hand, gentlemanly and smiling gently, and Kurt laces their fingers together. It feels good - right - and he dares to lean into Walter slightly, hoping an arm will slide around his waist. A brush of tentative fingers against his hip is as far as it gets, and the disappointment is leaden in his stomach as they reach the door._

" _I had a really good time," he says, keeping Walter's hands in his, making sure he stays a little longer. "I'd love to see you again. Is...would you like to see me again?" The question is on the tip of his tongue, the important one that would make this more than just two people eating dinner together, but that is perhaps inappropriate for a first date. "Would you want us to be boyfriends?" And then he blushes, because he sounds about fourteen, for God's sake, this isn't high school._

" _Nothing would make me happier," Walter says, and gently cups Kurt's flushed cheek, smiling at him so sweetly in the glow of the porch light. "You really are a miracle, Kurt Hummel. I've never enjoyed a date as much as I enjoyed tonight." Kurt can only nod, blushing even deeper and ducking his head to hide an incredulous, thrilled smile, and Walter kisses his cheek and squeezes his hand before moving away. "Goodnight."_

 _But as soon as Kurt sets a hand on the door and turns to watch Walter disappear into the night, a tiny voice within him whispers_ _ **Give him more than that. He needs more than that. He'll leave if you don't.**_   _Tears spring to his eyes, nervous and angry with himself, angry that he's too fucked up for this to have been a perfect night, and he turns into the door. "Kurt?" Walter is there now, at the bottom of the steps up to the door, holding out his hands like he's surrendering. "I haven't been on a first date in almost twenty years - may I kiss you?" Looking down, Kurt sees the nervousness in his eyes, the way he's standing - the_ _ **Do you want to kiss me at all?**_   _unspoken but obvious - and he can feel that self-loathing slip a little. This is different - Walter is_ _ **different**_ _._

_Descending the three short steps, he kisses Walter with as much forcefulness as he can, trying to send the message that he's willing to do this, he wants to, this kiss is the start of something incredibly hot. But Walter stops him, looking at him, and says, "Slow down. You're the first man I've ever wanted to worship quite so much. Let's not have it be over in a night." As Kurt blinks up at him, he adds, "Call me old-fashioned, but I don't want you to give me everything so soon." That has tears springing to Kurt's eyes, grateful and joyful, and he lets them slip closed to hide it as Walter leans in again._

_The kiss is infinitely gentle, no more contact than their lips and Walter's fingers curved over Kurt's cheek, and Kurt feels like he's floating on it, on the tenderness and the delicacy and the way Walter is holding him so sweetly. It almost makes him want to cry, and his pulse is speeding up when they break apart, Walter smiling at him. "You choose where we go next," he says, and Kurt can only nod, too overwhelmed to speak. "Call me when you decide." He kisses Kurt's forehead, making him suck in a sharp gasp - he's always thought that was such a romantic gesture, so sweet and knowing and gentle - and smiles before he walks away, and the car soon disappears into the night._

_Walking dazedly into the house, Kurt finds his father reading in the kitchen and says, "I told you not to wait up."_

" _Carole got asked to stay on later at work, I wanted to wait for her to come back," Burt explains casually, and closes his book over. "I've had a great time cooking my own chicken salad and watching TV without my son or my wife complaining. And what about you, kiddo? Good night?" Glancing at Kurt, he adds, "You look like you might be about to fly from sheer happiness."_

" _It was perfect," Kurt says dreamily, not noticing his father swallowing a laugh. "He's amazing."_

" _Do you feel like a prince?" Burt asks, face all concern, and Kurt smiles at the memory of being told a good man should always have him feeling royal at the end of a date, his father holding out pamphlets and worrying about him. Of course, at the time, the worry was founded, no matter how much Kurt tried to deny it._

" _Like a king," he says, and drifts upstairs to bury himself in blankets and relive that kiss over and over and over again._

* * *

**I've decided to create a new format with chapters, wherein I will include one or more flashbacks to key moments of Kurt and Walter's relationship around the story moving forward. These will be differentiated from the main plot by italics and line breaks. I hope seeing more of Kurt's side of things will help to answer some of the questions you lovely people have been commenting :) Thank you so much for all your feedback - it really does encourage me to keep pushing through temporary blocks and your comments make my day :)**


	12. You Dry My Tears

_**From: Santana** _

_**Britt and I are flying in next weekend to meet up with our moms and scope out some venues for the wedding. Want to get coffee?** _

_**To: Santana** _

_**I have a standing date night on Saturday, so would Sunday lunch work for you guys?** _

_**From: Santana** _

_**Make it brunch on Sunday, we'll bring our moms and we can get down to the planning with your expertise.** _

_**From: Santana** _

_**How are things with the golden oldie?** _

_**To: Santana** _

_**Don't call him that. We're celebrating a month together on Saturday, so I might end up asking for outfit advice.** _

_**From: Santana** _

_**A month? Already? And you still find him attractive? How far have you gone?** _

_**To: Santana** _

_**Not that it's any of your business. but nowhere.** _

_**From: Santana** _

_**Oh my God, Kurt, you definitely need my advice.** _

_**To: Santana** _

_**It's not like that, Tana. I haven't felt this way about someone...ever. I don't have to sleep with him to show that.** _

_**From: Santana** _

_**Do I detect bitterness? Is he holding back?** _

_**To: Santana** _

_**Little bit.** _

_**From: Santana** _

_**You want my advice?** _

_**From: Santana** _

_**Just talk to him.** _

_**From: Santana** _

_**You've been lonely for such a long time, Kurt. All we want is to see you happy.** _

* * *

The lights of Mason and Jane's living room are harsh after sitting in the dark for hours watching as many movie musicals as could be crammed into one evening, and everyone lets out noises of shock, covering their eyes and trying to adjust to the sudden late. "Okay, kids, Uncle Elliott's got to get home," Elliott says, leaning over to kiss Santana's cheek in goodbye. "Early meeting with a music producer tomorrow, gotta be at my best."

"Break a leg," Rachel calls as Elliott drifts out of the door, curling up closer to Jesse. Addressing the room at large, she asks, "Want to pop in another movie? We haven't gotten to Les Mis yet!"

"Forget it, Berry, I don't need to see you and Kurt crying your eyes out at every death scene," Santana says, sitting up straight and rummaging around in her bag. "I called the cab to come in ten minutes anyway, you and I need our beauty sleep before the graveyard shift tomorrow night."

People struggle to their feet, gathering up glasses to go into the kitchen and finding coats and bags, and Jane kisses Mason softly before she gets up in her socked feet, waving a hand for attention. "I was thinking Callbacks next week," she says, and faces light up around the room. "Book a couple of tables and go enjoy the cocktails and karaoke."

"Um, what's Callbacks?" Tina asks, running a hand through her hair and fishing through her purse for her apartment key.

"It's where all the NYADA students hang out," Brittany answers brightly. "With their guests. They have amazing cocktails and karaoke and a piano, and it's just a really great evening with your friends. We try to go once a month, Kurt and Rachel and Mason get to scope out the competition and the rest of us get to show off."

"Show the world that NYADA should've accepted us," Jesse adds, rolling his eyes, and Blaine grins at him in agreement. "How's Friday for everyone?" There are affirmative calls all around the room, prolonged goodbyes, and they all drift downstairs, towards cabs or the subway station. Swaying around as they meander back to their apartment, Blaine starts to mentally run through his favourite showtunes, thinking about how to really impress everyone at Callbacks, and prove that he doesn't need NYADA to be talented.

The rhythm of school life has become familiar even in the month they've been back in New York. Him and Tina spend their days together, adding fuel to the rumours that they're secretly dating. The gossip chain of NYU is as active as ever - though, from what Mason's told them, nowhere near as exaggerated as NYADA's - and both of them just laugh at the rumours, brushing them off. After all, every night Tina goes home to cuddle up with Artie, and Blaine is getting more and more used to the pressures of a long distance relationship.

It's a cliché from start to finish - falling asleep on Skype together, phone calls that attempt to transcend time zones until one of them starts to yawn too dramatically to ignore it any longer, wistful talk about all the things they'll do when they're finally together again. Blaine would never have expected to be in a long distance relationship, never mind to have feelings for someone else while trying to keep it together across the country.

Yes, his feelings for Kurt are still strong, swelling up within him, just crying out to be spoken aloud. He wishes with every fibre of his being that he had the power to sit with Kurt, look into his eyes and let it all pour out like water - but he can;'t. Formally, they haven't reconciled from that awful fight - at potluck dinners, there are awkward silences between them, meetings of their eyes that just don't last long enough to communicate in any way. When they're all playing drinking games together, or just sprawled out across someone's living room talking, Kurt doesn't ask questions of Blaine, and Blaine offers him the same courtesy. It's horrible, Blaine hates not being able to speak to Kurt after they became such close, fast friends during the summer - but he wants Kurt to apologise.

It feels like he has no one to confide in about what's been going on. Kurt has clearly confided in Santana, even if it does seem like he twisted the story a little so that he seemed the victim, Blaine the vile seducer intent on pulling Kurt away from his relationship and Kurt just sweet and innocent, falling prey to Blaine's expertise. If only that were true - if Blaine had that attitude, he wouldn't have this leaden weight of guilt in his stomach, weighing him down every hour of every day. For all he knows, Kurt could've confided in everyone he knows - it's a close-knit group of friends, and they seem to know every movement anyone else makes. Perhaps they're all looking at him with concealed disgust, thinking he's trying to ruin the relationship they all tout as Kurt's first chance at happiness in years. The happiest he's ever been. They won't give a thought to the idea that Blaine wouldn't want to wreck his own father's chance at happiness, seeing him so in love and made so much younger by sheer joy.

After a late lunch with Santana and Elliott, in between their day jobs and after Blaine's classes have all finished for the day - thank God it's Friday, and he has the excitement of a night out stretching out in front of him - Blaine rushes home, pressing decline on the increasingly frequent calls while he's on the subway. Honestly, his boyfriend can wait a few minutes while he gets home from lunch with his friends. Long distance relationship are about balance.

The moment Blaine gets into the house, throwing his coat onto the rack, he answers the next call that comes in with a bright, "Hi babe! Sorry I didn't answer, I was on the subway and before that I was grabbing lunch with some friends. Is everything alright?"

"Which friends?" Sebastian asks immediately, and he sounds almost cold, suspicious, prickly. Wandering into his room and closing the door behind him - Tina went to pick Artie up, but they could be home any minute, and he doesn't want them overhearing his conversation with his boyfriend. Moments can be so few and far between, he prefers them to be in private.

"Elliott and Santana," he says softly. "Seb, is everything okay with you? Is something wrong?"

"You didn't answer my text about whether I could come visit this weekend," Sebastian says, and Blaine blows a sigh of relief upwards, feeling the cool air rush over his face. This isn't going to be one of those notorious long-distance fights - it's just concern. He feels a little guilty, remembering making a mental note to answer that text that got swept under the rug by a necessity to list his assignments for the weekend.

"We've actually got plans for this weekend - karaoke tonight, dinner tomorrow and brunch with some of Santana's dancer friends on Sunday - but you could come next weekend," he suggests brightly. "Are you finally free, Seb? That's so great, I miss you so much."

"Then why not cancel on your friends and let me come see you this weekend?" Sebastian says, tone sweet and cajoling. "Come on, babe, we'll have your apartment to ourselves and we'll really get to talk."

"I can't cancel, Seb, that would be rude," Blaine says, thinking about how much he's been looking forward to karaoke, proving himself in front of NYADA students, spending time with his friends - maybe tonight will be the night he finally says more than three words to Kurt, "but I can say I'm opting out of any plans we make for next weekend and we can spend the whole time together. Just me and you. I'm sure Tina and Artie could stay with Elliott or Dani just for the weekend so we have some privacy."

"Damn it, Blaine, I wanted to do this in person!" Sebastian suddenly shouts, making Blaine jump. "Have you noticed how every sentence you say has one of your friends in it? Do you even understand how that makes me feel, that you're spending so much time with them but can't spare a weekend for me? Do you even know how often you mention  _Kurt_?"

Shocked by the amount of contempt squeezed into that single word, by this explosion from his otherwise sweet and understanding boyfriend, Blaine quietly offers, "I'm sorry if me spending time with them upsets you. I want to keep a balance between you and the rest of my life, that's the way relationships should be. I really like you, but I can't just abandon my friends. Kurt's picking us up in a few hours to go to Callbacks."

"There you go again, mentioning him! You're not over him, are you? You're not even trying to stop feeling whatever it is you feel for him, even though he's your father's fiancé and you're supposed to be dating me!"

"It's not like that, Seb! There's nothing going on between Kurt and I, we're not even speaking, and getting over people takes time! I want to make things work with you, I just need time!"

"You've had more than a month! It's not as if you were ever in a relationship with him, it's just a stupid crush! I can't take being your consolation prize anymore, Blaine!"

That sends Blaine into silence, his heart lodged somewhere in his throat, cold stealing over him. "What do you mean?" he asks softly, hating the way his voice shakes with fear.  _Please don't leave, please, you're the only one who can make me forget about Kurt, please stay_.

"I've met someone else," Sebastian says softly, but it's like venom in Blaine's veins, and he slumps backwards across the bed, eyes already stinging with tears. "There's such a spark between us, and he's wonderful in every way. He asked me out last week, and we ended up in bed. I'm sorry, Blaine, but I think you always knew I was just a distraction." His voice hardens and he says, "I'm done being second place all the time. It's over."

"You slept with someone while we were still together?" Blaine's voice is shaking, tears trailing down his cheeks, and he curls himself into a ball, like a child hiding from the world. "You cheated on me?"

"Sex isn't the only kind of infidelity," Sebastian says harshly. "You've been cheating on me since we got together - it's always been obvious that your feelings for Kurt are stronger than yours for me ever will be. We've had fun, but staying is going to damage me."

"And what about the damage you cheating does to me?!" Blaine shouts into the phone. "It could've been love between us! I just needed a little more time."

"I'm done waiting for some silly kid who doesn't understand adult relationships," Sebastian snaps, cracking Blaine's heart in two. "If you're not going to put in the effort to keep us alive across the country, I don't want to stay with you. Goodbye, Blaine."

Despite the click, Blaine remains holding the phone to his ear for a full minute, tears sliding down his cheeks, sobs muffled into his pillow.

* * *

_After asking Quinn rather than Santana for advice on what to wear, Kurt preens at the look on Walter's face when the familiar car pulls up outside his window and he runs out to his boyfriend's arms. "Hi," he says softly, wrapping his arms around Walter's neck and rising up for a kiss. Although Walter returns the kiss sweetly, he breaks away as soon as Kurt tries to deepen the kiss, and he can't help the bubble of disappointment that forces its way into his throat._

" _You look incredible," Walter murmurs, eyes flickering up and down Kurt's body and then meeting his, making the blush spill hot across his cheeks. Ducking his head in bashful pleasure, Kurt lets his hand slip into Walter's, feeling like he's coming home as he does, and smiles at him._

" _You too," he says softly, glancing at Walter's classic suit, once again overwhelmed by how handsome he is. No matter what people say about him dating someone so much older, they can't understand how he feels. They'll never see how Walter looks at him in a crowded room and makes his heart skip a beat, or how their hands fit together, or how considerate and gentlemanly Walter is all the time, whenever they're together._

_For the first time in his life, he has that someone - the person all the love songs are about, the person he thinks of last before he sleeps and first when he wakes up, the person who can make him smile with a mere text. Whatever the world may think, they can't touch his feelings for Walter. No one can touch what they have._

_The restaurant Walter booked for the night is a quiet Italian place, the main seating area lit by candles, and their table is hidden away in a shadowed alcove, fat red candles cupped in silver holders and quiet music issuing from above. "This is amazing," Kurt says softly, smiling when Walter pulls his seat out for him and trails his fingertips reverently across his shoulder as he pushes the chair in. This already feels like a romantic evening from the sort of movies he loves, a night straight out of his wildest dreams, the kind that ends with the perfect kiss on a cosy porch._

" _I was here for a company dinner last week, but Saturday night is date night across the whole restaurant," Walter says, handsome in the gentle glow of the candles and reaching across the table to take Kurt's hand. "Our first month together, I want tonight to be special."_

_Those words send a tingle down Kurt's spine, remembering stories from his friends about their first times with new significant others. He thinks about Rachel's story of Jesse picking her up from the stage door and whisking her home; Quinn's story of how gentle and considerate and sweet Puck is towards her behind closed doors; Brittany, so in love and glowing faintly with it, whispering about teenagers in the magical throes of first love. A twinge of nerves clenches coldly in the pit of his stomach, and he tries to shake it off - not tonight. He can't have tonight be ruined._

_The food is exquisite, the atmosphere romantic, and Kurt walks out of the restaurant leaning against Walter, loose from the wine, holding his hand tightly. "This was amazing," he says, and pulls Walter close to kiss him under the star-peppered sky. But, as usual, Walter gently breaks the kiss when Kurt tries to deepen it, and he climbs into the car trying not to let his smile droop._

_His house is empty and dark as they pull up outside - Kurt has never been more glad of his parents' periodic trips to Washington - and he turns to Walter with his most seductive smile in place - born of hours of practice with his friends after a few too many drinks. "Do you want to come inside?" he asks softly, letting the back of his hand press against Walter's thigh._

_Their eyes meet, and then Walter slowly says, "Yeah. Okay. Let me park properly." Trying desperately to control his grin, Kurt jumps out of the car and runs up to the house for the quickest clean-up ever. He straightens the cushions on the couch, shoves a stack of magazines under the coffee table, runs upstairs to make his bed perfectly and checks his reflection while he's there. His hair is still perfectly in place, his cheeks flushed with excitement and drink, his eyes bright. Unwrapping his scarf and slinging it hastily over the hooks, he runs his fingers through his hair to make it look a little more what Santana might say was post-sex, tightens the laces at the back of his vest, kicks off his boots and opens another button on his shirt._

_By the time Walter finds his way into the living room, Kurt is already perched there with a bottle of wine and two glasses, smiling at him. "I'm driving, Kurt," Walter says softly as Kurt fills both glasses, not even trying to hold back the side of himself that always comes out after drinking, that Brittany always calls his 'sex kitten' persona. Despite feeling more and more nervous, agitated and unable to stop his fingers moving, it feels like the moment for this._

" _You can stay here tonight," Kurt says softly, picturing sleeping with his boyfriend next to him, an arm over his side. His mind slips back to the dark, to fingers that pressed bruises into his skin while he closed his eyes and tried to go to some part of himself where there was armour and silence, and he shudders, trying to push it away._

_After one more glass of wine, he feels sensual, desirable, leaning against Walter's side with a soft hum of contentment. "This is so nice," he breathes softly. "Just you and me. Alone." Setting his glass down the table and plucking Walter's untouched one from his hand, he leans up for another kiss, hand on Walter's thigh._

" _I see where this is going," Walter says when Kurt pulls away, frustrated by the lack of reaction. He must be undesirable - of course, Walter doesn't want to sleep with him. That's the only possible explanation for why he keeps pulling away. "Kurt, I don't want us to go further than kissing yet."_

_Relief courses through Kurt - no pushing at those barriers tonight, no hands on him, no hard fingers pulling at his clothes or forceful mouth on his - followed shortly by anger and misery. He ducks his head to try and hide the expression that must splash across his face, but Walter tips his face back up and kisses him, soft and sweet. "You are incredible, Kurt," he murmurs, eyes full of warmth and affection. "You're sweet and intelligent and handsome, and of course you're sexy, and I want us to go all the way one day."_

" _So why not today?" It sounds petulant and childish, and his voice cracks halfway through the sentence, and Kurt feels bad for letting it slip out immediately. "I'm sorry. I don't want to be rude. Of course we don't have to if you don't feel ready."_

" _Kurt, you're the first man I've ever been serious about," Walter says, and Kurt just nods. "So I've never done anything more than kissing with a man."_

_That makes Kurt's eyes go wide and his breath catch in shock. "But, I thought...there were other guys. Before me. After your divorce."_

" _There were a few first dates that never moved to a second one and some very chaste goodnight kisses," Walter says with a small shrug, looking terrified and suddenly shy. "You are the first man I've been on a second date with."_

" _And that's why you keep pulling away?" Kurt asks, trying to be gentle and not sound offended. "I thought it was me. I thought you didn't want to sleep with me."_

" _Oh honey, I'm just scared," Walter says softly, taking his hands. "You are beautiful." Kurt flushes, ducking his head, and Walter lifts his head to kiss him. It's a deeper kiss than ever before, desire flickering hot in the pit of his stomach, but he can feel the hesitation. He recognises it from encounters he's had that were meant to lead to the bedroom, encounters he often left in tears._

" _You don't have to do this for me," he says softly. "We can go as slow or as fast as you want. This is special - I don't want to rush and ruin it." For a moment, the truth in him fights to be heard, wanting to be known - but he can't. That voice inside just keeps whispering_ _ **He'll leave. If you let him know how broken you are, he won't want you anymore.**_

" _I love you." And Kurt sits up straight, staring into Walter's eyes._

" _What did you say?"_

" _I love you." Walter holds his hands tight, smiling into his eyes and leans their foreheads together. "You're so wonderful, understanding and sweet, and nothing has ever been this intense for me. I love you, Kurt Hummel."_

" _I...I..."_ _ **Say it. Say it and make him happy.**_  " _I just don't know if I can say that yet."_ _ **Well, that's it. Say goodbye to your last chance at happiness.**_   _Walter smiles at him, and kisses him again. Harder, more forceful, hands on Kurt's waist pulling him closer. And somehow he finds that spot on Kurt's neck that makes him melt, and sink back into the couch._

_After Walter goes home, leaving Kurt's head spinning with long, passionate kisses, another murmur of 'I love you' against his lips, Kurt immediately grabs his phone._

_**Groupchat: Kurt Hummel, Rachel Berry, Santana Lopez, Brittany Pierce, Noah Puckerman, Quinn Fabray** _

_**Kurt: He told me he loves me.** _

_**Noah: Shit.** _

* * *

Hearing the squeak of his door opening, Blaine mumbles, "Go away, Tina," into his pillow. He already told her what happened, in short, sharp words, and cried off going to Callbacks with the rest of the group. The untouched sandwich she made him is curling at the edges on the nightstand and the coffee has gone completely cold. His chest aches and his eyes are painful from crying, his head pounding dully, and all he wants to do is slip into sleep and forget for a while, even if he has to wake up tomorrow and face the pain all over again.

"It's me," comes a soft, familiar voice, and Blaine turns his head slightly to see Kurt framed in his doorway. He looks unfairly stunning considering Blaine's current state, but nervous standing there, biting at his lip and fidgeting with his scarf. "Can I come in?"

"Whatever," Blaine mutters into the pillow, and hears the creak of the floor as Kurt crosses it, feeling the bed sink beneath his weight. Pulling his head reluctantly out of his pillow cave, Blaine feels acutely aware of his blotchy skin and swollen, red-rimmed eyes. Kurt is looking at him with so much sympathy it makes him want to cry again, and he spits, "Aren't you going to say 'I told you so'?"

"I don't want to fight anymore," Kurt says softly, and reaches for Blaine's hand. "I am so sorry for what I did. It wasn't fair to you, and I should never have lied. I only wanted to know if kissing you sober felt the same way as it did when I was drunk, and it didn't. I  _love_  your dad, Blaine. I can't wait to marry him, and for you to be my family. Do you still want to be my family?"

Looking up at him, earnest softness and a tentative smile, feeling their fingers pressing together, Blaine pulls in a shuddering breath and says, "Yes, I want you to be my family. I want my dad to be happy. Is that all you came to talk about, because I just want to curl up here and sleep."

"I'm sorry he cheated on you," Kurt says softly. "I will never mock your pain, Blaine. You deserve so much better than him." Squeezing Blaine's hand tightly, he says, "You deserve someone who is patient and kind and understanding, someone who won't give up on you, someone who'll know what an honour it is to have your heart."

"I didn't love him," Blaine mumbles, wishing he could stay in this moment forever - Kurt holding his hand, looking at him with such care and concern, making his heart twist painfully, the heartache of being cheated on lesser compared to what he feels for Kurt clawing at his throat, words screaming to be said.

"You were on your way there, Blaine, I know it," Kurt says softly. "You wanted to love him, sometimes it just takes a little time to get there. You deserve someone who knows that, someone who gets you, someone who won't just up and leave when things get a little rough. Relationships take work, and it's the people who try that wind up really happy."

"Did you just come here to act as my therapist?" Blaine asks softly, and Kurt smiles.

"No, I came here to bring you to Callbacks," he says, and squeezes Blaine's hand comfortingly. "Taking to the bed tonight won't do you any good, come out with us. I'll buy you a panini from this amazing coffeeshop on the way, and given how many of us have been cheated on in the past we all know plenty of angry songs you can sing to get all the sadness out of your system and reach that perfect 'fuck him' stage."

"Fuck him," Blaine repeats with a grin, and Kurt smiles at him. "Let me get changed, I'm not dressed to impress the NYADA students I wasn't invited to be part of."

"Let's go prove Tibideaux wrong," Kurt says, and Blaine falls gratefully into the hug he offers with outstretched arms, curling up into him. "I don't know why he'd ever let himself lose you," Kurt murmurs into his hair, and Blaine smiles, snuggling further into Kurt's arms and burying his face in his neck, surrounded by his warmth and the scent of his cologne. "You're perfect, Blaine."

"No I'm not," Blaine says softly, and then Kurt pushes him away, face deadly serious, eyes gazing into Blaine's and making his heart beat out of time.

"You are to me," he promises forcefully, and then stands abruptly. "Let me help you choose what to wear. I've always loved a good makeover."

When they reach Callbacks, Blaine is greeted like a king. The place truly does live up to the hype - the fruity drinks are delicious, the patrons are incredibly talented and he gets a satisfyingly long round of applause after both an angry rendition of  _Before He Cheats_  and a slow piano singing of  _One Song Glory_.

Sipping on his drink, sitting next to Brittany and Santana curled up together, Blaine stares up at Kurt's tear-filled eyes shining in the lights as he dedicates  _Being Alive_  to his fiancé, the first man to ever love him the way he loves them, and feels his heart beating against his chest, the air trapped in his lungs, his throat constricted and his mouth dry.

He's in love with Kurt.

* * *

_Handing another customer their morning coffee, Kurt stares at the wall and thinks about Walter. It's only been a month, how can he already be saying those three words that promise so much, and yet are so terrifying? The last time Kurt was in love destroyed parts of him, sending his heart into shadows, starting a process of healing that still isn't complete. If he gives his heart so wholly to Walter, he's opening himself up to the possibility of more hurt, of losing someone else and being left alone in the dust._

_But he can't deny that Walter makes him feel safe and connected. Around him, Kurt feels like the best version of himself, confident and witty and able to show affection freely, without worrying about boundaries or being rejected. There's only a handful of people he can feel himself around - for Walter to have become one of those in just a month, there's definitely a deeper connection between them._

" _Good morning." The voice is familiar, and Kurt blinks away his musings to look into Walter's eyes. He's impeccably dressed, on his way to work, and Kurt's heart skips a beat, the bottom seeming to drop out of his stomach. "Medium drip, please."_

" _Coming right up," Kurt chirps in his perky work voice, then adds, "Handsome," in a whisper to see Walter smile. Turning around to prepare the coffee, his breath short, Kurt makes a split-second decision as he collects the orders from other people on their way to work, smiling to himself as he scrawls names on the cups._

_After he presses the cup eagerly into Walter's hand, heart pounding, Kurt watches him glance down at the writing, black letters against the white cardboard._ _**I love you** _ _, written out for all to see - because Kurt can't be ashamed or afraid of how he feels. He can't be scared of his own feelings because of his past. This is something wonderful, something that truly is making him happy - that is scary, of course, but it's exhilarating. It's the start of something amazing. "Oh_ _**Kurt** _ _," Walter breathes, blinking at him and reaching for his hand across the counter. Holding him without shame, in the middle of a homophobic town. "I love you too."_

_Leaning across the counter, pushing down the fear that rises cold in his stomach, Kurt kisses Walter with all the love he has stored up in his heart, for someone who returns that love as sweetly and generously and selflessly as Walter does. Walter's hand curls around the back of his head, pulling him closer, and Kurt can't help but smile. He's in love, with someone who loves him back, and that is the best thing he could've ever asked for._

_**Groupchat: Kurt Hummel, Rachel Berry, Santana Lopez, Brittany Pierce, Noah Puckerman, Quinn Fabray** _

_**Kurt: I told him I love him too.** _

_**Noah: Holy shit.** _


End file.
